Dinner for Schmucks | A Movie Review for Schmucks

A Movie Review for Schmucks

By Dustin Rowles | Posted Under Film Reviews | Comments (60)

Paul Rudd plays Tim. Tim is up for a ~~promotion~~ better job at the company he works for. In order to ~~procure~~ get the better job, Tim has to bring an ~~eccentric addleplate~~ idiot to dinner so that he and his co-workers can ~~deride~~ make fun of him. Tim’s girlfriend, Julie (Stephanie Szostak) thinks this is a very mean idea, and asks Tim not to do it.

Tim meets Barry (Steve Carell), who ~~is employed with the IRS~~ is a tax man that ~~has an interest in taxidermy~~ likes to stuff dead mice and make them look like mice versions of famous paintings. Barry is ~~peculiar~~ different. Tim decides to invite him to the dinner. Julie gets mad. They get in a fight. Barry comes over to Tim’s apartment one night early. Barry ~~makes the situation worse~~ messes up everything in Tim’s life. Julie leaves Tim. Tim blames Barry. Barry and Tim have an argument. Barry comes to the dinner anyway. The dinner is at the end of the movie. The movie last one hour and 55 minutes. The dinner is only in the last 20 minutes. Everything in the movie before the dinner is unfunny. The dinner is unfunny.

~~Zack Galifianakis~~ The guy from The Hangover has two scenes. He thinks he can control minds. It is not funny. Steve Carell makes a lot of funny faces which are not funny. Paul Rudd is a charming person; he is not funny in this movie. Jay Roach is ~~incompetent~~ a very bad director. Dinner for Schmucks is less funny than Meet the Fockers. That is very unfunny. There is nothing ~~redeeming~~ good in this film, which is based on ~~Francis Veber’s 1998 French farce Le Dîner des cons~~ a movie from another country. The original movie was funny because it was mean. This movie is neither mean nor funny. All the jokes are like five-year-old ~~Internet memes~~ running jokes that were very popular on your computer. I ~~nodded off~~ fell asleep twice. I did not like this movie. I do not think that you will like this movie. You should not pay to see it. You should not see it for free. If you see this movie on a plane, and you have nothing better to do but to watch it, ask the pilot to steer the airplane into the ocean. That will be more funny than this movie.

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Comments

bummer. i was kinda looking forward to this.

Posted by: causaubon at July 30, 2010 2:43 PM

So it's Love Guru with Steve Carell.

Posted by: John W at July 30, 2010 2:44 PM

I laughed six times reading your review. Was that more or less than the # of times you laughed during the movie?

I'm just going to assume it was more.

Posted by: superasente at July 30, 2010 2:45 PM

so sad. what a waste...

Posted by: maxpurr9 at July 30, 2010 2:49 PM

Everything should be this succinct. Everything.

Including lovemaking.

I would have so much more time to run IMPORTANT ERRANDS.

Posted by: Byrd at July 30, 2010 2:50 PM

Meh, fake teeth = bad movie.

Side note - did you know the word "schmuck" before this movie? I lived in Indiana for a while and did some clerical work at a wireless store. After one of the salesmen finished dealing with a customer that he had really been flattering and kissing up to, I said to him,

"Boy you really schmoozed that guy."

And he did not know what I meant.

Are these Yiddish derived words as common in other parts of the US and world or is it more of an New York area thing?

Posted by: mswas at July 30, 2010 2:54 PM

Darn, I was hoping this would be one of those movies where the trailer makes it look like crap but it's actually pretty understated and hilarious. Apparently, it's not funny at all. Between this and I Could Never Be Your Woman, I seriously wonder about Paul Rudd. I still love him. Oh well.

Posted by: griffimx at July 30, 2010 2:55 PM

Les Diner des Cons was hilarious!I remember watching it in French class in high school. Actually, I think I'm gonna netflix it now. But nope, will not watch this movie despite my love for Paul Rudd.

Posted by: denesteak at July 30, 2010 2:56 PM

mswas,
"Schmuck" and "schmooz" have been folded into the English language and are widely used. One guy in Turdfart, USA not knowing what "schmooz" means isn't a fair barometer of its use across the land. Just like everything else around here, Whitey took whatever Yiddish words it needed and broke the fuck out.

