Desperate times call for…ridiculous attempts to analyze a few shots of Game of Thrones’ characters in maybe three seconds of new “footage?” Jebus, people! This shit is getting embarrassing.
Last night in a promo that aired somewhere in and around The Leftovers second season finale (about which I’ll keep my lips mostly zipped since I’m apparently the only one who thought it was a load of crap that walked directly in the Lost finale footsteps), HBO aired a 2016 series preview:
At the 2:15 mark, we get our big moment; a shot of Daenerys:
Looks like she may not have bathed for a while (or the camera lens is dirty), and I’ll bet she’s thinking something. Don’t quote me on this, but it’s probably something we’ll see in season six.
Here’s Prickly McDickster riding some poor beast (I guess we should be thankful it’s not a human):
Hey look, he’s still a Bolton! Or, at least there’s a Bolton nearby. Now that I’m thinking about it, it’s possible that’s only the head of a horse. That could be Theon/Reek wearing a horse head. Probably not, but they’re completely off-book now; anything can happen.
And now, the long shot — by a millisecond — of Cersei going in for a Tommen hug.
Her hair has totally grown! Sorry, that’s all I got.
There is pretty much nothing revealed in the new shots, but that hasn’t stopped the interwebs going bananas screaming about them (and I think we’re all being generous with the word “footage”). Here are a few of the headlines; Google News is running about 135 links to the big news:
“HBO Teaser Features Games of Thrones Season 6 Footage”
“Game of Thrones season 6: New footage shows return of Daenerys, Cersei and Ramsay”
The First ‘Game Of Thrones’ Season 6 Footage Is Here And It’s Very Upsetting
“Game of Thrones: New HBO Promo Teases Season 6”
“Game Of Thrones’ Season 6 Spoilers: 3 Things You May Have Missed In The Latest HBO Promo Video”
“Go crazy Overanalyzing the First Three Seconds from Game of Thrones Season Six”
Overanalyzing? I think we passed that five seasons ago. But look, we don’t want you to miss out on a second of Thrones-ery; we’re here for you. See you next week when we’ll probably get another shot of our favorite flowing haired *possibly* Undead bastard wistfully staring at…something.