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Steven Spielberg Has Been Outed as the Sport-Hunting, Triceratops-Killing Monster He Is

By Vivian Kane | Miscellaneous | July 10, 2014 | Comments ()


spielberg_monster.png


It’s pretty widely accepted that the worst person on the the entire internet right now is that terrible Texan cheerleader who’s gotten famous off of killing endangered animals and posing with them while being blonde. Seriously, if you’re looking for a way to get famous quick, that’s probably your best option.

A man named Jay Branscomb posted a (satirical) response on Facebook, outing that damn Spielberg for his monstrous ways.

i-dont-care-who-he-is.jpg

If you can’t read it, that caption says,

Disgraceful photo of recreational hunter happily posing next to a Triceratops he just slaughtered. Please share so the world can name and shame this despicable man.

And shame they did. Some commenters got really, REALLY upset at the “uneducated” hunter’s lack of knowledge surrounding the species he hunts. Cause dinosaurs are, like, important, you know? Cause of ecosystems.

idontcarewhoheisdfgfgfg.JPG

inhumane-prick2.jpg

Because if there’s one thing we know about internet rage, it is that it is truly blind.

Via LAist. Photos via Dangerous Minds.



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Comments Are Welcome, Jerks Will Be Banned


  • Mike

    Well after decades of the MSM (Mainly Socialist Media) giving idiot leftists all the cover they needed, now the web comes along and it is like a daily game of Whack-O-liberal-Mole.

    Knee Jerk does not even come close to the lightning speed some of these people expose themselves and their idiot beliefs.

  • bbmcrae

    Now THAT'S some funny satirical writing! Well done, good sir! Hilarious how you made yourself sound both paranoid AND smug about things you're imagining! Huzzah!

  • Frankie Hazard

    just saying that blonde chick "killing" endangered animals actually wasn't killing. Shes apart of a tranquilizer tag program where they shoot the animals with tranquilizers and tag them for population counts get your facts straight

  • GoDogGo

    Uhhhhh, you might want to check your tin foil hat. She proudly boasting about shooting 'em with bullets.

  • she shot some, yes but not all. But the big cat was tranq'd.

  • tarqueeny

    If only dinosaurs were still around to gobble up stupid people...

  • flypaper

    I'm with Jerce on this one.

  • mairimba

    Sooo.. I shared this post on my facebook last night and a friend messaged me saying she was DYING, cause that long comment up there was made by one of her facebook friends. No, I'm not telling you who.

  • Scott Keith

    Poe's Law...

  • Life finds a wa...

    /blasts triceratops in the face with an elephant gun

  • KC

    As we say in the south "Awwwe. Bless your heart!"

  • JoeK

    That triceratops wasn't dead! He was just sick from eating some bad plants! I bet Nedry's behind this.

  • stella

    Well as long as he doesnt waste any of it, I dont see the problem.

  • Quatermain

    I think that 'the worst person on the Internet' is foolish hyperbole in general, and especially so applied here, but if we're going to tabulate that up I think Kendall Jones might have been edged out by this guy: http://www.examiner.com/articl...

  • emmalita

    I don't understand why people think the appropriate response to someone being terrible is to be terrible to them in a different way. Humiliation through attempted slut shaming is not the appropriate response to someone being cavalier about the lives of endangered species.

  • NateMan

    Yes. I've got all sorts of things to say about Ms. Jones, many of which are not fit for public consumption. Absolutely none of them have to do with her body.

  • Chrispeare

    Come on. These people can't be real.

  • mkawia

    this should be the test before voting . Put up of these in voting booth

  • NateMan

    As much as I enjoy and support hunting, I loathe this woman. She is the kind of ridiculous trophy hunter who gives the rest of us a bad name. Only hunt things with sizable, sustainable populations. Only hunt things you're willing and in fact eager to eat - or predators taking your stock, I suppose. The notion of flying all over the world on your parents' dime to slaughter animals with trackers and beaters is anathema to true hunting.

  • JustOP

    I don't know too much about this woman - but I read somewhere that these animals were being hunted in an area with cattle that's frequently killed by these predators and thus causing losses to the farmers. Doesn't that offer some justification?

  • NateMan

    If I believed it, it'd be a little of an excuse, I suppose, but I don't. That's usually an excuse for ranches to put on what are essentially canned hunts.

  • Berry

    I've never understood the hunters in my extended family who will happily kill all sorts of creatures but will only eat meat if it comes prepackaged from a grocery store. But on the other hand, my immediate family used to reap the benefits: the rabbits, birds, etc. they wouldn't eat themselves and gave to us instead were delicious.

  • PDamian

    Too true. I've never been a hunter, and folks in my family tend to fish, not shoot stuff (most of them live on the CA coast). But I've been living in central MN for a few years now, in a place where just about everyone hunts, fishes and/or traps to put food on the table. My morning drive to work takes me past at least three different places that'll dress and process your kill for a fee, and I've been offered haunches of venison by my students at the end of the semester as thanks for an interesting course (an extremely high compliment of my teaching, given that the offerings come after the grades are in, and sometimes from C students). I constantly hear about the "sins" of waste of meat and not eating what you catch or shoot, and how trophy hunters aren't worth spit (I'm pretty sure my students use a different word when they think I'm not listening). They'd find this silly young thing appalling.

    PS Never, never refer to the venison your students give you as "Bambi-burgers." Some of your coworkers might find you appalling. Sorry.

  • F'mal DeHyde

    There's a local place called "Dave's Grill - you kill it, we grill it." I have a mental image of roadkill armadillo every time I drive past.