Posted by: Kballs at July 30, 2010 3:09 PM

"Meshuggeh" you might have a little more trouble with.

Posted by: Jay at July 30, 2010 3:16 PM

Despite the presence of Jay Roach, I had my hopes up.

Dang.

Posted by: Seany D at July 30, 2010 3:17 PM

God dammit, I really wanted this to be funny, and I can't believe the dinner is only a little bit at the end. I guess the trailer did a good job of making it seem like a bigger part of the movie.

Disingenuous.

Posted by: Snath at July 30, 2010 3:20 PM

I understand that sponserships pay your collective way, but (even as a Canadian) watching the Moosehead ad EVERY TIME I click a link is tedious. I am a longtime fan, datng back to YBNBY days - how about a break?

Posted by: Stephen at July 30, 2010 3:23 PM

For this movie to be funny, it has to be mean. I'm not surprised they didn't want to be mean since then Paul Rudd and the audience would be assholes.

Jay Roach's last funny movie was....?

Posted by: Fredo at July 30, 2010 3:23 PM

-sigh- I was also looking forward to this. Paul Rudd can do wrong. And he does so often.
Yet we still love him. Because he's awesome forever. Truth.

Posted by: gee. ay. at July 30, 2010 3:24 PM

mswas, I live in Indiana now and I know what BOTH those words mean. So there!

Posted by: dammitjanet at July 30, 2010 3:34 PM

And, on a related note, my co-worker's sister-in-law went to a screening of this last night and said "it was the funniest movie she'd ever seen," and that they should go see it this weekend.

Dumb Buckeyes.

Posted by: dammitjanet at July 30, 2010 3:36 PM

I usually avoid giving Herr Rowles any credit whatsoever buuuuut his review here pretty much nails the vibe I've been getting from all the clips and promotional G4 press tour. A "crew" of guys with previous medium/mild success at making semi-funny flicks thinking the are OOOOOOH SOOOO CLEVER, look how funny we are LOOK! LOOK! we a have FAT guy doing shtick!!! LOOK! LOOK! we have the other guy and the other one from that other funny movie. *HI-FIVE* BRO, CHA-CHING!

Posted by: BarbadoSlim at July 30, 2010 3:38 PM

~~Disingenuous.~~

Posted by: Snath at July 30, 2010 3:20 PM

Dishonest.

Posted by: PissBoy at July 30, 2010 3:39 PM

dammitjanet - so you put the schmuck in Indiana?

Posted by: mswas at July 30, 2010 3:42 PM

Honey, there have been schmucks here as long as I can remember.

Posted by: dammitjanet at July 30, 2010 3:46 PM

hahaha - where are you in IN? we were in Muncie

Posted by: mswas at July 30, 2010 3:51 PM

The trailer really sucks. When I saw it for the first time, my first thought was: "Is this the best they can show to get people into the theatre"? Guess the movie is as bad as I had thought.

Posted by: mslewis at July 30, 2010 4:02 PM

I remember back in highschool, we were all getting football jerseys for a club we were in (do they still do that or was it a 70's thing?).

One of my friends decided she wanted SCHMUCK as the name on the back of her jersey. Since I was the only Jew in the school, I felt it was my duty to inform her that "schmuck" was Yiddish for "penis." It only means "idiot" because you're calling someone a "dick." Needless to say, she did not get SCHMUCK on her jersey.

However, I couldn't stop my other friend from getting "PUTANA" on her jersey because she thought it sounded pretty. My Italian Catholic friend thought it was funnier to keep her mouth shut. Good times.

Then there was my other friend who wanted to know why her brother called her a bunch of sticks. He had called her a "faggot" and she looked it up in the dictionary and . . .

Damn, we were a naive bunch.

Posted by: BWeaves at July 30, 2010 4:11 PM

I remember an experience in high school in which I had to inform my history teacher that it's best not to repeat the word 'kurva' just because he had heard my Slovak friend reference it (and not in a complimentary way). He didn't believe me.

