Guys, every little thing he does is magic. Whether he’s being held back from photographers like a 6 year old throwing a fit, or “climbing” the Great Wall of China on the shoulders of his servants posse, he’s just delightful. A precious pile of ridiculous. He’s my favorite least favorite person. You can’t hate him because it’s too unintentionally silly and adorable. Everytime he tries to act like a big man, you just want to ruffle his hair and hand him a Tootsie Pop. What a scamp.

This weekend, he visited a brothel in Rio, which, given the crowd of bystanders surrounding him, was either a poor decision or, more likely, a totally on-purpose act of “I’m big and tough and a man and I have penis-vagina sex with ladies! With my boners!”

Also, he wore a sheet. Presumably to put out all the fires of the passionate lovemaking of a tiny baby pop star.

I know! You thought it was a scary ghost! But it wasn’t! It was just Justin! Oh, Bieber! *hair ruffle*

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