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I Appreciate Your Selfish Health and Vanity Concerns, Bro. But We Want the Fat Guy Back

By Dustin Rowles | Posted Under Seriously Random Lists | Comments (66)



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Jonah Hill

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Seth Rogen

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Drew Carey

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Peter Jackson

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Ummm, Anthony Anderson?

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Comments

Ooh...Al Roker. Please dude.

Posted by: Cindy at August 16, 2011 12:04 AM

Drew Carey looks like death.

Posted by: figgy at August 16, 2011 12:11 AM

God, Drew Carey looks awful! Losing weight has really aged his appearance... and what is with that hair??

Posted by: Lulu at August 16, 2011 12:15 AM

Carey looks like Anson Brown from the Food Network would look if he had cancer.

Posted by: Some Guy at August 16, 2011 12:20 AM

They always looked like that, you just couldn't tell for all the lard. Good for them.

Posted by: Lindsey with an 'e' at August 16, 2011 12:22 AM

You're an asshole, Dustin... you're an asshole.

Posted by: J. Warner at August 16, 2011 12:43 AM

Is Drew Carey wearing false teeth and wearing a wig?

Posted by: John G. at August 16, 2011 12:55 AM

Some of these guys still wearing their old oversized cloths or what?

Posted by: xl at August 16, 2011 1:02 AM

I honestly think the only one that actually looks better is Seth Rogan. And is that really Drew Carey or a cross between a skeleton and Alex Trebek?
In relation to health though, good on them.

Posted by: Samantha at August 16, 2011 1:09 AM

I honestly think the only one that actually looks better is Seth Rogan. And is that really Drew Carey or a cross between a skeleton and Alex Trebek?
In relation to health though, good on them.

Posted by: Samantha at August 16, 2011 1:09 AM

If it's any consolation, Peter Jackson is putting the weight back on.
You could do a similar lineup of formerly plump actresses, who got noticed playing a larger lass, who then used their pay cheque to hire trainers and dietitians to make them slim(er).
...and you forgot Ricky Gervais.

Posted by: Nick at August 16, 2011 1:31 AM

Skinny Jonah Hall looks like Frankie Muniz.

Posted by: Erika at August 16, 2011 1:55 AM

Ready for the bitterness? Okay, GO!

I love it how when male actors lose weight everyone is all, "Aw maaaannn! We liked you better chubby!" But when female actors do the same, the attitude seems to be: "Well, it's about time you got your act together!" (Not here, but on just about every other celebrity gossip site/tv show out there.)

Maybe because when the fat guys lose it, all that's left is a non-cuddly, ugly motherfucker.

Except Seth Rogen. Honestly, I think he's looking pretty good.

Posted by: Erin S at August 16, 2011 1:56 AM

>who then used their pay cheque to hire trainers and dietitians to make them slim(er).


... to make the slimer, eh? Who ya gonna call?

Posted by: StruckingFuggle at August 16, 2011 2:13 AM

Seth Rogan does look good, as does Jackson, all the rest look like death.

Posted by: Melody Be at August 16, 2011 2:41 AM

Erin S: Maybe because when the fat guys lose it, all that's left is a non-cuddly, ugly motherfucker.

Bwahaha, so true.

Posted by: Melody Be at August 16, 2011 2:43 AM

This list is just douchey. I hate Drew Carey as much as anyone with a sense of humor, but he doesn't deserve to die from being a fatass.

I don't know why you'd want fat any of these guys back. Especially Jonah Hill, he'd be dead in a decade if he kept that load on him.

Posted by: Devil Child at August 16, 2011 3:34 AM

Same goes for Alton Brown. I can't respect his foodspertice anymore, cause he looks all judgey about what he eats. Makin up words tumptiddy tumptiddy tump!

Posted by: AM at August 16, 2011 3:44 AM

Stephen Fry lost a huge amount of weight some time ago too. Honestly, it looked really unhealthy.

Posted by: Matthijs at August 16, 2011 4:05 AM

Horatio Sanz.

Posted by: Jerry at August 16, 2011 4:28 AM

Drew Carey indeed looks like death, but it's more the shitty game show host look he's got going on than his weight loss.

