We Don't Typically Post Movie Posters, But Most Movie Posters Don't Look Like This

By Dustin Rowles | Film | January 24, 2024 |

By Dustin Rowles | Film | January 24, 2024 |

While we’re grousing over last night’s New Hampshire Republican primary results and expressing disappointment in the Oscars for snubbing Greta Gerwig, Prime Video dropped the movie poster for Jake Gyllenhaal’s upcoming remake of Road House from director Doug Liman (Edge of Tomorrow, Mr. and Mrs. Smith).

It will probably provoke feelings in you, either of the “GOOD GOD, JAKE” variety or the “Really?! They’re rebooting Road House now?” variety. But it will almost certainly provoke something in you.

Fans of the original may notice some callbacks in the background (“Be Nice,” the “3 Simple Rules” poster), which may feel honoring or sacrilegious, depending on your feelings for the Patrick Swayze original. What does feel idiotic is Prime Video’s decision to skip theaters with this and go straight to streaming on March 21, 2024. Whatever else one wants to say, this is Doug Liman, Jake Gyllenhaal, and a fairly popular IP. Good or bad, that movie would open well.

But we don’t make the rules. If we did, the rules would be: Never underestimate your opponent; expect the unexpected; Take it outside, never inside; and Be Nice.