Hello, and welcome to the nightmare future.
All the polls leading up to the election predicted a Tory win. But it was still a shock when the exit poll suggested we were facing the biggest Tory majority since Thatcher’s heyday, and the worst Labour performance in decades. As we went into the witching hour, it was just a matter of waiting to see how accurate the exit poll was. Say it isn’t so.
Reader, it was utter carnage.
This morning, sore heads will be wondering WTAF happened. We’ll be getting into all that soon, once we have the stomach for it, but for now?
Corbyn has already announced that he won’t lead the Labour Party through another election, after losing Labour heartland seats in the North and the Midlands. When former mining towns are turning Conservative for the first time, you know that something has gone terribly wrong. Lib Dem leader Jo Swinson lost her own seat to the SNP, by just 149 votes. Independent Group leader and former Tory Remainer rebel Anna Soubry lost her seat, coming third behind the Tories and Labour. Former Labour and Independent Group defectors Chuka Umunna and Luciana Berger, standing as Lib Dems, both lost out.
The SNP had a good night, as did Plaid Cymru. In Northern Ireland, the pact between the SDLP and Sinn Fein successfully knocked the DUP’s deputy leader out of his seat, with both parties gaining ground in Belfast.
But by about 5am, it was confirmed. Boris Johnson has won, Trump is smug, there’s no stopping Brexit, and we’re utterly screwed.
It’s going to be rough for a while, folks.
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