Pajiba

This is why you are jealous of that bitch Megan Mullaly.

Deep fried bacon. That is all you w ill need to die happy.

Also this.

Slow and low, that is the tempooooo.....
Start the bacon in a cold cast-iron and bring up the heat just to medium. Bringing it up to temp slow will render off some of the excess fat before it really starts to "cook" so it can get crisp without burning.

I HATE burnt bacon. Burnt bacon is an affront to proper baconry - it should be crisp and melt in your mouth, not crunchy and hard and charred. Don't get impatient and turn that heat up or you'll end up with blackened nasties; just keep an eye on it as it sizzles and flip 'em over a few times so they stay even.
Drain them on a paper towel and then hand them all to me. All of them.

An ole' timer bbq guy once told me that bacon was the only meat meant to be fiddled with while it cooks.

Live it. Learn it. Love it.

what Americans call bacon makes me sad inside
but you know no better
its your parents fault
and their parents fault and
probably Nixon's agriculture guy too,
like with the corn syrup and the beefs
streaky bacon certainly has its place
but its all you seem to know
and it makes me sad inside

Blech, you like that English "bacon" which is actually just a chunk of ham, don't you? Fascists.

Well this has been informative and inspiring. I've always been a frying pan kinda guy, but this weekend I'm going to try doing bacon in my convection toaster oven. I've got a baking tray with a rack, so I'm thinking I'll lay the bacon on the rack and try it at 350º or 375º with the convection on.

In the oven on about 400 (not broiler), drizzle the bacon with maple syrup. You'll kill yourself for ever forgetting that step.

Someone downvoted bacon with maple syrup?

Rub it with brown sugar THEN glaze with maple syrup. It's called bacon candy.

That might be a little too sweet for me.

I have been known to make PBB sandwiches, for breakfast:
Toasted multigrain bread, perfectly crispy bacon, a shmear of peanut butter on both sides, and a drizzle of good honey. I'm not kidding in the slightest. Maple syrup would only improve this combination...

After getting divorced from my vegetarian wife of 8 years, I went on a bacon spree (probably reducing my life expectancy by an equal number of years in the process). While I am a big fan of the simple stovetop frying pan preparation, I think my favorite way was to wrap the bacon around other meat (say, a chicken breast) and pop it in the broiler. Sexy meat on meat action, delivering an orgasm for the tastebuds.

But there are some things you probably shouldn't do with bacon. I tried Rogue's Bacon and Maple Ale a couple weeks ago... and it was totally nasty. The fact that it comes in a bottle the same color as Peptobismol should be a clue...

Meat on meat is decadent goodness. That is how I like my pigs in a blanket, tiny sausages, sleeping peacefully in a tightly wrapped blanket of maple-cured bacon.

Topped with salsa and a mix of melted shredded cheeses... ooooh...

12 minutes a side under a broiler? It is either powered by candles or you like charcoal.

10-15 minutes at 400 depending on desired crispiness.

Dig that crispy meat, baby.

I had to stop watching this because I'm at work and the combination of Nick Offerman, his hands, that t-shirt, and bacon was making me flush.

i don't like bacon.

now, BRING ALL THE HATE!

We only hate people. Which you clearly are not.

Oh, and if you use that thinly sliced shit, Nick and I are coming to your house and his mustache is going to bang your wife or husband while I watch and point and laugh at your obvious failure as a human being.

You take the bacon, put it on a smoker at 150 for twenty minutes, bump the heat up to 275 until it reaches the doneness you desire. (I prefer mine to melt like a smokey strip of porcined buttery freedom) Or for you numbers people, another twenty to twenty-five minutes.

Porcine Buttery Freedom is the name of my memoir.