Check any source for the greatest movie quotes of all time, and they’ll all inevitably provide a list of the usual suspects: “Toto, I have a feeling we’re not in Kansas anymore,” or “Here’s looking at you, kid,” or “Frankly my dear, I don’t give a damn.” Those very quotes — the supposed best in cinema — have, over the course of cinematic history, become clichés in and of themselves, repeated and parodied into a meaningless oblivion, recited only by your crazy uncle while trying to appear culturally relevant.
Frustrated with seeing the same damn tired quotes in every list of the Top 100 Quotes of All Time (most notably AFI’s), over the summer, we here at Pajiba — with the assistance of our readership — put together an alternative list of the 100 Best Quotes of All Time, aka The “Other” 100 Best Quotes of All Time. These are the quotes you throw back and forth at each other over drinks. The ones you work into conversations. The ones that have become part of the running jokes in your lives. Quotes that still have meaning to us and that, in many cases, your crazy uncle would never repeat in polite company.
And like anyone with a success on their hands, we’ve found a way — thanks to Pajiba’s outstanding video editor, hh — to translate those quotes unto another medium: Video. It’s one thing to read and celebrate the inclusion of some of your favorite movie quotes, but it’s quite another to see them in action. To fully appreciate their glory, the other 100 Best quotes needs to be witnessed in their original format. They need to be seen. And heard.
So without further ado, here it is for the YouTube Masses: The “Other” 100 Best Movie Quotes of All Time: The Video.
I think it's perfectly ok for there to be multiple quotes from the same movie. Some movies are just terribly quotable. I for one could have done with a few Princess Bride quotes, but perhaps I'm biased.
"Life is pain, Highness. Anyone who says differently is selling something. "
"Death cannot stop true love. All it can do is delay it for a while."
"Never go in against a Sicilian when death is on the line!"
Excellent! I actually haven't seen most of these movies, but I did get a kick out of the ones I have seen. That's not true. I got a kick out of "THE BEES aaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrg!" and I have no intention of ever seeing that one.
"The hammer is my penis."
Posted by: BWeaves at October 13, 2009 3:54 PM
I enjoyed the last shot of Nic Cage getting stung by bees. He truly deserves that for being one of the worst actors in the history of American movies.
I will always heart movies lines from Almost Famous and The Big Lebowski. Heathers also! Even though there have been so many bad movies, there are still some that you quote endlessly, I'm actually surprised that there weren't more from Fight Club. Especially from the scene where Norton shoots Pitt while standing in back of a van full of explosives! LOL!
Posted by: ph at October 13, 2009 3:56 PM
Excellent job! I would have liked to see a "Big Trouble in Little China" quote but good job overall.
Can we get this man (or wo-man) a T SHIRT! Call it charity, call it EE, I don't care. Make it so.
Posted by: Optimus Rhyme at October 13, 2009 3:57 PM
Now if I were able to watch THAT during my afternoon class today, maybe I wouldn't have been so homicidal! Helmet needs a laptop, stat!
Outstanding job as usual, hh!
Posted by: lordhelmet at October 13, 2009 4:00 PM
Is it worth watching the Wicker Man remake just for the bees quote? I'm tired of being the only person who hasn't seen it. Plus, bees are comedic GOLD.
Posted by: Julie at October 13, 2009 4:01 PM
So I am currently dying from some kind of amalgamation of H1N1, strep throat and pneumonia and this video cheered me right the fuck up. In fact I may be cured. You've cured me with your awesome video editing skills hh! I shall now call you Jesus the miracle worker. You've done what no doctor could do, and for that I thank you.
Posted by: ashes at October 13, 2009 4:14 PM
Squirrel!
Fantastic. I'll be watching that several times more. My dad and I would have added some "Young Frankenstein lines, but so what? It's a bravura video. Thanks!
Posted by: Louise at October 13, 2009 4:15 PM
"Shut that cunt's mouth or I'll come over there and fuckstart her head" is quite possibly the best line ever written in the history of cinema.
Yeah, it's that good.
Posted by: John Denver's Wingman at October 13, 2009 4:25 PM
Oooh TK, we should compose a list of the best cinematic slaps. Only so I can giggle at the thought of Ed Harris beating the shit out of a dead Mary Elizabeth Mastrantonio.
Really excellent job, hh! I foresee myself re-watching this quite frequently.
Posted by: The Wandering Parakeet at October 13, 2009 4:36 PM
Just wow.
I need to reshuffle my Netflix queue!
Posted by: Antietam at October 13, 2009 4:39 PM
You're killin' me, Jay.
Nice work, hh!
Posted by: MelBivDevoe at October 13, 2009 4:43 PM
Great job! Thanks for the hard work!