If it's any consolation, if you watch the Hobbit video blogs, Jackson's on his weigh to Bombur-size again.

Posted by: Protoguy at August 16, 2011 5:33 AM

Anthony Anderson has managed the task of losing all his body weight and apparently nothing from the face. How the fuck even?

Also, I did Rogen skinnier, he suits it more since it turns out he's kind of Old Hollywood handsome. But Jonah...YOU WHERE NEVER GOOD AND BEING SKINNY DOES NOT MAKE YOU GOOD. JUST BE AWAY.

Drew...oh Drew. he looks like an old lesbian.

Posted by: Nadine at August 16, 2011 6:46 AM

I think AA lost weight from his face. That's just the size of his head. (Not meant to be an insult. Just an observation.)

Peter Jackson looks like someone aged Dominic Monaughan about 20 years. A rough, coke-filled 20 years. (Not meant to imply coke use.)

Posted by: Socrates_Johnson at August 16, 2011 7:13 AM

Jonah Hill needs his trademark hair back, maybe the glasses. Too many changes at once, I think.

Posted by: snapnhiss at August 16, 2011 7:21 AM

They all look better. They just look different than we're used to.

Posted by: Mrs. Julien at August 16, 2011 8:04 AM

No matter how famous you are if you are a fat guy, you get more chicks being skinnier.

Posted by: Matt at August 16, 2011 8:28 AM

Socrates, that made me laugh more than it should, poor AA....how does he buy hats?!

Posted by: Nadine at August 16, 2011 8:38 AM

Rogen looks kinda good, if you ask me. But he wasn't always chubby, was he? I recall he was kinda cute on Undeclared.

Posted by: MelBivDevoe at August 16, 2011 8:46 AM

He buys ones with Velcro my dear. Velcro.

Posted by: Socrates_Johnson at August 16, 2011 9:02 AM

Socrates_Johnson, without your answers I'd be lost, adrift in a world of big heads and hat questions...your wisdom protects me. Also hates never stay on my head so I am SO buying some velcro strips.

Posted by: Nadine at August 16, 2011 9:07 AM

By the way Rogen, definitely looks good. Maybe we just needs time to adjust to the others as well. Except for Carey. I think he's just looking old.

Posted by: Socrates_Johnson at August 16, 2011 9:08 AM

Just don't velcro it to your hair. I wouldn't want to be responsible for any unfortunate mishaps.

Posted by: Socrates_Johnson at August 16, 2011 9:10 AM

Rogen looks far better.

Posted by: asdff at August 16, 2011 9:18 AM

Seth Rogan was never THAAAAAAT fat. He was fat, for sure, but I seem to remember him getting that way. Wasn't he a healthy looking weight in the 40 yr. Old Virgin? He was like Frat Fat whereas M. Hill was more of the Biggest Loser variety fat.Losing weight is hard ya'll! Good for all of them!

Posted by: Alexis at August 16, 2011 9:24 AM

On a side note, I do think that Rogan had plastic surgery to fix his underbite and I say more power to him.

Posted by: Mrs. Julien at August 16, 2011 9:41 AM

Erin S. - so fucking funny. And mean-spirited. But also funny. Oh, and true.

Posted by: samantha t at August 16, 2011 10:09 AM

Jonah looks like Gunther from the Luann comic strip.

Posted by: logan at August 16, 2011 10:17 AM

Jonah Hill will look better in a few months when his skin starts to tighten up around his neck. If it doesn't happen, he'll look fine once he's convinced that plastic surgery is the only option o that much loose hanging skin. He would, however, look much better with a slightly longer hairstyle. Some guys can't pull off the buzz cut. He's one of them.

Posted by: Robert at August 16, 2011 10:50 AM

Whomever said that we probably just need time to adjust to how they look now, is mostly right.

That being said, I think Jonah would look better with longer hair (as evidenced by the fact that he looks better in the second, thinner picture where his hair is a bit longer).

I think Seth looks great. He was always on the bigger side--even back in his Freaks and Geeks days--but I think he carried it well.

