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This Week In 'F*ck That Guy': Roman Polanski, Woody Allen, Jake Paul

By Kayleigh Donaldson | Celebrity | February 18, 2020 |

By Kayleigh Donaldson | Celebrity | February 18, 2020 |


Jake Paul YouTube.png

Welcome back to another exciting addition of F*ck That Guy! Get your daily dose of rage to fuel the rest of your week right here. Step right up and marvel at how white dudes are continuing to ruin absolutely everything!

— For those of you still bemoaning how eeevil ‘cancel culture’ is destroying our fragile society, you’ll be happy to know that alleged child rapist Woody Allen is still out there getting work. His latest film, the newest addition to a decade of near-unwatchable titles you forgot existed, is Rifkin’s Festival, which is heading to the European Film Market in Berlin with producer Mediapro handling rights. The film stars Christoph Waltz, Gina Gershon, and Louis Garrel, with Allen taking the unexpected decision to tell the story of an older man who has an affair with a vivacious younger woman. Ground-breaking. Rifkin’s Festival was shot at the San Sebastián Film Festival, just to remind you of how much Europe’s film industry still loves alleged predators. The chances are that this film won’t get American or British distribution, but, of course, those cultured artistes of the continent are out there cheerleading for Allen. It’s almost like the words and traumas of young women are worthless compared to a ‘great artist’ or something. Speaking of…

— Confirmed child rapist Roman Polanski is currently the toast of the town with his latest film, An Officer and a Spy, nominated for 12 awards at the Césars, the French equivalent of the Oscars. The film previously took home the equivalent of second place at last year’s Venice Film Festival, losing out on the top prize to Joker, a thing that actually happened. Polanski has won Best Director at the Cesars four times before, most recently in 2014. This year, however, he’s actually facing some pushback for that time he drugged and raped a 13-year-old girl, admitted to statutory rape, then fled the country so he would never face and true consequences for it. The entire board of directors of the César Academy resigned last week in response to the lack of transparency over the nomination process and the obvious controversy of, you know, the rapist. Many French feminist groups have protested Polanski’s latest film, which was still a big hit in the country. Polanski has also faced more recent accusations of sexual assault, which he denies.

— Noted jackass Jake Paul is currently trying to get as much attention as possible because it’s the only skill he possesses but it seems that he’s not quite ready to desecrate suicide victims like his bro. He’s now ‘spreading awareness’ for mental health, apparently, by tweeting that anxiety is ‘created by you. sometimes you gotta let life play out and remind yourself to be happy & that the answers will come. chill your mind out. go for a walk. talk to a friend.’ You know how some people really think they’re helping, even though they’re monumental numpties who shouldn’t offer advice under any circumstances? Paul isn’t that person, because he just wants people to hate him enough to click on his videos. Remember, this guy’s target audience is still kids. Christ, YouTube is bleak.








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