Pajiba

Saw the Cure live twice in the 80's. Worst live band ever.

primus wouldn't be primus without the gurgly drunken cartoony voice. it would be like the dead kennedy's without the hoarse old auntie voice of Mr. Biafra.

Every time I hear a new song from The National, I get super excited, because they're energetic and creative musicians. The second he starts singing, I want to saw my ears off with rusty razorblades. Way to take one of the most exciting bands in indie and turn them into one of the most boring bands of all time. You're a legend.

How about Geddy Lee from Rush? I love Rush (no, I'm not as old as that sounds) but I admit his voice is not beautimous.

Cindy, no matter how "shaky, whiny and grating" Robert Smith's voice ever got I could never hate on the man just for his renditions of "Pictures of You," "Just Like Heaven," "Lullaby," and "Boys Don't Cry."

Therefore, I must point out that your criticisms are near blasphemous and I am pondering possibly throwing a p*ssy-fit to rival Kevin Smith's recent Twitter tantrum.

On second thought, I don't think I'll have to, what with Jay's blatant threats of a pyrotechnics show at your abode.

In a very tiny voice I will whisper that I can't stand Robert Plant's voice.

Jimi Hendrix Experience - incredible music, some great songs, I can listen to them endlessly but the guy wasn't really a singer.

On the other hand he wasn't grating like, say, Axl Rose, or modern day Bob Dylan.

pickled tink hit on right on the nose - Geddy Lee. The man's voice is my own personal "nails on a chalkboard" - I cannot STAND the sound of his voice.

Has anyone mentioned Trent Reznor?
His instrumental stuff is the fuckin' BOOBS, but I ain't a fan of his voice.
"Dead Souls" is one of my favorite NIN songs (because I love the percussion and my first exposure to the song was a midi file (which I still have) embedded in a webpage circa 1998), but I would kill to have an instrumental mp3 version.

I can't stand Axl Rose's voice. It's so incredibly nasal and irritating.
G n'R's cover of Knockin' On Heaven's Door is a fucking abomination because of Axl's voice. However, I must point out that I love Bob Dylan, and I know how some people feel about his singing...so take my opinion for what it's worth, G n' R fans.

You know, oddly enough (despite being a fan of The Cure) I was with you until Axl Rose. I get what you're saying, but the fact of the matter is that you have to actually have a good voice in order to use it the way he does. Those of you who think Morrissey doesn't have a good voice are also smoking crack. Pure mellifluousity.

I think the point here is that there's a difference between not liking someone's voice and their not having a good one. For instance: I am forced to admit that individuals like Josh Groban and Charlotte Church have decent instruments, regardless of the fact that their singing makes me want to punch them in the face.

I would've gone for Axl Rose, which is where everyone should stick their midnight shank (no, that's not a phallic euphemism; I literally mean a shank, at midnight), but Les Claypool has always made me rage in some form. Primus = great music, the singer .. fuuuuuu. Can't blame his creativity, though; the man gave us the Robot Chicken and South Park theme songs. Catchy as hell.

Y'all people saying Morrissey can't sing are clearly forked in the head. I can see people not liking his style of music, particular songs or back up bands, but the man has a gorgeous voice and he's not bad to look at either.

I don't get the Robert Smith criticisms, the Cure are super ridiculous and melodramatic, that's the appeal, it's not like his voice is inappropriate, it fits perfectly. Same with Moz.

I saw The Cure in 04 and it was a very good concert. And I have never owned a Cure record.

I think this post misses what rock and roll is supposed to be about - DIY. And Lydon kind of reinvented rock singing. That said, the dude that sings lead for The Sword is kinda bad.

I'd argue that Peter Garrett was perfect for Midnight Oil, which made one righteously terrific record and at least one other damn good one. His was a voice filled with venom and wonderment.

I concur with the esteemed punctuation mark.

How about a list that flips this - great singers to shitty bands?

Peter Garrett is a national treasure!

Morrissey has one of the best voices in music, some of you people have horrible taste.

I spent new years' eve moving, then rushed out to get to work this morning. Turns out the store is closed for the holiday, but they accidentally put on my schedule that I was supposed to come in. Fuck my hour commute.

I would kill that bitch from Evanescence with at least three javelins and a wolverine for ruining a great portion of the 2000s with her caterwauling bitchfest diatribes.

Also, one of the worst singers of all time is the guy from the band Live. He sounds exactly like when South Park makes fun of hard rock singers. He sounds like a parody of himself.

However, he's automatically disqualified from this list because Live is terrible.

