Old School. Biblically Independent.
By Nadia Chaudhury | Lists | July 9, 2014
Set your alarm to the tune of the Breaking Bad theme song: the 2014 Emmy nominees will be announced tomorrow morning. You just know Modern Family is going to win everything AGAIN, so instead of the boring old mainstays, here are some new categories I want the Academy of Television Arts & Sciences would add next year, along with who should win it this year. Warning, potential spoilers ahead.
Outstanding Multi-Episode Arc
Winner: “In the Woods,” 11-12, Louie
Runner up: “Pamela Part 1-3”, Louie
Outstanding Kickass Woman
Winner: Molly Solverson, Fargo
Runner up: Arya Stark, Game of Thrones
Outstanding Naked Moment
Winner: Eric Northman, True Blood
Runner up: Lisa Tragnetti, True Detective
Outstanding GIF Moment
Winner: Harrison’s accident, Dexter
Runner up: Jesse Pinkman’s freedom, Breaking Bad
Outstanding Child
Winner: Tina Belcher, Bob’s Burgers
Runner up: Sally Draper, Mad Men
Outstanding Death
Winner: Prince Oberyn, Game of Thrones
Runner up: Richard Harrow, Boardwalk Empire
Outstanding Ghost
Winner: The always smirking Will Gardner, The Good Wife
Runner up: Kyle Spencer, American Horror Story
Outstanding All-Star MVP
Winner: Tatiana Maslany, because, yeah.
Runner up: Michiel Huisman, Nashville, Game of Thrones, Orphan Black
Outstanding Inmate
Winner: Poussey Washington, Orange is the New Black
Runner up: Lorna Morello, Orange is the New Black
Outstanding Veep Put-Down
Winner: “That sh*t-shoveled-faced-f*ckin’ Jonah,” Dan Egan
Runner up: “You let that unstable piece of human scaffolding into your house?” Selena Meyer
Outstanding Duo
Winner: Abbi and Ilana, Broad City
Runner up: Rust Cohle and Marty Hart, True Detective
Outstanding Pet
Winner: Ferguson the cat, New Girl
Runner up: #FreeCashew, House of Cards
Outstanding Actor Who Was on The Wire and You’re Happy to See Is Still Getting Work
Winner: Maestro Harrell, Malik on Suburgatory, Randy on The Wire
Runner up: Michael K. Williams, Chalky White on Boardwalk Empire, Omar Little on The Wire
Outstanding Clone Dance Moves
Winner: Helena, Orphan Black
Runner-up: Allison, Orphan Black
Nadia Chaudhury is hoping for 1) a Breaking Bad sweep, and 2) that Modern Family doesn’t get anything.