I remember another experience in high school in which I had to inform my (incidentally straight) French teacher that it's really, really , REALLY not a good idea to start throwing around phrases that'll get into some real trouble in a depressingly homophobic and sexist country like Jamaica. The place has things to recommend it, but the firestorm that would ensue should he refer to himself as a 'bottie boi' wouldn't expose him to its best side. He didn't believe me. Right, because ol' pasty balls would know better than I would.

I wonder if they're still alive.

***

I don't think not knowing 'schmooze' is a geographical thing, I think the person you were talking to was just dumb. Schmooze and schumuck are very much in the common parlance here (Ontario), and though you won't hear it as often, I'm sure a sizeable chunk of the population would be at least familiar with 'meshuggeh', if not readily able to use in a sentence.

***
I have had no knowledge of this film ever having existed. Am I so out of touch, or are the children the ones to blame? I've heard of the Veber before, maybe I should check it out.

Posted by: Jo 'Mama' Besser at July 30, 2010 4:36 PM

A little off-topic, but how the fuck do you get that effect where you write crossed-out words? Do you need special HTML skills or something? A keyboard trick? What?
Inquiring minds want to know...

Posted by: TheUpsetter at July 30, 2010 4:43 PM

Y'know, I live in Texas. I've lived in Texas my whole life (though, I have ventured out of it as much as I can). I've known what a "schmuck" is since I was a small boy. Same for "schlemiel" and "schlamazel" and "schmooze" and "oy vey!" and all the other fun Yiddishisms. I'm also a fan of many a Jewish entertainer. I knew who Albert Brooks was before I could walk. No, that's not true. It was before I could ride a bike, though.

Posted by: RobP at July 30, 2010 4:52 PM

~~what?~~

Posted by: DeckOfficer!! at July 30, 2010 5:00 PM

Do you also write the Lost recaps?

Posted by: MystTeree at July 30, 2010 5:06 PM

Do you need special HTML skills or something? A keyboard trick? What?
Inquiring minds want to know...
Posted by: TheUpsetter at July 30, 2010 4:43 PM

--------------------------------------------

Are you suuuuuure you want to know these things? You MIGHT find out things, dark, disturbing things. You might end up knowing MORE than you BARGAINED FOR!!

Posted by: BarbadoSlim at July 30, 2010 5:08 PM

cf. BarbadoSlim's comment ... indeed, you might find out everything you thought you knew was a lie!

Posted by: Pat C at July 30, 2010 5:21 PM

Anyone who doesn't now schmooze from schmuck has a terminal case of goyische kopf.

Posted by: leagleeagle at July 30, 2010 5:28 PM

Even down here in little New Zealand I know what the words schmuck and schmooze mean. I hesitate to tell you that I learned them from Jackie Collins novels, but there you go. But even I do not know how to cross out words on my computer. Damn you Jackie, only teaching me how to use Yiddish words, rely on my looks and hook up with the mob.

Posted by: wildflower at July 30, 2010 5:51 PM

psssst. the secret lies like this: use these
with an s in them, on either side of the word/words you want to strike through. it isn't a HUGE secret you can also insert an *i* to make italics
or B to make it bold like this

Posted by: DeckOfficer!! at July 30, 2010 6:28 PM

dang it! these ()

Posted by: DeckOfficer!! at July 30, 2010 6:30 PM

I quit. you know the shift comma and period

Posted by: DeckOfficer!! at July 30, 2010 6:31 PM

mswas, that's weird! I'm just outside of New Castle, and have 2 kids moving to Muncie in 2 weeks to start BSU!!!

Posted by: dammitjanet at July 30, 2010 6:39 PM

Internal conflict here. My love of Paul Rudd say "go see it." My respect for Pajiba says "Skip it." Ebert's review says, "You may very well like it," since he apparently dug it allright. The fact that I am loathe to see or not see any movie simply because of a review says, "Go with your gut and enjoy Pretty Paul Rudd Time."

I think I just answered my own question.

Posted by: Tammy at July 30, 2010 8:40 PM

dammitjanet We lived in Muncie for 4 yrs while husb got his Ph.D. at BSU. Nice little town, but so far from our families.

Posted by: mswas at July 30, 2010 10:36 PM

The Zach Galifinakis mind control scenes in the trailers are the only parts I was laughing at. But maybe that's because I've been doing an excessive amount of drinking lately.