Yeah, hi, long-time reader, first-time poster here. I disagree with a couple of points on this list, but I'm mostly writing to ask a favor.

In this new year (have a happy one, everybody, btw), could you ALL please kill usage of the word Godtopus from your posts? Contributors and commentators alike, PLEASE. It's just such a stupid word, seriously. And I've thought so for the longest time, hoping I could one day read the articles and comments and enjoy them without the invocation of a fictitious, all-knowing, all-seeing cephalopod, but enough is enough. And my God, is Cindy actually trying to bring variations on this made-up word into the vocabulary around here? Lordtopus? Jesopus? COME OOOOONNNNNNN...this site prides itself on eloquence and intelligence, and I've seen plenty of both on display here many, many times, and it's STILL considered cool and funny to pepper posts with a dunbass word like Godtopus? Wasn't this word supposed to be retired anyway?

Completely off-topic, I know, and I'm really not trying to start a fight here, I'm just a lurker and a guest. But damn, people, sound this word out quietly in your minds and wonder why it was ever popular.

Godtopus does not approve.

Do we go to YOUR place of worship and tell you to not 'Hail Satan'?
No. I think not.
Good day, sir.
I SAID GOOD DAY!!!!
Oh, and Godtopus, GODTOPUS, GODTOPUS!!!

Humperdink?

Imhotep?

McCloud!

Checking back, I can see that my sincere request wasn't taken all that seriously, but that's fine. I mentioned that I've seen eloquence and intelligence on display here. Courtesy? Not so much.

Oh, and Lindsey with an 'e', a couple of things. I hope this site isn't your true place of worship. If it is, then your problems are WAY bigger than using a stupid, made-up word. And I don't worship Satan, wouldn't in this or any other lifetime. I believe in one God only (although my belief isn't what's providing the impetus behind my first post). I mean, I'm aware that you could be totally joking with me and your reply is sort of a hazing for the newbie. After all, I said I didn't come here and post to start a fight.

And no ma'am. GOOD DAY TO YOU!!!

Godtopus isn't a "dumbass word", it's a name for a one-eyed blue octopus deity who is at least as reasonable a proposition as the whitebearded sky wizard that some people have chosen to worship.

You may not like Godtopus, and that's fine. But a lot of people around here, who you admit are eloquent and intelligent, find Godtopus amusing. So, he/she/it's not going away.

Sorry.

Godtopus IS INDEED a dumbass word, MM. It doesn't exist in any dictionaries I know of, isn't used in everyday language (although I'd love to see the looks on the faces of the people YOU say this to who aren't familiar with Pajiba and this site's fascination with the word) and no, I'm sorry, but it's the furthest thing from being a reasonable proposition to anyone whose brain isn't wired to follow the latest fad. Do YOU go to a church or attend services that's centered on an octopus? Is there a holy text of some kind you read and follow the tenets of in this church? What would one of those tenets be, Thou Shall Not Partake of Calamari? I've seen evidence of a true God move in my life, in people, and in nature. Tell me, have you ever seen it rain ink? Please, MM, you're trying too hard.

The very fact that I admit that I find people eloquent and smart is precisely why I'm asking this word be put to rest. I remember a column that focused on words that needed to forgotten about, and this one came up. But I'll bite, what's so "amusing" about Godtopus in your lives here beyond it being a mascot that once appeared on t-shirts that HAD to be produced by Pajibans?

Just one more comment before I go for the day...Cindy, really, no disrespect is meant. And trust me, I'm not trying to be a stick-in-the-mud about this...I already know the word will still be used, that people find it funny (after it's been used for the millionth time going on, what, two or three years now, I don't know why) and that no one at all has to do what I ask. That's all well and good, but I was JUST ASKING. I've enjoyed this site for just as long, and will continue to do so. But every time I'm bopping along down the comments laughing and pausing to think at the things I see written down I inevitably run into the word godtopus and my enjoyment comes to a complete screeching stop. Use of the word, its clumsy syntax and dumb meaning, is nails-on-a-chalkboard to my eyes. And hey, haven't you defenders, at one time or another, railed against a person, occurrence, TV, or film or series of films whose success didn't make sense to you? What I'm doing differently is...exactly what? Oh, yeah, that's right, directing your own criticisms back at you in a roundabout way. That's not allowed, huh.

Again, not looking for a fight when I already know the outcome, which will from here on out be INCREASED usage of godtopus around here. Just...really, ladies and gentlemen. Godtopus? Going into either its third or fourth year on this site as a name that people still laugh over when it's used? Seriously?

p.s. and I'm totally sure that Lindsey is a fine woman, and I write this with complete sincerity.

