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Too Cute To Die: Film and Television's Saddest Sacrifices

By Joanna Robinson | Posted Under Seriously Random Lists | Comments (76)

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Optimus Rhyme and esme brought this list to my attention because they are heartless monsters who want to make you weep on this beautiful Wednesday afternoon. Warning, here be a few spoilers, but none of them more recent than 2007. Weeeell, except one, but, trust me, you already know.

Charlie Pace
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That Cute Ewok
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Leslie Burke
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Allen Francis Doyle
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Wallace
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The Tenth Doctor
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Beth March
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Dobby
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Thomas J. Sennett
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Bambi’s Mom
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Kenny McCormick…You Bastards
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Joanna Robinson realizes the Ewok in that close-up photo is not the Ewok who dies in Return of the Jedi. Google Image search can only work so much magic, my dears. Now excuse her, she has something in her eye. Email! Twitter!









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Comments

You missed Old Yeller, Marley, and Edgar from 24.

Posted by: Dorothy Snarker at May 4, 2011 4:04 PM

*pours one out for my lost comrade in arms*

Posted by: Angeleno Ewok at May 4, 2011 4:07 PM

The ten doctor had it coming

Posted by: cockroach at May 4, 2011 4:08 PM

wub wub
:(

Posted by: Ian at May 4, 2011 4:13 PM

Pssssht, whatever. I was glad when Charlie died. He was Too Whiny To Live.

Posted by: stardust at May 4, 2011 4:15 PM

Wub wub indeed.

And Charlie may have been whiny, but you gotta admit "Not Penny's Boat" gets ya *right here*.

Posted by: MM at May 4, 2011 4:21 PM

Artax?

Posted by: StoatCat at May 4, 2011 4:21 PM

Artaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaax

Posted by: I Need More Allowance at May 4, 2011 4:23 PM

Oh and Wash. WASH. I'm a leaf in the wind, watch how I. . .*sob*

Posted by: I Need More Allowance at May 4, 2011 4:28 PM

I automatically think of Juey/Little Jude in "Jude" with Kate Winslet and Christopher Eccleston.

Posted by: sars at May 4, 2011 4:29 PM

There is only one: Old Yeller

C'mon he saves the kids like 59 times then THE KID has to kill him?! How is that even a kids show? Todays kids would be scarred for life if they saw it.

Posted by: logan at May 4, 2011 4:29 PM

Wash! Oh Wash! And Doyle! And Tara! And Penny! Damn you Whedon!!

Posted by: Phedre at May 4, 2011 4:30 PM

Charlie.....*sob Wash...*sob sob Edgar....*sob sob SOB...... Dobby....*SOB SOB
Ofelia...*OHMYGAWD!!

Posted by: dammitjanet at May 4, 2011 4:40 PM

Fred and Anya. Damn you, Joss.

Posted by: RobP at May 4, 2011 4:41 PM

Aw, Dobby. That was the only part of the book series that made me weepy. Apparently to me human deaths are peachy keen whilst mythical creature deaths are traumatizing.

Exception: Wash. Wash's death kicked me in the gut. WWHHHYYYY!!!!!!!!

Posted by: Kiddo at May 4, 2011 4:49 PM

I was sure that Hank and Dean Venture would be on this list! WTFuck?

Posted by: Leftylad at May 4, 2011 4:50 PM

"Wash! Oh Wash! And Doyle! And Tara! And Penny! Damn you Whedon!!
Posted by: Phedre"

And Fred, Wesley, Jenny Calender, etc etc. Whedon owns this thread - he will kill what you love and you'll still end up begging for more. Evil genius.

Posted by: kimk at May 4, 2011 5:06 PM

Ianto.

Posted by: BWeaves at May 4, 2011 5:09 PM

Posted by: duckandcover at May 4, 2011 5:19 PM

To whomever said, "Artax," damn you. My eyes grew wide and my pupils constricted as I was suddenly transported back to my first viewing of that film.

I am traumatized. Again.

Wash's death was fucking rough. Whedon is such a mean bastard.

