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"Beef Stew Fart In Face Stories": 24 Hours Of Pajiba Readers' Google Inquiries

By Rebecca Pahle | Miscellaneous | November 9, 2015 | Comments ()

By Rebecca Pahle | Miscellaneous | November 9, 2015 |


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A largely unknown treat about website analytics (stay with me here) is that they let you see what search terms are leading people to a site. A lot of those are completely normal: “netflix best movies 2015,” “true detective who the hell is stan,” “the walking dead is [Is this still a spoiler? I don’t think it is.] really dead,” that sort of thing. But sometimes…

…uh…

…well, just look at the headline.

Now, these aren’t regular readers; these are random people who fall down a Google hole and end up here because one of our stories shows up in the search results for often mysterious reasons. I don’t think we’ve written many posts about “beef stew fart in face stories,” but I’d have to check with TK.

Here is a small sampling of some of the weirder search terms that led to our green pastures, from analytics glanced at periodically over a roughly 24-hour-period. Ha ha, I don’t go outside.

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I DON’T KNOW.

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Who is Cheryl, and why are we writing about her ass?

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I know there is some context that will make this not so much of a word salad, but I refuse to Google it. There needs to be some mystery left in the world.

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…No, not at all surprised by this one.

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Ew.

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EW.

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jurassic park omg no.gif

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I didn’t Google image search the second one myself at all.

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What babe? The babe with the power. What power?

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This is… oddly menacing?

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Hi there, American subjected to public school sex ed!

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I assumed this was some 8-year-old searching for celebrity buttholes of the metaphorical variety, but then I see “alison brie sex scene” and “keira nude image,” not to mention the Mickey Rourke search, and… who knows, really?

Verdict: You are all perverts.


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