By Emily Richardson | Celebrity | November 8, 2023 |
By Emily Richardson | Celebrity | November 8, 2023 |
People reports that Alec Baldwin and his wife, Hilary “Hilaria” Baldwin, née Hayward-Thomas, are pitching a family reality show “that would give an inside look at their life” raising seven kids (get ready): Carmen Gabriela, 10, Rafael Thomas, 8, Leonardo Ángel Charles, 7, Romeo Alejandro David, 5, Eduardo “Edu” Pao Lucas, 3, María Lucía Victoria, 2, and Ilaria Catalina Irena, 14 months. ¡Ay, caramba! That’s a lotta Baldwinitos!
A source tells People that Alec and Hilaria are “excited”, but would only do the show if it was “an authentic portrayal of who they are as a family.” Um, an authentic portrayal? But wouldn’t that require everyone use their auténtica accents?
The insider continues: “The kids all have such fun personalities and Hilaria and Alec know how much interest there is in their lives.” Apparently, the couple likes “the idea of giving people a behind-the-scenes look at raising a big family.”
Alright. Here’s the deal. I could pretend that I’m too good for this show, but I’m not. I would hate-watch the crap out of it. Unfortunately, as long as 65-year-old Alec and 39-year-old Hilaria have any say in the edit, this attempt at “reality” is doomed to suck. The couple will insist on pushing their “one big wacky family” narrative and cut out all the juicy bits.
But what we, the viewing public, deserve is a Real Housewives-style portrait of two narcissists trapped in a palace (er, $11.7 million NYC penthouse) of their own lies and delusions. I want Hilaria’s accent going in and out, Alec raving about what a genius Woody Allen is, the poor nannies up to their neck in diapers, the ongoing Rust mess, cameras catching Hilaria texting the paparazzi, Tina Fey avoiding the couple at a charity event, etc.
Instead, we’ll get Alec’s version of Cheaper By The Dozen. Last week, he went on SiriusXM’s Let’s Talk Off Camera podcast, and told Kelly Ripa that, if he did do a reality show, it would be all about family:
“Everything’s about my family. I have really tried in the last several years, once we had five and then six, and then seven kids. I can’t go anywhere for any length of time,” he explained.“In the old days, I’d jump on a plane and go to L.A.. … It was easy to pick up and go … I need 12 plane tickets — nannies, kids, my wife, I need, like, 11,” he continued. “They don’t even have 11 seats in the business class section of the plane.”
Ugh, can you imagine not being able to find 11 seats together in business class? I don’t know how these two do it!