I Bestow To You This Gift On the Greatest Day of the Year
One random day in November each year, we here at Pajiba celebrate the most glorious word in the English language. It's an annual tradition here dating back to the days before Pushing Daisies was cancelled, to the days when Ted and Victoria's relationship meant something on How I Met Your Mother. W. was still in office, but Stephen Colbert was running to capture the presidency. Britney had no hair. People still knew who Isaiah Washington was. "The Sopranos" aired its finale.
They were quieter times. Happier times. In the intervening years, however, I feel like many of us have taken our favorite word for granted. We don't use it like we once did. Is the magic gone? Have we lost touch with that once great word?
It's time to reconnect. To bond with our favorite word again. It's not good enough anymore that we simply type it out for the world to see. WE MUST SHOUT IT. WE MUST SING IT. WE MUST SHARE IT WITH THE WORLD.
Welcome to Butthole Day 2012, the day that I lost my last shred of dignity. Will Matt Zoller Seitz do that for you? Peter Sciretta? Alan Sepinwall? Alyssa Rosenberg? No. Only I will humiliate myself for the education of our readers on this, the sacred day of butt.
Let it rip, folks. In the comments. On the social media. In your offices. In the streets of Manhattan. Of Little Rock. Of Topeka, and Tulsa, and Los Angeles, and Ottawa. Shout It: Buuuuuuuuuuttttttthooooooooooole!
Get out there and kick some butthole.
Butthole Day is the shit.