Why Does the President All of a Sudden Want To Get Into Heaven?

In light of James Comey’s initial court appearance this morning over weak charges literally Trumped up by a newly installed prosecutor, Lindsey Halligan — a Trump appointee who replaced a prosecutor who refused to file charges against Comey — there’s apparently not much Congress can do to prevent these transparently political prosecutions. But you know who can? State bars. This is a bad case. The State Bar of Virginia might want to investigate Lindsey Halligan for bringing frivolous charges. The federal government under this administration apparently doesn’t hold these lawyers to any sort of standard, but the state bars sure as hell could.

Just a thought. Before we get into the return of Josh Johnson to The Daily Show, where he mostly talked about Trump’s efforts to, uh, get into heaven and his ridiculous answers to questions about pardoning Ghislaine Maxwell, we should at least mention Pam Bondi’s testimony in front of Congress yesterday. Johnson briefly touches on it, but doesn’t really capture Bondi’s attempts to stonewall through whataboutism.

To wit, when Richard Blumenthal asked Pam Bondi a simple yes-or-no question — did border czar Tom Homan keep the $50,000 that undercover FBI agents caught him accepting on video as part of a bribery investigation — Bondi didn’t answer. She instead lectured Blumenthal for lying about serving in Vietnam. When Senator Adam Schiff pressed her and asked if she’d release the video, Bondi asked, “Will you apologize to Donald Trump?”

Then, when Senator Sheldon Whitehouse asked Bondi whether Jeffrey Epstein had shown author Michael Wolff photos of Trump with topless girls, Bondi didn’t deny it. Instead, she accused Whitehouse of accepting political donations from LinkedIn co-founder Reid Hoffman, who apparently had social ties with Epstein prior to 2008. First off, Hoffman has never contributed to Whitehouse’s campaign. And second, that’s not an answer to the question.

Finally, as Johnson points out on last night’s The Daily Show, when Pam Bondi was questioned about who gave her the order to flag mentions of Trump’s name in the Epstein files, Bondi repeated the question as though she hadn’t heard it, then said she flat-out refuses to discuss that with the senator.

So yes — Trump gave her the order. Yes, Epstein showed Michael Wolff a photo of Trump with topless girls. And yes, Tom Homan kept the $50,000, and no, Bondi won’t release the video. For those keeping track at home.

And it is weird that Trump keeps talking about wanting to get into heaven.