Don’t Get Too Excited for Danny McBride’s New Vampire TV Show

The Righteous Gemstones has come to an end! I have twin four-year-olds and am perpetually behind on everything (I still haven’t watched the first season of Andor), but I will make a point to finish Gemstones soon. In the meantime, I’m encouraged by the positive reception the finale has garnered. People really seem to be digging it, and aren’t out there rampantly spoiling every last detail. Now, McBride is being asked about his next project, and lord almighty, did you know Danny McBride wants to make a vampire TV show?

It was announced that McBride was interested in adapting a book called The Southern Book Club’s Guide To Slaying Vampires for HBO a little less than a year ago. The novel is about a woman in an unsatisfying life, with only her book club to bring her joy. Then, she meets a mysterious man who makes her feel more alive, until she realizes he’s undead. The book sounds like a hoot, and our own Kayleigh Donaldson vouches for it. To make it even sweeter, Gemstones star and standout Edi Patterson developed the project with McBride. That’s a surefire deal, right?! Not so fast.

There haven’t been any developments since the initial announcement, and now we may know why. McBride revealed in a recent interview that he and Patterson are having trouble getting the show out of the grave. “We haven’t gotten much momentum on it,” he explained to The Hollywood Reporter. “Even at HBO, it’s tough making a 30-minute show ensemble that mixes genres. Really difficult. I love that property and would love to do something with it, but I don’t know. We worked on it for a bit, and we weren’t getting the reaction to it that we were wanting. It’s sort of floating out there right now.” Booooo!

The book sounds perfect for McBride and Patterson’s sensibilities. Mixing genres is something McBride excels at. Plus, his track record with TV is more than proven! To be fair, his track record with horror is less impressive, but dammit, this would be more than a straightforward horror project. This has the potential to be what McBride is best at: adult entertainment. I don’t mean that salaciously. It’s just that McBride creates things that exist in their own kind of space. A show about a small town book club beset by a vampire would be impossible to describe in simple terms, and that’s good!

McBride seems as flabbergasted by HBO’s hesitance as I do. He would go on to explain that he thought the show would be an easy sell (as he should). “To me, it’s a no-brainer,” he noted. “I feel like HBO should just want to go greenlight that now. We should have moved right into shooting the pilot after we wrapped Gemstones. Maybe it’s just not what they’re looking for right now.” As annoying as it is, McBride is probably right. David Zaslav is still in charge. If HBO is looking for anything under his leadership, it’s a way to add a black bar on the screen during sex scenes.

We likely won’t see McBride and Patterson battle vampires anytime soon. If HBO isn’t interested, I doubt anyone else will be. Ironically enough, I don’t think I’d want the show to go anywhere else. HBO let McBride play a retired baseball player who goes on an insane journey of self-discovery and cocaine. Righteous Gemstones gives a detailed character study of an evangelical church-running family. Vice Principals is about feuding, small-town vice principals! You let him take those swings, HBO, now let him slay some f***ing vampires!