  • Berry

    In Northern Finland, where I spent a large part of my childhood, eating reindeer is perfectly normal, and my family used to do that a lot. So, when my aunt, who has lived in the US for decades, came to visit, she would of course be offered all kinds of reindeer delicacies. She told us that she always teased her coworkers about "going to eat Rudolf" before her trips. Apparently, they did not find that amusing.

    Also, if anyone ever offers you reindeer sausage, try to decline politely. It's disgusting. Everything else made from them can be wonderful, but not sausage.

  • NateMan

    Really? I've had it before and enjoyed it. I think it's a lot like venison sausage though, in that it's so strongly flavored and often so dry that a little bit goes a long way.

  • Berry

    The kind we had when I was a kid was awful. And we got it cheap, so there was always plenty to go around, which somehow made it worse.

  • My favorite butcher shop has a door on the side. Above it is spray painted "Drop Deer Here" to distinguish it from the back door, where livestock is delivered.

    When my husband was a Schwan's man, he would have customers give him venison - and elk, once - because they needed room in their freezer for the processed crap he was selling.

    Yep, I live in the hinterland.

  • emmalita

    Are we sure they weren't joking?

  • lonolove

    A friend posted this picture on Facebook and I wrote something to the effect of "That must cost a fortune to have mounted/taxidermy'd"...but then it just gave me anxiety because I thought other people reading it might think I was in earnest. OH GOD! Has sarcasm gone too far!? (Obviously not, but I worry sometimes that I'm so sarcastic that people mistake me for a moron.)

  • emmalita

    I have been mistaken for a moron while being sarcastic. Since I can't stop the sarcasm, I accept the scorn.

  • AvaLehra

    Once I referred to someone as "Klassy with a K" and later someone else that was nearby commented that someone should tell me it is spelled with a "C". O.o

  • emmalita

    That person was very smrt.

  • L.O.V.E.

    The age old question: is it better to be mistaken for a moron when being sarcastic or better to be mistaken as sarcastic when being a moron?
    Yes.

  • lonolove

    Sound choice. I salute you.

  • susie derkins

    Pretty sure that the comment saying "he should not have shot that animal" is a pun

  • L.O.V.E.

    He should not have shot that animal with a gun.
    He should not have that shot that animal for fun.

    He should not have shot Indiana Jones-Crystal Skull.
    He should not not shot George Lucas in a bathroom stall.

  • emmalita

    Or a Dr. Seuss homage.

  • Jenn TheYellowDart

    That long diatribe that is pasted over the picture seems to be pretty sincere and without a shred of satire...

  • mairimba

    I posted this above, but that comment was made by a friend of a friend. She was complaining on facebook afterwards that people were giving her shit for a comment she had made a while ago. My friend was dying!

  • emmalita

    I just hate the idea of a person literate enough to type a rant in the comments section (setting the bar low) doesn't know that dinosaurs are extinct. Please, World. Please don't be that stupid.

    *gives up all hope for humanity*
    **dies**

  • Valhallaback Girl

    That was a wild ride from start to finish.

  • Green_Eggs_and_Hamster

    Assuming it was not faked, then clearly the writer is an idiot. Instead of giving up all hop eon humanity though, I prefer to think that he or she simply assumed the picture was a rhinoceros, didn't look that closely at it, and descended into a rant filled nether world. They probably know that dinosaurs are extinct, and if they had actually looked at it for more than 3 seconds before activating there rage cannon, then they wouldn't seem like such a damn fool to the rest of us now. Unfortunately, many people are idiots.

  • Fabius_Maximus

    Technically, dinosaurs are not extinct. The remaining ones just learned to fly.

  • emmalita

    You with your facts and information.

  • Fabius_Maximus

    Sorry, I can't help myself sometimes.

  • emmalita

    I like it.

  • Fabius_Maximus

    That's a relief.

  • God Of Bal-Sagoth

    There's no such thing as dinosaurs, dummy.

  • emmalita

    Everyone knows they're dragons.

  • AvaLehra

    Behold! Our sad, sad (not-so-distant) future: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt03...

  • emmalita

    I've never seen Idiocracy. I should. I like Mike Judge.

  • Danar the Barbarian

    Highly underrated, eerily prescient, and incredibly quotable. Recommend.

  • BlackRabbit

    I'm Not Sure.

  • PDamian

    Please don't die, emmalita! We're having tri-tip burgers for dinner!

  • Ghost of emmalita

    *adds PDamian to the list of people to haunt for daring to turn a majestic creature like a triceratops into a burger.*

  • BlackRabbit

    *Humanity poses with emmalita's corpse triumphantly*

  • Ghost of emmalita

    Humanity better be a toothy blonde or I will haunt humanity for all eternity!

  • BlackRabbit

    *Buys tickets for John Edwards' show to talk to emmalita*

  • Jenn TheYellowDart

    *posts incoherent rant against BlackRabbit for being a disgusting human being without a shred of irony or satire*

  • BlackRabbit

    *Carefully points out all of the myriad spelling errors in Jenn's rant and tearfully compares her to the Nazis for picking on humanity*

  • Jenn TheYellowDart

    *sings The Circle of Life*

  • Hasen Klub

    The commenters? I suppose there's always the possibility. However, it seems that the internet does not know any sort of boundary when it comes to stupidity. You cannot contain it, control it, or stop it from breeding. Stupid Life finds a way...

  • Benny Gesserit

    So many triceratops, so few recipes.

  • This is why we can't have nice things.

  • nolarkinsley

    my classmate's aunt makes $68 every hour on the
    computer . She has been fired for 7 months but last month her paycheck was
    $15495 just working on the computer for a few hours. visit the site C­a­s­h­f­i­g­.­C­O­M­

  • Loanhighknight

    Nice try, Dustin.

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