Kristen Stewart Returns to the Vampire World (With Oscar Isaac!)

Kristen Stewart is making a bold return to the world of vampires, but this latest project sounds way different than Twilight. In Flesh of the Gods, Stewart will star with Oscar Isaac as they’re “seduced into a glamorous, surrealistic world of hedonism, thrills, and violence.” Not a lick of Mormonism in sight! (The Mary Sue)

Sofia Vergara covers PEOPLE’s Most Beautiful issue? That checks out. (Lainey Gossip)

Whenever you start to foolishly believe that both parties are the same so there’s no point in voting, remind yourself that Republicans will never stop fighting tooth and nail to make life hell for LGBTQ kids. (Wonkette)

Emma Stone and Nathan Fielder are already working together again. This time, for a movie on the recent chess cheating scandal, and yes, it’s the anal bead one. (A.V. Club)

The forbidden episode of Bluey is forbidden no more. (Polygon)

Meghan McCain is absolutely furious that Drew Barrymore didn’t treat Kamala Harris with more respect. The same Meghan McCain who once pushed “Kamala is a Cop” t-shirts with her dipsh*t husband. Shame, how does it work? (Deadline)

The live-action He-Man movie just will not die. It’s now jumped ship from Netflix to Amazon, who recently killed it with Fallout, so maybe this won’t be a total disaster? (Slashfilm)

Speaking of streaming services, SAG-AFTRA and Nielsen are teaming up to validate viewing data, which could get interesting. (The Wrap)

Jay Leno says Jerry Seinfeld’s Pop-Tart movie is “exactly what America needs right now,” so go ahead and assume it’s the exact opposite. (THR)

“How can I be financially secure as a freelancer?” Lololol, you can’t. All you can do is grind it out, until one day, you manage to convince some employer in an another field that you know the right buzzwords and get the hell out. Godspeed. (The Cut)

Now that the news cycle around Kristi Noem murdering her dog is dying down, let’s turn our attention to the goat that she also shot dead. (Daily Beast)

Elisamaza76 thinks maybe she should be concerned by the number of times she’s listened to Jeaniene Frosts’ Kiss of Darkness, but it combines her two loves: vampires and romance. “There are some interesting things going on here concerning power, consent, vulnerability, and different kinds of strength (recurring themes for Frost), and it’s fun to watch Mencheres surrender to the inevitable.” Are there books you read over and over again? (Cannonball Read 16)