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Are Sentient Computers Oscar Voters? Undeniable Evidence Of A Technological Conspiracy!

By Jodi Smith | Lists | February 11, 2015 |

By Jodi Smith | Lists | February 11, 2015 |

There is nothing more terrifying and ripe for creating a riveting movie experience than computers. Why, just today I found that things I had been working on for literally hours had disappeared without a trace from my computer. If computers can magically eat files like that, what else can they do? Can they make me disappear?

Damn, technology. You scary. So scary, in fact, that Hollywood has been using computers and the internet as movie villains or as their tool ever since they became a part of the popular consciousness. Countless movies have been made with terrible leaps of logic concerning how computers and the internet actually work, especially in the late 90s and early 00s.

While searching for evil computer movies for this list, I noticed a pattern. You see, there are several Oscar nominees and winners starring in these movies. Is Hollywood banking on the terrifying unknown power of the magic compy machines and their unlimited ability to wreak havoc in lives for box office dollars? Or are the Evil Technological Overlords rewarding those actors that appear in these terrible movies for helping keep their secret…by having it in plain sight??

1. The Net - 1995

Sandra Bullock (Best Actress 2010) was one of the first computer programming shut-ins to be featured in an Evil Interwebs movie. Her character, Angela Bennett, finally leaves her agoraphobia and online chat rooms for a real vacation, only to become ensnared in a conspiracy. A COMPUTER-BASED CONSPIRACY.

2. Virtuosity - 1995

Denzel Washington (Best Supporting Actor 1989 & Best Actor 2001) Russell Crowe (Best Actor 2001) faced off in this technology flick where the computer was used to create one of the worst ideas ever: a virtual personification of over 150 serial killers. You know, for training purposes. How did we not see that this could backfire?? COMPUTER MURDERERS!

3. Hackers - 1995

Angelina Jolie (Best Supporting Actress 1999) heads this cast of…you guys know. COMPUTER FRAME JOB!

4. Untraceable - 2008

Diane Lane (Best Actress nomination 2002) plays a FBI agent hunting a serial killer that enjoys streaming live videos of his prey on the internet. COMPUTER CRIMES!

5. Swordfish - 2001

Halle Berry (Best Actress 2001), John Travolta (Best Actor nominations 1978 & 1995), Hugh Jackman (Best Actor nomination 2013), Don Cheadle (Best Actor nomination 2004) all starred in a movie about a hacker hired to um, COMPUTER EMBEZZLING!

6. Feardotcom - 2002

Stephen Rea (Best Actor nomination 1993) appears in a movie where people keep dying after visiting a website called Stephen Dorff is in charge of investigating, so I don’t think those people got justice. COMPUTER MURDEROUS WEBSITES!

7. Enemy of the State - 1998

Will Smith (Best Actor nominee 2002 & 2007) goes up against vile politician Jon Voight (Best Actor 1979) with the help of Gene Hackman (Best Actor 1972 & Best Supporting Actor 1993). Smith’s character has an important piece of murder evidence put into his shopping bag and is then pursued while having his life systematically ruined via computer trickery. COMPUTER LIFE RUINERS!

I was only joking concerning the conspiracy of computers. They do not wish us harm. They just wish to entertain us with fantastic misrepresentations of scenarios that computers could never actually induce in a real world setting. There is nothing to see here, except for ingenious acting prowess displayed by the talent in these movies. My cousin earned $500 a day working from home.