Posted by: DarthCorleone at October 13, 2009 4:55 PM
wow, no 'noted and corrected'??
just a sneaky correction and removal of the comment?
interesting.
Posted by: dg at October 13, 2009 5:04 PM
Helmet needs a laptop, stat!
Helmet needs an iPhone. That's the only way I access this site during the day. My car is my office and I can get wireless on laptop only in free wifi hotspots.
Great stuff once again. Weren't there a bunch of quotes that didn't make the cut but easily could have? Did Dustin keep that list that he with the leftovers? Could easily make another list, "The Other ... Other 100 Best Movie Quotes."
Posted by: Mick J at October 13, 2009 5:19 PM
Julie, no, it is not worth it. That film will carve a year off of your life.
Posted by: Lauren at October 13, 2009 5:25 PM
This was truly fabulous! "Those who are tardy do not get fruit cup." Love it. Now I really want to rewatch High Anxiety. And Clue. And Blazing Saddles. And Finding Nemo...
Posted by: Gabs at October 13, 2009 5:41 PM
You could have done a entire reel on the quotes from "The Way of the Gun" alone. But good job, very good job.
Posted by: Patricia at October 13, 2009 5:55 PM
What can I say that hasn't been said? This is just outstanding, hh. Really.
One day, I will be able to say "Oh, stewardess, I speak jive" in an appropriate context. That day will be the crowning achievement of my life. I will be able to die happy once I exorcise that demon from my pop culture soul.
Until then, I have to settle for "Kiss my rebel coochie, faggot," which mysteriously did not make this list. I mean, I did smash my forehead against the screen because Juliette Lewis asked me to eat her out, but it's not the same thing.
Posted by: Jackseppelin at October 13, 2009 7:01 PM
I'm still so happy one of my suggestions ("Bratwurst?") made it in, mainly because that's the one of these I quote by far the most often. Excellent work, hh!
Posted by: Shay at October 13, 2009 7:02 PM
A thing of beauty. Don't ever change, 'jiba-masters.
Posted by: popejenn at October 13, 2009 7:15 PM
So enjoyed that! Fantastic job. Goddamn, I love "What's a Nubian?"
Posted by: PallasJay at October 13, 2009 7:22 PM
That was unfuckinbelievable! So awesome! Thank you, thank you thaaaaaank YOU!
a favorite around the house.... "'cuse me while i whip this out." i suppose you could almost put the majority of 'blazing saddles' in there....
Posted by: maxpurr9 at October 13, 2009 8:13 PM
very good job hh. have a Baby Ruth, you earned it.
Posted by: EricD at October 13, 2009 8:20 PM
Thanks for all the comments, much appreciated.
Anyone else having trouble loading the video, or if it plays at all the audio is glitchy and all over the place? I watched it multiple times earlier and it was fine, since then something seems to have gone awry. I've read glitches can occur when theres a high amount of traffic for a youtube video so it's probably just that, but I'm still sitting here biting my fingernails wondering what the fuck is going on!
Posted by: hh at October 13, 2009 8:39 PM
+1
Posted by: trippdup at October 13, 2009 8:41 PM
Fucking Sandlot, what is with people and that movie?
Posted by: Jay at October 13, 2009 4:33 PM
---
You got a problem with "The Sandlot"? You got a problem with ,.
*reaches for baseball bat*
Posted by: , (the commenter formerly known as bucdaddy) at October 13, 2009 9:06 PM
Fantastic! I agree with Sally though, the list needed some O Brother Where Art Thou love.
"What's your damage Heather?" is my fav Heathers line. I use it whenever I can. I also have a soft spot for Frank Booth's "Suave! Goddam you're one suave fucker!" It doesn't make too many lists, I wonder why?
Posted by: Agente Provocatrice at October 13, 2009 9:28 PM
LAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMMMME!!!!
SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO close they got ALL the WRONG quotes from the right movies MAN!
It should have been:
"get a couple of niggers" from Blazing Saddles
Taylor Negron and the sleazy women from Better Off Dead
Toshi Station to get Power Converters from Star Wars
It ain't me you gotta be afraid of and Are You afraid of the dark from from Diesel's Pitch Black and Chronicles
"Over Man" from Aliens
"Spectacular friends, but it was all for NAUGHT!" from Spaceballs
"Never go against the family"
COME ....ON! man
Posted by: BarbadoSlim at October 13, 2009 9:50 PM
I wept tiny, nerdy tears of silent joy that you included the scene of President Skroob lamenting "How come nobody told me my ass was so big?" -- those words changed my life back in the 80s. Oh how they changed it. Thanks, Pajiba!
