Sometimes, celebrities really are better than you.
While scanning TMZ for something to get incensed about for today’s column, I came across a little tidbit that made me question the very fabric of this reality. I shan’t spoil. I’m saving it for number one. But it made me wonder what other Fascination Streets exist for us to go down, because if creating an entire post out of the desperate need to post a one sentence fact is wrong, I don’t want to be right.
5. Jack Nicholson, Eric Clapton and Bobby Darrin all had mother issues
Jack Nicholson, Eric Clapton and Bobby Darrin each had assuredly traumatic “she’s my mother *slap* she’s my sister” moments. Each had to discover the woman who raised each was not his mother, but his grandmother, and the woman he believed to be his sister was actually his biological mother.
4. Steve Guttenberg - Outstanding at turning down amazing roles
Steve Guttenberg turned down two of the most iconic film roles of the ’80s, possibly of all time: Josh in Big and Peter Venkman in Ghostbusters. He turned down the latter to star in Police Academy.
3. Demi Moore is half blind; Rob Lowe is half deaf
It’s exactly how it sounds. Demi is blind in one eye and Rob Lowe is deaf in one ear.
2. Penn Jillette wants to get you off
Penn Jillette, lover of debunking and titties, invented a hot tub with special jets designed to get women off. It’s called the Jill-Jet.
1. Chuck Lorre wrote one of the greatest cartoon theme songs of all time
When you think of Chuck Lorre, it’s generally to wish him ill, a pox upon his house. But what you should be thinking of is this:
So next time you find yourself generally enraged by the very existence of Two and a Half Men, remember his sizable mark on the world’s most fearsome fighting team.
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