Friends, there is a weird condition known as misophonia, which I most definitely have. For those of you unaware of what it is, misophonia is basically a hatred of certain sounds that can trigger your fight or flight response. I’m not kidding. There are a very small number of sounds that can turn me from a pleasant, decent person into an absolute rage monster within a matter of seconds. Because I’m an adult and this isn’t the Thunderdome, this rage gets (barely) contained under the surface, but it is very real.
I will turn from Bruce Banner into the Hulk if you eat crunchy foods or scrape your teeth on a fork. That’s it, of all the sounds in the world to make, it’s those two that will make me grit my teeth, and either leave the room or try desperately to block the noise out. It feels like a personal affront whenever someone does this within earshot. I’m not irrational, I know it’s not, but it triggers an intense anger in me that I cannot properly describe.
Misophonia is literally all in my head. In one of the few studies done on it, researchers found that trigger sounds—almost always related to eating or breathing—activate parts of the brain for people with misophonia that don’t for non-sufferers.
Up until a few years ago, I figured this was just a weird quirk of mine until a coworker 2 feet away from me took to sloppily eating an apple every single day. I nearly murdered him, and in a fit of frustration, I googled my rage and found it’s not an uncommon feeling. Kelly Ripa is on record as having it and having a hatred of listening to people eat (the ghouls at 20/20 decided to insert b-reel of people eating with sounds in the video below, and I died a little inside when it popped up, fair warning.)
So what does this have to do with a A Simple Favor? Those bastards decided to insert a scene of characters loudly chomping on salad in the middle of the damn movie. For no real reason. I wanted to throw my drink at the screen.
Chomping on the screen, while not a widespread occurrence, definitely happens occasionally in a movie, show, or god forbid, a commercial. A few years ago there was a cereal commercial where some guy was crunching his damn food so loudly that he couldn’t hear what his coworkers were saying to him. It was torture to have it pop up on the screen, and I would rush to mute every time it came on. That sound makes me want to kill or be killed. As soon as it’s gone, the urge is over. It’s an extra indignity to have this happen during an advert, something I didn’t even ask to see.
There is nothing in the world I’d like more than if everyone in Hollywood collectively decided to never again have scenes of people eating crunchy food, because nothing sets me on edge more than if a random scene pops up where everyone decides to enter an apple eating contest.
Is it a weird, minor inconvenience? Yes, absolutely. I feel dumb even writing about it, but that scene in that damn movie is still with me…and if you had seen A Simple Favor, you’d know how forgettable it was.
So, Kelly, if you’re reading (we all know you are) if you haven’t seen A Simple Favor yet, avoid it at all costs. It will send you into an uncontrollable rage, all because some knucklehead decided to insert a scene of people eating salad.
Header Image Source: Lionsgate