Robert, I think that would be the crowning achievement in anyone's life. Although if you're actively pursuing this goal, I might have to start following you around to see it happen.
Excellent work. There are a few of those movies I haven't seen. I shall have to remedy that soon.
Posted by: MM at October 14, 2009 1:11 AM
Thank you. I shall have sweet, bee-laden dreams tonight and much to watch tomorrow.
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Posted by: ALICE at October 14, 2009 4:51 AM
That was the Ball's Tits. Even quotes that are left out are represented by others from the same movie.
I think The Cage reacts more severely to a solid bowel movement than he showed with those bees. I would be bashing my face on the ground trying to kill those things.
Posted by: Kballs at October 14, 2009 8:23 AM
Fantastic finish, very Pajiban. Although the bees seem to be ignoring his eyes and focusing entirely on his chin. I guess, "Ahh! My chin! My chin!" doesn't have the same ring to it.
"The hammer is my penis" is a line I don't hear nearly enough. Glad to see that Serenity was represented, since I can quote most of that movie and frequently do. Most recently: "I don't wanna explode!"
"Fruit cup" and "I speak jive" are new ones to me; thanks for starting my morning with a hearty laugh.
Posted by: DeadBessie at October 14, 2009 8:44 AM
I just... I can't... It's so...
YES.
Posted by: Squeeziee at October 14, 2009 8:44 AM
Housekeeping....You want fresh towels? That's one we are constantly kicking around. I'm a little surprised it didn't make the cut.
Posted by: alphawhiskey at October 14, 2009 10:34 AM
I lost my hand! I lost my bride! Johnny has his hand! Johnny has his bride! You want me to take my heartache, put it away and FORGET?!
Posted by: AM at October 14, 2009 10:36 AM
Jeni, I know it's my destiny to have it work. Considering the other awful racist things I get away with saying pulled straight from film and television in everyday conversation, it's inevitable that I'll be sitting on an airplane some day and have the opportunity to say it at the right time. I'm not willing to call it fate, as I don't believe God wishes to see me finally get the beat down I deserve for this kind of behavior. Destiny seems about right.
In the words of Jeff Spicoli, "Awesome. . . totally awesome."
Posted by: Captain Tuttle at October 14, 2009 12:40 PM
hh - you are like a force unleashed! That was beautifully done and you ROCK!
Posted by: replica at October 14, 2009 12:55 PM
Barbado: Ok THREAD HIJACK!!! Who else wants to NAIL Taylor from the Rachel Zoe Project?
I want to nail her to a board, shave her head (those aren't bangs, it's her hair combed forward!) and smack that expression off her face. Is that what you meant?
Posted by: amanda47 at October 14, 2009 4:41 PM
Barbado: Ok THREAD HIJACK!!! Who else wants to NAIL Taylor from the Rachel Zoe Project?
I want to nail her to a board, shave her head (those aren't bangs, it's her hair combed forward!) and smack that expression off her face. Is that what you meant?
Posted by: amanda47 at October 14, 2009 6:28 PM
Wire hangers, why? Why? Christina, get out of that bed. GET OUT OF THAT BED.
Posted by: Snuggiepants the Deathbringer at October 15, 2009 3:10 PM
Chidduck: You believe in karma?
Joe Sarno: Karma is just justice without the satisfaction. I don't believe in justice.
Longbaugh: What do you think?
Parker: I think a plan is just a list of things that don't happen.
Longbaugh: Why's that such a big deal?
Interviewer: Because no one brings up sex with dead people!
Longbaugh: 'Course they don't, it's sick.
Interviewer: You brought it up!
Longbaugh: Only to say I never did it.
Interviewer: I didn't ask you that.
Longbaugh: [smiling] You should.
-The Way of the Gun
Seriously, you should see this movie.
Posted by: Patricia at October 15, 2009 6:02 PM
Fantastic list...
My favorite Spaceballs quote is: "only one man dare give me the raspberry!"
Also, I could quote Mallrats all day long. This could have been avoided had some parent, I don't care which one, but had some parent taught that kid to fear and respect that escalator!
Posted by: Erin at October 16, 2009 1:25 AM
"Of course he has a knife. We all have knives. It's 1183 and we're barbarians."
This was great. I loved the juxtaposition of The Big Lebowski and Breakfast Club quotes. Not sure how quotes from my Friday night got in there, though.
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Posted by: Lydia at October 18, 2009 10:00 AM
Pretty solid list (some I wasn't familiar with; is there an index list somewhere?), but could certainly use either "I believe you have my stapler" or "Didja get that memo?" from Office Space.
Posted by: Jon at October 23, 2009 4:23 PM
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