Poor Drew Carey is just one of those people who once they lose the weight, they look much, much older--and not in a good way. That still doesn't detract from the fact that it was a good move health-wise to lose the weight. I wonder if he took out his nipple ring too?

Peter Jackson just needs A DECENT FUCKING HAIRCUT. When he first lost the weight and got the lasik, I thought he looked like a blind & shrunken version of himself, but now I'm mostly used to it. But the hair, jesus christ, the hair! He has gazillions of dollars, he should be able to afford a good stylist!

And Anthony Anderson's face is thinner, he just has a large noggin. Not that there's anything wrong with that.

In any case, good for them that they were able to lose the weight. I'm sure they are happier for it and feel healthier. As someone else pointed out, losing weight is hard, so hats off to them for making it happen. And I hope they can keep it off, since they obviously worked so hard to lose it in the first place.

Posted by: tamatha at August 16, 2011 11:04 AM

No matter what his size, Jonah Hill will NEVER appeal to me.

Rogan, however, was pretty damn bangable after he lost the weight.

See also: Horatio Sanz

Posted by: Skyler Durden at August 16, 2011 11:05 AM

Weight loss isn't always a sign of health. Skinnier isn't always better. We have no idea HOW these guys lost weight, if it in fact it was a healthy approach, or a healthy pace. I actually resent the idea that fat = unhealthy and skinny = healthy. It's not actually true. Eating well and exercising doesn't necessarily make you smaller, while some diets actually make your health worse, not better. But fat = bad is why we have so many people literally dying to be thin. Bah. Ignorance.

Posted by: TheHobo at August 16, 2011 11:10 AM

TheHobo - You make a good point.

Posted by: tamatha at August 16, 2011 11:17 AM

Yes, there's been a rumor for several years that Rogen used coke to lose all that weight. That's one of those "not-so-healthy" ways.

Posted by: Internet Magpie at August 16, 2011 11:29 AM

Am I alone in not being able to bear Seth Rogen's speaking voice?

Posted by: samantha t at August 16, 2011 12:04 PM

Man, Jonah Hill lost a LOT of weight. That's like, 75 pounds from the looks of it. That second picture even looks like he's borrowing Michael Cera's clothes.

I have to say, I don't believe the rumours of Rogen doing coke. He seems too laid back to want that kind of high, even if it resulted in massive weight loss.

Posted by: Bert at August 16, 2011 12:10 PM

Samantha- no, you are not alone.

All I can hear is that weird laugh of his or some version of Jason Segel speaking.

Posted by: quirk at August 16, 2011 12:32 PM

Chris Farley has also lost a bunch of weight.

Posted by: dagnabbit at August 16, 2011 12:42 PM

Good for them. Ive been struggling with my weight my whole life. Its not just about eating less and excersising, believe me. It's hard as fuck to lose weight. Plus you have to keep it off which is even harder to do than lose it. It is always inspiring to me when a Chub loses weight.

Posted by: junierizzle at August 16, 2011 1:44 PM

Really the most off-putting thing about most of these is how sickly they look. I think in Hill's case especially, the weight came off way too fast (and yeah, I will imply coke use here since I've seen it before in people I know.) His color just doesn't look good and the loose skin makes him look really sallow. Jackson doesn't freak me out too bad since the first I ever saw of him was in Dead Alive and bad Taste and he was fairly thin back then. Tamatha is right though, dude needs to spruce it up a bit. I think Rogen looks best because his weight loss is happening at a reasonable rate and he just looks healthier. I'm gonna go ahead and cut Carey some slack here since, even though I find his appearance unsettling, he did lose the weight to help off-set his diabetes. Maybe he just needs some new suits already.

@dagnabbit - Hat tip to you. Simple, subtle and nicely timed!

Posted by: E the B at August 16, 2011 1:47 PM

wtf?! is Drew Carey turning into Larry King?

Posted by: Sara Tonin at August 16, 2011 2:18 PM

also, @Erin S - the difference between fat men and women in Hollywood is that the fat men START fat. The fat actresses started skinny and the committed the capital crime of GETTING fat. That's what makes it "acceptable" to judge them.

