Old School. Biblically Independent.
By Kayleigh Donaldson | Celebrity | May 13, 2026
Look, sometimes it's just nice to be pandered to.
The Cannes Film Festival kicked off this week and Jane Schoenbrun's latest film, the delightfully titled Teenage Sex and Death at Camp Miasma is the opening movie of the Un Certain Regard section. It's a lascivious meta slasher film about a queer director who is hired to helm the reboot of a classic horror franchise and hopes to get the original movie's final girl in her cast. Hacks star Hannah Einbinder and legend of all-time Gillian Anderson are playing the lead roles. That's enough to get us into the theatres, but let it be known that both Gillian and Hannah know how to pander to their audiences.
Before setting out to the press conference and photocall, Gillian and Hannah shared a little cheek-to-cheek dance. "Jean Smart! Eat your heart out!" cried Anderson, calling out Einbinder's Hacks co-star and igniting at least a few fandom wars on Tumblr. Deborah/Ava shippers, you've got competition!
You can say a lot about Anderson and her icon status, but never deny that she knows who her core demographic is. She is here for the queer girls. Straight dudes, are you really necessary? I'm sure Hannah, who is a bisexual millennial, got to live out a few fantasies here. Will there be more of this in the movie? Here's hoping! Teenage Sex and Death at Camp Miasma is screening as I type and the first round of reviews should be dropping by the end of the night. Shout out to Jane Schoenbrun, one of the era's most exciting directors, for getting their moment in the spotlight at the biggest film festival on the planet.