Posted by: henchman for hire at July 30, 2010 10:39 PM

Weird, Dustin is the only reviewer on this site for whom I will watch a film if he doesn't like it.

Posted by: arrrghzi at July 30, 2010 11:49 PM

(s)I enjoyed it(s) It was entertaining.

Posted by: poop at July 31, 2010 12:35 AM

Don't listen to this sarcastic review. The movie is funny, charming and sweet.

Posted by: Horace at July 31, 2010 3:02 AM

Hi Hello

Posted by: New Guy at July 31, 2010 4:10 AM

I knew it.

Posted by: iknewit at July 31, 2010 6:11 AM

Not really sure I'm ok with that!! better ask my friends met on ==== Sugarmommamatch

.c o m ==== know what? I do think people I met there are hot and sincere! Desipte the

actual so-called Age Gap, we get along together splendidly!! and I'm even thinking

about romance there!! lol

Posted by: mary at July 31, 2010 12:06 PM

So what your saying is that its a Steve Carell movie. Enough said, pass.

Posted by: clancys_daddy at July 31, 2010 12:31 PM

I've lived in memphis most of my life and I know dozens of Yiddish words and phrases. Don't you folks watch Mel Brooks movies? Or Seinfeld? Henny Youngman? Fiddler on the Roof? Etc?

Favorite Yiddish joke:

Sadie: "Irving, you're the second biggest schmuck in the world!"

Irving: "Second? Why aren't I the biggest schmuck in the world?"

Sadie: "Because you're a schmuck!"

Posted by: The Mutt at July 31, 2010 3:17 PM

I knew it.

Posted by: iknewit at July 31, 2010 6:11 AM

But did you know it?

Posted by: MM at July 31, 2010 5:49 PM

I think the word is addle-pate, as in silly-head.

Posted by: Sextant at August 1, 2010 1:11 AM

Dustin et al:

Thanks for providing an entertaining warning for me to save 12 bucks. I had hoped Steve Carell would somehow redeem himself on this one, but apparently not. He goes back into the Carrey/Stiller bin again.

Posted by: Maximum Bob at August 1, 2010 7:25 AM

So you loved it then? And we should all go see it again and again and become devoted like the Twihards, only we'll be "schmuckers" and have goofy/mean dinner parties and scream for Steve Carrell and Paul Rudd and Beardman?!

Posted by: Kelly at August 2, 2010 1:06 AM

This movie is quite funny. The great part is how nuanced the Carrel character is. You will really love him, I swear.

It's just good fun.

Posted by: Tammy at August 2, 2010 1:56 AM

People who don't know what Schmuck and Schmooze mean are the same people who say "I could of had a V8".

Posted by: Protoguy at August 2, 2010 9:18 AM

Turds, and Double Turds. I was so looking forward to seeing this. I wanted it to be so funny, I needed it to be hilarious. Dammit Rudd and Carell- you are NOT SUPPOSED TO LET ME DOWN.

Maybe I am late to the game, but I am starting to sincerely believe that there is an inverse relationship to the quality of a film and the amount of media foreplay given to said film.

Rat turds and finger bangs.

Posted by: Juice in LA at August 2, 2010 3:57 PM

Under duress I saw this movie over the weekend and give it a generous D-. I missed giving it an F only because Paul Rudd is hot.

But there were people in the theater laughing their asses off and there was applause at the end, which luckily masked my gagging sounds. There will be some folks that find DFS funny. They probably eat Spam and are into cosdressing, but they are out there. You know who you are...

Posted by: Cookie at August 4, 2010 9:40 AM

This movie was soooo funny! I recommend this to anyone who has a sense of humour.. one of the funniest movies I've ever seen.

Posted by: Zakk at August 4, 2010 1:43 PM

I totally agree with this review! This movie was a complete waste of time and money....and talented actors.

Posted by: Vespertine at August 14, 2010 7:51 AM

They're selling it illegally over here in Indonesia. I saw the film and I actually think Jay Roach should reimburse the pirating Chinese on this one. The French original was outstanding.

Posted by: tim mckinney at December 14, 2010 4:52 AM

~~just testing ~~oh my god this is cool~~~~

i am a lobster

doh!

Posted by: g3 at January 24, 2011 11:56 PM

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