Posted by: Kala at May 4, 2011 5:19 PM

God I was the most heartbroken teen when Doyle died. He really was the reason I loved the show :(

Posted by: hoover19 at May 4, 2011 5:20 PM

Wallace did not sacrifice himself. He was executed. Big difference.

Posted by: Mike D at May 4, 2011 5:21 PM

I wasn't sad at all when Charlie died. That'll teach you to drag Sun through the forest and scare the shit out of her, fuckhead.

Posted by: Todd at May 4, 2011 5:22 PM

WHERE'S WALLACE, STRING?

Also another tear here shed for Wash.

Posted by: zeke the pig at May 4, 2011 5:22 PM

No mention of Seymour? YOU HEARTLESS BASTARDS!

Posted by: longcoat000 at May 4, 2011 5:22 PM

I find it extremely sad that Jake Lloyd's career was killed off.

Posted by: Greedy at May 4, 2011 5:24 PM

Hedwig the owl - Harry potter 7
I cried so hard, unexpected and started the unrelenting last book.

Posted by: kilmo at May 4, 2011 5:37 PM

I tend to fast forward through the ewok portions of Return of the Jedi because it improves the quality of the movie. The brutal killing of dozens of ewoks is merely collateral damage.

Posted by: greer at May 4, 2011 5:52 PM

McCauley Culkin = one of the cutest kids ever to have lived. EVER.

Posted by: samantha t at May 4, 2011 5:57 PM

Ol' Yeller had it coming. Not because he was rabid. No no. Because he was a dog.

You heard me.

Posted by: superasente at May 4, 2011 6:01 PM

The Tachikoma tanks. And they did it while singing, the cute little bastards.

Posted by: Big Softie at May 4, 2011 6:24 PM

Little Foot's mom in Land Before Time wrecked me.

Posted by: Dizzle at May 4, 2011 6:43 PM

Florence from Meerkat Manor? I cried for a week.

Mitchell in Being Human (a different use of the word "cute" entirely I grant you, but nonetheless)

Posted by: PaddyDog at May 4, 2011 6:46 PM

I second (or third) Artax!

Posted by: Laura at May 4, 2011 6:50 PM

Bambi's MOM-- oh my 5 year old self is weeping again... you missed the mom from Land Before Time, and the mom from Mishka Mushka....

yea anything with mom animals really kills me...

Posted by: sara at May 4, 2011 6:58 PM

Charlie dying notsomuch, but not Penny's boat choked me up. Which is funny, bc when I first saw that picture it immediately looked like "Penis boat." I can't help but wonder if that would have lead to a more satisfying series finale...

Penis boat.

Posted by: beet salad at May 4, 2011 7:09 PM

Artax! As a child I seriously hated the film for that scene, and it has certainly prevented me from going back to watch it as an adult. I don't even like horses but everything about that scene was just the worst.

Posted by: beet salad at May 4, 2011 7:13 PM

You left out the ones that broke me when I was a kid. Going to see "The Black Cauldron" when it came out in theatres (and a more disturbing Disney Flick is hard to find even today) I was weeping and screaming at the screen when Gurgi crawled into the eponymous crockery and gave up his life.

Or how about Nausicaa of the Valley of the Wind? I had recurring nightmares for a decade after watching all but the very last few minutes when I was about eight. The image of that dying baby Ohmu pushing the wounded Nausicaa into the acid lake haunted me until I saw the whole film as a teen. It was like an emotional millstone being lifted right off my shoulders.

Posted by: Wintermute at May 4, 2011 7:29 PM

The one that ALWAYS made me cry as a kid - when the ant died in Honey I Shrunk The Kids. Anty! He saved those brats!

Posted by: Acho at May 4, 2011 7:29 PM

Fuck Charlie. Dying was the best thing he ever did for that show.

Posted by: Gabs at May 4, 2011 8:45 PM

I laughed when the Ewok died. Best part of that movie.

Posted by: Darcy at May 4, 2011 9:18 PM

ewoks are grotesque no-neck little monsters and you know they got to smell like just straight ass.

Posted by: firedmyass at May 4, 2011 9:27 PM

That gif of Tenant has me all choked up, and aww man it actually upsets to see wallace :(

Posted by: Freckles at May 4, 2011 9:34 PM

Spock. "Of all the souls I have encountered in my travels, his was the most... human."

