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antz is a better film than a bugs life

I might get pilloried for this, but Deep Impact is a pretty good movie and better than Armageddon. (And Valmont is quite good as well; excellent Henry Thomas performance.)

both a bug's life and antz are equally good in different ways.

bug's life is just Seven Samurai with bugs.

and i prefered deep impact

It's interesting that I've either seen both movies in the pair ups, or neither of them.

And how do you compete Colin Firth vs. John Malkovic? You just can't. It's a tie.

Oh Deep Impact. How I loved Leelee Sobieski and the little hobbit fella before he was a hobbit. I haven't rewatched in years, so I don't know if, objectively speaking, Deep Impact is a good movie, but damn, it had everything I wanted. Trauma, catastrophe, sacrifice. Morgan Freeman as president. Oh, oh and Tea Leoni. She's damn easy on the eyes.

I will, however, beat anyone who says bad things about the Truman Show in the face with the nearest blunt object (in this case, a very heavy Norton anthology of literature).

CAUSE I MISS YOU BAAAAAABY

As for Prestige Vs. The Illusionist, they both have their charms, but Prestige wins for one very important reason: practical magic effects vs the CGI crap in Illusionist.

Why does Scarlett Johanssen's face take up that much space on the poster?

I think they wanted men to tear the poster apart with their dicks in cinema lobbies around the world.

She's very pretty.

EVEN WHEN I DREAM OF YOOOOU

But Deep Impact has a brief appearance by Jason Dohring. Win.

But Armageddon featured a (kinda) Russian-accented Peter Stormare!

Also, Saving Private Ryan versus Thin Red Line, Godzilla versus Gamera, The Descent versus The Cave, and, lest we forget the MOST IMPORTANT pairing, Prefontaine versus Without Limits.

I always liked Deep Impact better than Armageddon, and I always will. I've actually been hankering for a somewhat plausible sci-fi disaster movie for a long time now; Roland Emmerich just doesn't cut it anymore.

Maybe the fact that SciFi recently ran an entire Saturday of "Earth gets fucked by giants space rocks" movie marathon has something to do with it...

There is no question that Deep Impact is a better movie than Armageddon. I mean, one has Morgan Freeman and Vanessa fucking Redgrave; the other has Bruce Willis and Liv Tyler. Do we need to say more?

And in other Pixar vs. Imitation-Pixar offerings:

Finding Nemo vs. Shark Tale (am I spelling that right?)

Toy Story vs. Small Soldiers

AND I DON'T WANT TO MISS A THIII-ING!

StoatCat, you're the Joe Perry to my Steve Tyler.

Tora Tora Tora versus Pearl Harbor
Friday Night Lights versus Remember the Titans
Dazed and Confused versus it's horrible imitation that I can't remember the name of
Bull Durham versus Major League 3: Back to the Minors
And most major movies versus their porn parodies

Truman
Capote (PSH Rules!)
Priscilla Queen of the Desert (Terence Stamp in drag!)
Red Planet
Dangerous Liaisons (c'mon...Malkovich at his creepy sexy best)
And the rest I don't give a rat's ass about.

I DON'T WANNA MISS ONE KISS

(and this is where I sadly depart for work. *sob*)

Todd,

I spent 20 minutes looking for that damned movie. Holy tarantula tits, that was a BAD movie. As is the case with many terrible movies with unknown actresses, its only redeeming quality was that blond girl's breasts.

Prefer Deep Impact and Wyatt Earp.

Valmont is for dead broke men.

Infamous is better than Capote and Valmont is better than Dangerous Liaisons.

Dangerous Liaisons never worked for me. Uma Thurman is too old to play Cecile. Keanu Reeves is painful to watch. It's hard to buy John Malkovich's Valmont being in love with Madame de Tourvel. Glenn Close is hammy. Michelle Phieffer annoys the shit out of me.

LOVED A WOMAN?

Are we switching our tune? Because I was really looking forward to the YEAH YEAH YEAH YEAH YEAAAHHHHHHHHHHH part of steven's song.

Here at the Cresosote Institute of retroactive musical criticism, we endeavor to provide you with the finest time travelling services to prevent musical atrocities. Our current list of tasks includes:

The Aerosmith project

Billy Ray Cyrus Castration station

Kevin Federline leg breaking Rube Goldberg device

The Musketeer Massacre

The Woodstock re-zoning and enforcement initiative

Please feel free to contribute. You too can prevent Wavy Gravy.

Mrcreosote, you had me at "Kevin Federline leg breaking Rube Goldberg Device". You earned my undying love and devotion for D.A.R.E. to Prevent Wavy Gravy.

bug's life is just Seven Samurai with bugs.

Posted by: sean at April 6, 2011 11:42 AM

The Magnificent Seven is just Seven Samurai with cowboys.

Battle Beyond The Stars is just Seven Samurai with aliens and spaceships.

What's your point?

Deep Impact over Armageddon?

I see I'm gonna have to cut a bitch.

Gone with the Wind is just Seven Samurai without the Samurai or the same plot, but with dresses made of drapes! Although think about how badass Gone with the Wind would have been with Samurai. Let's get on that.

The Seventh Seal is just Seven Samurai with Chess pieces..
(Also, no actual seals.)

Se7en is just the Seven Samurai with two cops a serial killer and Gweyneth's head.

3 Ninjas: High Noon at Mega Mountain is just Seven Samurai with Hulk Hogan, Jim Varney, a mega mountain, and four less ninjas than samurai.

i can't decide between The Prestige and The Illusionist because one had Scarlett and the other had Jessica.

they had to choose them.

also volcano is the better choice, bc you get to watch John Carroll Lynch melt while saving some poor schmucks life on the subway.

I preferred Deep Impact, but agree with pretty much everything else...especially The Truman Show vs Ed TV.

I thought Ryan Phillipe did his best work in Cruel Intentions, and I enjoyed it a hell of a lot more than either Dangerous Liasons or Valmont. Malkovich is always just playing Malkovich.

No one ever remembers the *other* Robin Hood film that went up against Kevin Costner's.

Poor Patrick Bergin. Ya just weren't cut out for it.

(Bonus points for casting Uma Thurman as Maid Marion).

Seven Brides for Seven Brothers would be much improved if the brothers were samurai. And if the brides were Ninjas? PURE WIN

Wow, I love hard space science fiction, and you just reminded me of how dismally bad both of those Mars movies are. I mean, they were BADDD. I think the one with Gary Sinise is better, but if I hadn't seen the posters with names, I wouldn't even know which one that is.

Also, I have never ever ever heard of "The Wild" in my life...I may not have children and be up-to-date on allll the cute cheerful animated pics these days, but...what is that? Did Dreamworks royally beat Disney in this instance? Which one of them bombarded us with a movie about chihuahuas?