By Dustin Rowles | Posted Under Seriously Random Lists | Comments (28)
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Posted by: sars at September 21, 2011 12:41 PM
Yeah Rowles that's his right. Isn't it funny when you try to make fun of someone else and screw it up?
Posted by: logan at September 21, 2011 12:47 PM
Can someone please please please cut together one of those "...makes the same face in every picture" videos of this suasage link? It would be awesome on so many levels because his pose never changes either.
HH1_Edits...get on it!
Posted by: PissBoy at September 21, 2011 12:48 PM
Is it possible that Taylor Launter doesn't actually exist and is really just the creation of a very good, but not quite that good Photoshopper?
Posted by: Socrates_Johnson at September 21, 2011 1:04 PM
Look, I know teenage girls and middle-aged housewives who act like teenage girls aren't really very bright but how is this kid a fucking sex symbol? He has the hair of a Tucker Max-level Douchebag and the face of an 18-month old baby boy. Everyone person that finds Llamautner sexy is going to have BIG issues when they're older.
Posted by: Paultera at September 21, 2011 1:05 PM
yeah it leans to the right. weird.
Posted by: Jodie at September 21, 2011 1:16 PM
How many photographs of Taylor Lautner did you go through before you realised this? And then how many in order to make this post? I'm concerned, Dustin.
Posted by: Thijs at September 21, 2011 1:20 PM
All this tells us is there is a better than even chance he's right handed, and he sucks as an actor.
Posted by: Roland at September 21, 2011 1:24 PM
Makes perfect sense. Llamas are native to the mountains of Peru. This is merely photographic evidence that Taylor Lautner has evolved to walking up the side of mountains in a circuitous manner. His right leg is obviously four inches shorter than his left.
Posted by: Wednesday at September 21, 2011 1:31 PM
@Wednesday:
I love it!
Posted by: MM at September 21, 2011 1:33 PM
Can we get an official approval on Taylor Llamautner Dustin?
APPROVED! It is now in the Pajiba handbook. -- DR
Posted by: Mrs. Julien at September 21, 2011 2:26 PM
The juxtaposition of his baby-llama head and shoulders right above the pair of legs poster makes me giggle. It's like he's in this movie where the top half of him is a dude and the bottom half is not, and twisted around backwards due to a botched plastic surgery job, and he has to work as a stripper or a freak show person to pay for it to get fixed, and then Jonah Hill is one of his regulars who becomes strangely attracted to this half-llama half-woman beast, and they have a sweet and rewarding romance.
And best of all, when he gets the procedure reversed on Jonah Hill's dime, Jonah STILL loves him, forward facing man legs and all.
Now THAT'S a Taylor Llamautner movie I would watch the hell out of.
Posted by: linny at September 21, 2011 2:55 PM
You mean his anatomical right.
We're not taking Llamautner's perspective here. His point of view is like a cow's opinion.
Posted by: branded at September 21, 2011 3:22 PM
It's moo?
Posted by: Mrs. Julien at September 21, 2011 4:13 PM
^This? This is the only bad part of you doing EE. Unless you allow yourself to pick your own comments.
Posted by: Paultera at September 21, 2011 4:31 PM
The last one is reversed, look at his hairline and squint.
Posted by: Hooper at September 21, 2011 4:37 PM
What that be MOOOOOOOOOOOT?
Posted by: logan at September 21, 2011 4:37 PM
He really does need more face to go with that nose.
Posted by: wembley at September 21, 2011 4:39 PM
*WOULD not what. English is HARD math is easy!
Posted by: logan at September 21, 2011 4:41 PM
The last one is reversed, look at his hairline and squint.
Posted by: Hooper
Or, you know, read the sign behind him.
Posted by: Paultera at September 21, 2011 4:55 PM
When your neck is 2/3 as long as your face, you have . . . well, you have too much neck.
Posted by: Lauren at September 21, 2011 5:07 PM
Paultera
While it has not been expressly forbidden by Dustin, I did decide it would be unethical to include myself in EE. Not even the Torquemada joke, or "I was fired for subordination once. I was a dominatrix at the time", or that time I made up an entire song about Scoot McNairy to the tune of "Maria" from West Side Story. It's a good thing I'm not bitter.
On an up note, I am going to be on TV when the people from that new show H8er come along and dare me to call him Llamautner to his face.
Mrs. Lysander Julien
Posted by: Mrs. Julien at September 21, 2011 5:49 PM
Hmm...I'm thinking it's something to do with the hair product (trying to come up with a llama-friendly mousse pun here) weighing down the side with the most hair.
Posted by: NateS1973 at September 21, 2011 5:54 PM
And yes, I realize that would've been funnier if I had typed "moose" what with the whole llama thing, but somehow I know there'd be a spelling cop on my arse before the day was out.
Posted by: NateS1973 at September 21, 2011 5:58 PM
Look at that fucking nose!
It's like a 3-D topographical chart of Mount
Areyoufuckingkiddingmetherestofuscouldusesomeairquithoggingitfuckwit.
Posted by: D-Day at September 21, 2011 6:44 PM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sgkYHhG18uc
Everybody Sing!
May you all hear this damned earworm of a song every time you see him.
Posted by: bleujayone at September 21, 2011 11:09 PM
i agree with the last one being reversed. um, writing on the wall?
anyway, it makes your whole assumption moot. please take this thing away.
Posted by: gp at September 22, 2011 12:22 PM
Looking at all those images together makes it absolutely clear that Taylor Lautner lives in Uncanny Valley. He's clearly a bad CGI job.
Posted by: Edith at September 23, 2011 1:04 AM
You mean his anatomical right.