Posted by: CptCrckpot at May 4, 2011 10:03 PM

Dobby's death in the last Harry Potter movie didn't affect me that much, but when I read the book originally, it straight up slayed me. And I'm a macho dude (hey, you can't prove otherwise.)

In a similar vein, I joined many people in mourning when Cesar Millan's beloved pit bull Daddy passed away. We love that show in my family and Daddy was like another part of our gang. So silly...

Posted by: Uriah Creep at May 4, 2011 10:34 PM

Even though I should have figured out to be careful before I read this, I've only just begun the Wire, so this was a bit of a spoiler.

Posted by: Me at May 4, 2011 10:48 PM

Anna Draper

Posted by: Jo 'Mama' Besser at May 4, 2011 11:01 PM

The Snowman in The Snowman

Posted by: Jo 'Mama' Besser at May 4, 2011 11:01 PM

Not technically a death, but Mona Simpson's being forced to abandon Homer for the lam was a sad one. Seymour (Fry's dog in 'Jurassic Bark') was a tear-jerker, as well.

Posted by: Jo 'Mama' Besser at May 4, 2011 11:06 PM

Definitely Wash.

And Leslie Burke.

When Dobby and Hedwig died in the book, I was like "wtf just happened." Especially with Hedwig. And Rowling just glossed over it like it hardly mattered! No Dumbledore there, though? He's pretty cute in the books with all the passwords to his office and always wanting someone to have a nightcap with him.

I'd also like to agree with Ofelia from Pan's Labyrinth.

Posted by: chipwitch at May 4, 2011 11:15 PM

Dobby's death really upset me... I have a dog that looks just like him.

Posted by: Jessica at May 4, 2011 11:18 PM

Mufasa. I haven't seen The Lion King in years, but I'm pretty damn sure I still wouldn't get through that scene without crying. Don't judge. You cried, too.

Posted by: Lauralyn at May 4, 2011 11:30 PM

Charlie Pace- Yeah that was kinda sad. He had harmless hamster thing going on

That Cute Ewok- Good thing I am too young and cynical to be affected by this too much. Not realistic enough

Leslie Burke- That was just wrong on so many levels. A sucker punch to your teeth while getting kicked in the balls

Allen Francis Doyle- Ok that's getting too much. Seriously tone it down

The Tenth Doctor- Fuck you Pajiba. Fuck you

Posted by: Minto at May 5, 2011 12:22 AM

Also...

RECENT GAME OF THRONES SPOILER......


What about Lady? So sad!

Posted by: Angeleno Ewok at May 5, 2011 1:27 AM

Every time I watch Children Of Earth I cry like a little baby when Ianto dies. The idea of dying knowing the person you're in love with will so very easily get over you just gets to me.

Posted by: Irina at May 5, 2011 2:44 AM

@Dizzle

Oh my god you just had to go there. The music to The Land Before Time still makes me weepy. I recently got streaming Netflix and tried to watch it just for nostalgia's sake and didn't make it ten minutes into the movie.

Posted by: Dingles at May 5, 2011 3:22 AM


D'Angelo: Where's Wallace at? ... Where's the boy, String?

Stringer: D'Angelo, shut your mouth.

D'Angelo: Where's Wallace? That's all I wanna know.

Levy: Kid, you better think...

D'Angelo: Where's Wallace? Where the fuck is Wallace?
Huh? Huh? String? String? Look at me! Where the fuck is Wallace? HUH!? I don't want this Payless-wearing motherfucker representing me. I'mma get my own man. So just get back in your car and get the fuck back down south.

Stringer: A'ight, you stupid motherfucker, you made your decision

D'Angelo: Yeah, I made my decision. Where's Wallace at? Where the fuck is Wallace? Where's Wallace, String? String! Where the fuck is Wallace? Huh? Stringer?!

Also, Doyle killed me. Masterful writing on that one. As for Charlie, the moment that gets me is in the episode before, in the boat with Desmond. It's the moment that Charlie chooses to die, that it's his destiny and it needs to be him, THAT'S what gets to me. The actual death is a touching visual, but that boat scene is just great.

