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Taylor Swift and Tom Hiddleston vs. Blake Shelton and Gwen Stefani: Battle of the Totally Natural Relationships

By Courtney Enlow | Celebrity | June 28, 2016 |

By Courtney Enlow | Celebrity | June 28, 2016 |


The Pre-Romance Breakups:

Immediately prior to coupling, we saw the end of Calvin Harris and Taylor Swift.

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And immediately prior to coupling, we saw the end of both Gwen Stefani and Gavin Rossdale…

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And Blake Shelton and Miranda Lambert.

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Point: Shefani

The “Low-Key More Like LOL-Key” Photo Opps:

Gwen and Blake have been seen at weddings of prominent Voice contestants.

Taylor and Tom have been seen recreating goddamn From Here to Eternity and Rhode Island restaurants eating swans.

Point: Swoki

The “Sources”:

Sources say Tom and Tay are: “in love!”, “could be the one!”, physically incapable of letting go of one another’s bodies, pretty sure Kanye West has “no class!”, that Tom was totes not involved in Tay’s breakup with Calvin Harris, that Tom was totes def involved with Tay’s breakup with Calvin Harris.

Sources say Blake and Gwen are: signing prenups, trying to get pregnant, had a secret wedding, are “incredibly nice people,” breaking up.

Point: Shefani

Somehow, Taylor and Tom are more subtle and less constructed than Gwen and Blake. The bar is just like Gwen’s jeans circa “Rock Steady”—super low.

But give them time. Give them time. They just made out on top of the goddamn Coliseum. They’ll leave Gwen and Blake in their dust within weeks.