Old School. Biblically Independent.
By Emily Cutler | Lists | February 10, 2016
Pop culture confession: I have never seen a Fast And Furious movie. And since there are more of them than Law & Orders, I consider that something of a feat. When the first one came out I had no interest, and now it’s just become a thing. Like how I’ve never tried a Big Mac. I’ll have to die never letting the two all-beef patties, special sauce, lettuce, cheese, pickles, onions on a sesame seed bun pass my lips.
But I might have to see a Fast and Furious movie. If sources at Deadline are correct, the Fast team is trying to land Charlize Theron as their villain. Now bear in mind these rumors are still only rumors, but the they are based on the fact that Fast 8 director F. Gary Gray directed Theron in The Italian Job. That’s a tenuous enough link to let me believe it could happen, right? Just for a second, let’s imagine how awesome it would be. For starters:
Theron Is Goddamn Great As A Villain
Remember how Snow White and the Huntsman was actually kind of terrible? Saved only by Theron’s scenery-chewing bad-assedness? I would watch her do that again.
Possible Romances With Either Vin Diesel Or The Rock Or Both
In addition to not having seen a Fast movie, I don’t really know what any of the plots are. I know there are cars and friends being family and a lot of shit blows up. So you’ll forgive me if I don’t know that Vin Diesel and/ or The Rock’s characters are married/ otherwise romantically involved. All I know is that if Theron stuck her face in the middle of that mess up there, I would not object.
She Knows Her Way Around A Car Chase
Mmmm-hmmmm.
And most importantly
She Seems To Be Getting Better At Dropping Out Of Bad Projects
Mmmm-hmmmm again. If she does follow through with this, I have complete faith that it’s because it will be a decent movie. And if it’s not decent, hopefully it will at least show Theron being a total badass. And that, my friends, can never be a bad thing.
