Welcome to another episode of Meghan McCain, the forever-replenishing, low-hanging fruit of topical comedy that I’ll reach for every time like the lazy sloth that I am. In today’s installment, Meghan dropped a massive Game of Thrones spoiler on “The View” by blurting out how the season finale ends to millions (thousands?) of viewers and poor Sunni Hostin, who’s only on season four. Even worse, she said “spoiler” after she already told everyone who rules the Iron Throne, which is not how spoiler alerts work. You put that sh*t before, Meghan, before. Like so.
SPOILERS FOR THE FINAL EPISODE OF GAME OF THRONES
Also, one other warning, this is easily the worst Meghan McCain clip I’ve ever seen in my life. It is physically painful to watch. I know we’re not supposed to call women shrill, but I don’t know what other word to use to describe what’s happening to her voice. It usually doesn’t sound this bad or make every dog on my street hang themselves in the garage. (If anyone asks, I worked from Starbucks today.)
Before we start picking apart Meghan’s tantrum, I just want to point out the look on Joy Behar’s face when everyone realizes how badly John McCain’s daughter just stepped in it. In that moment, Joy became the Three-Eyed Raven and saw the future of Meghan McCain headlines.
She’ll never be this happy again.
So right up front, Meghan and I are actually in agreement that making f*cking Bran the ruler of Westeros was horrible. Not only he is creepy as hell, but as Sansa helpfully pointed out, his dick is all broken. So basically Westeros is now ruled by an incel who apparently can see the future, but conveniently neglected to mention that part before all the genocide happened. Smart, awesome. Sure that will go great.
Speaking of Dany, Meghan and I were also rooting for the Mother of Dragons, which makes all kind of sense for John McCain’s daughter. A blonde girl who coasts off her famous last name AND drops napalm on her enemies just like her dad? That’s a Podrick-sized power fantasy straight to the dynastic noonerhole. That said, Dany got screwed real bad in the final episodes, and I’m sure Emilia Clarke is loving that I just tied her character directly to Meghan McCain. I’m a helper.
Anyway, back to John McCain’s daughter. After realizing she just ruined the show for millions of people, Meghan could’ve easily said “My bad, I’m sorry” and let it go. Even Whoopi acknowledged that it wasn’t her fault because it honestly seemed like none of the producers warned them not to drop spoilers. Instead, Meghan spent three nails-on-a-chalkboard minutes shrieking about how “real fans” watch the show when it airs before sliding into Alt-Right Barbie mode.
Via People (emphasis mine):
“As a dedicated fan who watched live last night like everyone’s supposed to, okay, it was terrible. I was so disappointed,” she continued. “I’m sorry you guys were so triggered by me telling you the ending.”
Wow, Jesus Christ. I get that Meghan can never admit she’s wrong or she dissolves into a pile of mayo, but her entire schtick on The View is to fly off the handle at the tiniest hint of a slight. So she’s really not in a position to lecture anyone on being “triggered” when her only contribution to the show is screaming “John McCain’s sperm runs through my veins!” if Abby Huntsman even sneezes wrong. Seriously, go back and watch the spoiler clip (if you dare) and tell me who’s “triggered.” Because it sure looks like it’s the Blonde Kool-Aid Lady who burst through the wrong wall. Again.
Header Image Source: The View/YouTube