Flying Spaghetti Monster...he bears more than a passing resemblance to our blessed Godtopus.

Ex-Pat, we are, most generally, a very non-denominational bunch around here. We do have those who attend church regularly and believe in whatever they choose to believe in...BUT..a lot of us DO NOT. We are NOT slaves to "fads" or "trends," but are merely skeptical about grandpa in the sky. I have NOT seen proof of any divine power in my experience. I think a lot of folks here have not either.

We are merely having fun. If you don't approve of how we have fun, you do not have to participate. WE do NOT try to brainwash anyone into our ways of thinking, nor do we attack them for their beliefs, or lack thereof.

Lighten up, Francis.

Dammit, I said I was leaving, and I will, but I wanted to respectfully respond to the last posts I saw after I posted to Freddy.

thatstrangewoman - You don't give a crap about what I have to say, but yet, you took the time to post to let everyone know you don't care? Uuuuuhhhhhh...sure. I disagree with you about being a troll, too. In my online experiences a troll merely shows up in a thread to start fights and slam others verbally. Now, it's clear you don't me or any of my views, but when it comes to being online, I try to treat every message board and discussion as if I were in the room with the people I'm "speaking" with and as if I were in someone else's house, as well. Respect is paid all around, because I like to be given respect. So no, ma'am, I'm not a troll.

dammitjanet - Again, I didn't raise this issue with the word because it offended my personal beliefs. Plus, I'm sure God has a sense of humor, so if it's cool up there then it's cool with me. All I was saying was...look, come on, New Year, "I'll be in my bunk" was (mostly) retired and so were a few other words and phrases, why not this one when it's such a speed bump to the comments it appears in? It's still around, so the argument that you're not slaves to fads and trends is argumentative. Some things just need to be put out to pasture after their expiration date. Do people laugh when you say it when you're in their company?

It's not about IF I approve of how you have fun here. We're all adults, and what you do is your business. Do you really think I'll lose sleep over this or halt the things I've got going on in my life? And I WASN'T participating, Janet. You DID see the part where I mentioned I was a long-time lurker, didn't you? I'm not trying to brainwash anyone into my way of thinking, and if you think this post was an attack by me, well, clearly you've never seen me really upset by something.

And you haven't seen any proof of any divine power, is that right? Your friends, family, the good in your life, those things aren't evidence of a divine power to you? You know, I'd really seriously like to have a talk with you about that.

And you may call me Nathan if you wish. Francis is my goldfish.

Oh, unleash away, Maggi. I think Led Zeppelin is fabulous, and Bron-Y-Aur Stomp is probably in my top ten of favorite songs ever. I just don't like Plant's voice for anything other than straight up singing. His caterwauling scream rivals Geddy Lee's voice... and I say that as a fan of Rush. (Amazing live show, highly recommended.) I'm just one of those weirdos who is generally able to step back and be impartial even when I am a fan of someone or something. I can see the flaws and acknowledge.

Ex-Pat, I know you may be gone by now, but I am not trying to be argumentative. Its a word. It's not a speed bump. Yes, some people still laugh when I use it. Of course, 90% of the people in my "real" life have no idea what I'm talking about. I really only use it here, and on Facebook.

No, all the good things in my life..friends, family, etc...were not gifted to me by some invisible power. They are "miraculous" to be sure, but no magical being gifted them to me.

Except, maybe, the unicorns.

Geoff Tate.

...I don't know why I know that....

Sooo, is this a bad time to declare my fealty to the Elder Gods, the greatness that is Cuthulu and the King in Yellow?

you don't need to believe in Godtopus; Godtopus believes in you.

I hate to break it to you Big Daddy (,)
But I was almost ALWAYS fully clothed whilst crocheting the Holy Godtopi. Almost.

Geddy Lee?! Does your blasphemy know no bounds?!

I would be the first to admit that Geddy Lee's vocal style is not for everyone. For many Rush fans, however, his singing style has been a key element in their music; a feature and not a bug. That said, he is into his fifties now and he just can't hit those high notes anymore; most of the time he's not even in the proverbial ball park (see Rush's fabled live performance on The Colbert Report, for example). The band as a whole can still rock and they play like motherfuckers, but they really need to do something about the vocals. Hire a stunt Geddy, perhaps?

