David Schwimmer lives in Manhattan’s East Village, the birthplace of punk rock and the neighborhood where Ryan Adams, Iggy Pop, Lou Reed, Darren Aronofsky, and Lady Gaga live. Apparently, it’s also it’s also where neighbors stiff their prostitutes.
Yesterday around 5:40 a.m., a 26-year-old man hired a 21-year-old prostitute, and after services were rendered, the 26 year old refused to pay. A fight ensued, the two men ended up smashing through a door in a hotel lobby, and they were eventually taken to the hospital to be treated for stab wounds.
Whose fault it? Police had only the accounts of the two men until Friends star David Schwimmer got involved. He lives next door to the building, and his surveillance camera caught the whole thing. Schwimmer, upstanding citizen that he is, had the cops over to his house, and let them watch the footage.
I have two questions, however: Why does David Schwimmer have a surveillance camera pointed at the building next door? Does he spend a lot of time spying on his neighbors? And second: What’s the mystery in this case? You don’t pay your prostitute, you get stabbed, folks. That’s justice. The only thing the police needed to do was look in the pockets of the prostitute. Was there money for services rendered? If not, then the stabbing was justified. End of story.