Posted by: Sara Tonin at August 16, 2011 2:34 PM

Drew Carey looks like a really old Neil Patrick Harris.

Posted by: Sad Rockstar at August 16, 2011 7:16 PM

Maybe it's that these are just not attractive men. I don't think they look more attractive with more weight, they just look less gaunt. Rogen is the exception, he's not bad looking and is well-proportioned (so doesn't have a big head on a teensy body).

Posted by: jzhz at August 16, 2011 8:15 PM

He's BRICKTOP!

Holy Shit, skinny Drew Carey played Bricktop in Snatch. At least I think that's who played him. Here's another snap ...

http://www.totalfilm.com/features/100-greatest-movie-villains/brick-top-1

Posted by: Johnnyboy at August 16, 2011 9:09 PM

I'd have coffee with Seth Rogen any day, whether he be thin, chubby, reeking of week old bong water, etc. I saw a snap of him wearing a Jewbacca shirt one day and just fell in love.

Then again, I made the statement the other day that I wanted to marry the closest approximation to an amalgam of Clive Owen, Colin Firth/Mark Darcy, Sam Vimes, and Moist VonLipwig that exists on Earth. So obviously I'm off my nut and shouldn't be allowed access to sharp objects and/or blog forums.

Posted by: hexadaisical at August 16, 2011 9:54 PM

Ah, the arbitrary tyranny of appearances. There's "I'm getting healthy" thin, then there's "I'm dying from level 4 cancer" thin.

Posted by: Mr. stitch at August 16, 2011 10:32 PM

Seth Rogen looks amazing. What the fuck is he doing on this list? I'd have him any style, be in goateed and tatted up like in 40-Year-Old Virgin or looking "like a beluga whale," as his character said , in Zack and Miri Make a Porno. idgaf. He looks like he would lay a girl down right for some good fun.

Posted by: duckandcover at August 17, 2011 1:41 AM

While it is true that skinny does not always mean healthy, the obverse is not a given. Extra weight may be "OK", in a socially acceptable, everyone's ok kinda happy feel good sense, but in general, overweight IS unhealthy. Being overweight puts strain on the body's functions. There is some wiggle roon as far as what exactly overweight is, but someone like Jonah Hill - that's not healthy in any sense. The whole PC acceptance of overweight because we're a culture of gluttons is doing a disservice to us all.

Posted by: Protoguy at August 17, 2011 1:44 AM

As an addendum (I was wondering when I would do one of these again), the only one who looks healthy is Rogen, all my loin lust for him aside. Everyone else looks like they went on a meth bender to lose their weight. The only reason Drew Carey looks put together is because that old lesbian knows how to blend his foundation properly (srsly, wtf).

Posted by: duckandcover at August 17, 2011 1:45 AM

Rogan's good. Hill looks good in that suit, but the face will take a little getting used to. Jackson looks okay. Anderson looks fuckin' strange, but I think that might just be that picture/suit that's making him look that way. Carey really does look a lot older skinny; he's the only one that I agree with you about.

Posted by: Rumble-dee-hump at August 17, 2011 6:50 PM

I think the producers of the Price is Right transferred Bob Barker's soul into Drew Carey's body and now the universe won't accept it, so it's turning Drew Carey into Bob Barker. That's the only way I can figure it.

Posted by: This F***ing Guy at August 18, 2011 2:04 AM

I wonder if Neil Patrick Harris sees skinny Drew Carey and knows that's what he'll look like when he's in his 50s.

Posted by: chriso at August 21, 2011 12:08 AM

Except for Seth who said he went on a diet and got a personal trainer to lose his weight for the Green Hornet, I'm thinking all the other guys either had gastric bypass surgery or did a boat-load of meth. Coke makes you fat people...

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Posted by: Portia Canul at August 24, 2011 7:43 AM

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Posted by: weight loss at September 16, 2011 12:24 PM

October 5th is Clive Barkers Birthday and I just want to give him all the love he deserves. Happy Birthday Clive!!!

Posted by: Harvey Hiatt at October 5, 2011 5:38 PM