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45 Pop Culture Facts that NO ONE DENIES

By The Pajiba Staff | Miscellaneous | January 20, 2017 |

By The Pajiba Staff | Miscellaneous | January 20, 2017 |

During these trying times, we’re here to redirect your anger away from politics and at us for our 100 percent absolutely correct opinions on pop-culture matters. These facts cannot be denied.

1. Pine is the best Chris.

2. The Princess and the Frog is the best Disney princess movie.

3. In 25 years, Emma Stone will be considered a classic movie star. Anna Kendrick and Chris Pratt will have been mostly forgotten.

4. Stephen Colbert doesn’t have ‘it’ anymore.

5. The King’s Speech is the worst Oscar winner since Crash.

6. Leslie Knope is the least entertaining character on Parks and Recreation

7. Archer should have ended up with Pam, not Lana.

8. Munich is Spielberg’s best movie since Schindler’s List.

9. WALL·E was kinda boring.

10. The last great Pixar movie was Up.

11. American Gods < Neverwhere < The Ocean at the End of the Lane

12. The worst band of the early aughts was Incubus.

13. Grover is the best Sesame Street character.

14. Ben Affleck's Batman wasn't terrible, and neither was Jared Leto's Joker.

15. People give Jennifer Lawrence too much shit for continuing to be herself, but also, Jennifer Lawrence was never as cool as everyone wanted her to be.

16. The only wrong way to eat a Reese's is frozen.

17. Every terrible musical artist has at least one song you secretly jam to. Literally every single one.

18. 99% of the country celebrated the Cubs win because that meant Cubs fans would finally shut the fuck up.

19. Grease 2 is better than Grease.

20. Wizard of Oz is a terrible, just goddamned awful, movie.

21. If we could undo the terrible things they've done, the celebrity we would most like to have back in our good graces is Arnold Schwarzenegger.

22. Coffee is better than tea. This is not up for debate.

23. The most upsetting sex dream you could ever have would be about Michael Douglas or James Woods because, for a split second, you'd be totally into it.

24. All musicals have flimsy plots.

25. Electricity is basically magic. It's magic with rules, but it's still more magic than half of what's in fantasy novels. Moreover, literally no one knows how WiFi works. If you had to explain it to someone from the past, your answer would be "magic."

26. Caddyshack is a bad movie and everyone agrees, but they just don't know it.

27. St.Patrick's day is the worst holiday.

28. The acceptance of Michael Bolton as ironic hero is the best to happen to society.

29. Dave Grohl is the most attractive unattractive man in the history of the world.

30. Thai food is not only the best Asian food, but somehow -and uniquely among cuisines - tastes EXACTLY the same in every single country on Earth.

31. Samoas are the best Girl Scout Cookie.

32. No, wait. Peanut Butter Patties are the best Girl Scout Cookie.

33. Game of Thrones does not rank in the Top 5 TV dramas of the past decade.

34. The internet was so wrong about Alison Brie that it ruined Alison Brie's career.

35. Winona Ryder always has and always will kinda suck (Publisher's Note: This is just patently false, and it will not stand, and I know everyone here agrees with me. But we do not assign staffer names to each of these facts to protect the safety of our writers, isn't that right, EMILY?)

36. Lindsay Lohan was never a wasted talent. The idea that she had potential stems from attempts to eulogize her while she was still alive.

37. GRRM wouldn't have finished even if the television series hadn't happened.

38. Terence Malick has never made a watchable film.

39. Blake Lively has the career success that should've gone to Leighton Meester after Gossip Girl.

40. Chicago deep-dish pizza is awesome and Jon Stewart is just a hater.

41. Noel>>>>>>>>>>>Ben

42. Hamilton really only has like 6 good songs. (DAMNIT EMILY)

43. Learning cursive is a pointless vestigial limb of education.

44. Heat is the greatest movie ever made


Dustin is the founder and co-owner of Pajiba. You may email him here, follow him on Twitter, or listen to his weekly TV podcast, Podjiba.