Actually, I thought making frivolous remarks about an admittedly imaginary "deity" would, in general, cause less hard feelings than frivolous remarks about a deity that people actually worship. If everywhere people have used "Godtopus", they had used "Jesus" or "Allah" instead, would that have been better?

you don't need to believe in Godtopus; Godtopus believes in you.
Posted by: idleprimate at January 1, 2011 7:32 PM

If only Godtopus was in the televangelical business. I would allow It to swindle me for all my money.

Oh man if that's your example of a bad Coheed vocal then there's no arguments to be made. I couldn't even deal with them until that album came out; the first two are just murder on the ears when he sings. He's just been getting progressively less screechy. But, I'll second on the Axl Rose apologism; you really can't sing like that without having a good instrument. I can't stand Axl except on one or two songs, but I respect him as a singer.
Posted by: Ian at December 31, 2010 9:06 PM

I think it's one of the better examples. "Welcome Home" has the baddest of all bad-ass intros (in before SRL idea), and then BAM. You're left flaccid and wanting when those vocals kick in. You can't imagine my disappointment when I found "that song from the 9 trailer," just to be served that dish. I would cite the other albums or songs from C&C, but "A Favor House Atlantic" was on constant replay in the official Teenage DaC car parties of the early 2000s.

Another vote for (or against) Geddy Lee.

I was such a huge Coheed and Cambria fan in high school (I wrote a 9-page research paper in AP English 11 about the literary roots and personal history of Claudio Sanchez's storyline. I got an A), and even though I'm a mostly grown adult (and a semi-professional music critic), and even though you're all probably right, I've always had a huge soft spot in my heart for that man's voice. I just love that he's willing to do crazy shit with it, especially on the early albums, where he switches from his full blast wail to a child's whisper in a snap, all for the sake of his ridiculous storyline.

God. Losing so many hipster points for this. I'll have to give my Dylan shades back to Ragstock.

what if it is the bet band because of the worst singer?

I'm talking about Olga from the Toy Dolls

But sometimes it's more of an unstoppable spontaneous hatred for a singer's voice instead of a Best Bands/Worst Singers dichotomy, isn't it?

For instance: My boyfriend, who has rather good taste and an education in music, dry heaves at the sound of Colin Meloy of The Decemberists. I am to this day baffled. It isn't the music he dislikes-- he just finds his voice utterly grating.

Doesn't stop me from playing The Crane Wife on repeat, but is always disconcerting.

Thanks, Cindy! I'm looking forward to introducing her to the plethora of music that Mr. Stardust and I enjoy, bad singers and all. John Lydon is indeed a terrible singer, but like Mick Jagger his charisma pulls him through.

Steve Perry's voice is terrible, but Journey also is a terrible band.

I'm not really a fan of David Mustaine's voice.

I also cannot listen to Coheed & Cambria because that guy's voice is the worst thing ever

On the topic of singers with terrible voices...I haven't heard much from Primus or PIL, but to me, Peter Garrett's voice served the "Beds Are Burning" track very well, and while Billy Corgan's voice tends to grate, I couldn't imagine anyone else laying down the vocals to "The Beginning is The End is The Beginning", "The End is The Beginning is The End", "Bullet with Butterfly Wings", and "Ava Adore". On all those tracks, he sings with just the right amounts of melody and anger, and "The End is..." just flat-out rocks. Monte X., if you haven't heard Kiedis on "The Zephyr Song" yet, check it out and see if you have the same opinion on whether or not he sounds tone-deaf on all the Chili Pepper songs. As for Robert Smith, my love for The Cure's music and his singing prompted me to purchase "Disintegration" from iTunes, it's the first full album to show up as such on my iPod.

MM - making it rain vs. predicting the winners of soccer matches? One of these things is not quite like the other, my friend. That shit was rigged, anyway.

I apologize for derailing the thread. But just so you know, the phrase "all-knowing, all-seeing cephalopod" has already been trademarked, and its use here on the site comes with financial responsibilities. Don't send me any money, though, just donate to your local animal shelters.

Dave Mustaine looks and sounds like that nasally mosquito-boy stoner in junior high who wanted sooo bad to be a hardass rocker when he grew up but still sucked. Something to be said for tenacity I guess. I used to like The Red Hot Chili Peppers but they've sucked ass since BSSM and it became the Keidis/Flea show. Now I cringe everytime I hear the bastard's lisp.

Big RUSH fan. Fully admit Geddy sucks.

I don't care how great a songwriter Neil Young is, he sucks.

Ditto for Dylan.

Don't care.

Suck.

Seriously, who else but Les Claypool is going to sing "Too Many Puppies"?