Posted by: Steve at May 5, 2011 5:44 AM

Maude Flanders.

Posted by: Bob Kelso at May 5, 2011 5:51 AM

Hooch

Posted by: kirbyjay at May 5, 2011 6:06 AM

Am I the only one who thought the one ewok was fucking the other ewok?

Return of the Jedi sucks ass. I'm glad the ewok died. I wish they all got eaten by a rogue ATAT.

Posted by: Lucas at May 5, 2011 8:27 AM

whywhyWHY did you all remind me of my beautiful Mitchell and Ianto???????

Posted by: dammitjanet at May 5, 2011 9:19 AM

WASH, totally. That was so awful, my God.

Also, Old Dan and Little Ann from Where the Red Fern Grows. I saw that movie in school when I was in fifth grade. It fucked up every last one of us. Our teacher, Mr Hutto, let us have recess for the rest of the day because he couldn't do a goddamn thing with us.

Posted by: Cletus at May 5, 2011 9:42 AM

Charlie died because he stood on the wrong side of the door when he closed it. You lose major sadness points when you die of stupidity. (or was it inevitability...?)

Posted by: ShagEaredVillain at May 5, 2011 9:48 AM

The thing about Dobby:

I went to the midnight premier of HP7, and had done more than a little pregaming while we waited. On top of that, I was with a large group of friends, and the theater on the whole was very vocal. (Time Square audiences, please don't shout at the screen).

So Dobby's giving that long-winded speech in Malfoy Manor, and I mutter, "Alright, Bellatrix. Just stab him already!" and we share a good chuckle.

Next thing you know he's all bloody lying in Harry's arms, and I'm crying like a menopausal cat lady.

Posted by: ShagEaredVillain at May 5, 2011 9:57 AM

Oh, DOYLE. *sob*

Posted by: Anna von Beav at May 5, 2011 10:07 AM

Dobby's death in the film didn't faze me; but I when I originally read it, I had to put the book down and cry for 5 minutes. Nothing else in the HP's hurt me like that one did.

Posted by: BWeaves at May 5, 2011 10:39 AM

Oh my god, The Doctor regenerates. He'd done it nine times before, and everyone knew that it would happen again. It's how being The Doctor works.

I just can't get so worked up about something that everyone knew was going to happen from the beginning.

Replace Ten with Wash, and I will be a sobbing mess.

Posted by: That Girl at May 5, 2011 11:02 AM

Bruce Willis in Armaggedon! He died despite not wanting to miss a thing!

I just can't get so worked up about something that everyone knew was going to happen from the beginning.

Yes, obviously, it's the same character overall and his regeneration is a likely conclusion, but it's how he's uniquely played from Doctor to Doctor that makes it feel like a finality. That's the significant difference between the Doctor and Captain Jack.

Posted by: branded at May 5, 2011 11:22 AM

HE CAN'T SEE WITHOUT HIS GLASSES.

Gets me every time.

Posted by: Sofia at May 5, 2011 12:07 PM

Y'all are a bunch of anti-ewok bigots.

Posted by: Angeleno Ewok at May 5, 2011 12:41 PM

Raymond the firefly, but he was reunited with his beloved Evangeline.

Posted by: Xiufetish at May 5, 2011 12:56 PM

Oh god, Artax. And it's so much worse in the book because he can talk:
"With every step we take, the sadness grows in my heart. I've lost hope, master. And I feel so heavy, so heavy."
GOD. DAMMIT
:(

Posted by: embertine at May 5, 2011 2:41 PM

The sacrificial death of The Lone Gunmen, to me, seemed stupid and pointless.

Posted by: Darth Darko at May 6, 2011 7:28 AM

The Wire SPOILER

I would a D'Angelo to the list, myself.

Posted by: Three-nineteen at May 6, 2011 10:42 PM

Oh Glenn Quinn (has a genuine cry)

Posted by: Nadine at May 9, 2011 11:05 AM

Not the longest post, but then again myNJ Birthday Party site hasn't many posts either, and a rubbish theme - Great post all around, added your XML feed! Love this theme, too!

Posted by: Frances Langness at May 18, 2011 6:50 AM