Pajiba

Awww, Jeremy and Hitler are wearing the same outfit. How sweet.

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Word, Spambot. Word.

I mean, sure, she leaves her baby to go dance around in gorilla suits and sparkle capes on a daily basis

I'm no fan of anyone named Palin (and my browser is helpfully -- and accurately -- telling me that an alternate spelling of that would be "Pain"), but this smacks of condemnation of working mothers. I'm sure that wasn't your point, and lord knows there are higher callings than Dancing with the Stars (garbage men, for instance). But still.

AWWWW SHIT, HITLER!!!! Feist dun caught you wearin' his outfit! You lucky you already dead or he'd kill you a second time for Naziing up his favorite shirt, bitch!

Well this is awkward... One of us is going to have to change.

...I'm looking at you, Sexy Hitler.

I was here first.

I promise you that he's throwing away the condom and putting the wrapper on his dick. Or he's putting the condom on his arm to protect himself while fisting. If this goof really needs a Magnum then the average American male needs a Hefty bag.

Fuck you, Sexy Hitler! I'm higher up on the page than you, which means I was here first, which means you need to throw on a fucking shirt before I smack a bitch up!

And Kballs, that's called a harness.

HA! You Canucks have weird words for EVERYTHING!

Don't forget, Feist. I'm still #1.

Why does it look like you have it on sideways.

...and I'm off to buy a replacement, liquid-proof monitor.

/high-five

AHAHAHAHHAHAAAAA!!!!!! FEISTY!!!!!!

You'd think that mug of hers would guaranty abstinence. Guess pickings are pretty slim in Alaska.

Get 'em PaddyDog!

"Bristol" is cockney rhyming slang for "titty".

Bristol City (pl. Bristols) = titty (pl. titties)

Just sayin'.

Durex's version of the magnum condom is the "KING"...I wouldn't be surprised if The Situation wore a "groundling"

The Situation is a walking, talking pro-abstinence advertisement. All he had to do was show up.

I could only get about 1 min into that clip, but really, I think it insults the intelligence of the target audience. I guess I don't really know any kids in that age group these days, but I cannot imagine any of them taking Bristol Palin or That Godawful Situation seriously. Now, if Ms Palin wanted to get real, show clips of staying up all night with a colicky baby, or having an explosive diaper issue, or pretty much ANYTHING other than 'Hey, I had a baby as a teen and NOW I am FAMOUS!!' then it might be useful. As for the Situation, I think we should take up a collection to pay for his immediate vasectomy.

I'll bet there's a hipster douchebag making an auto-tune of this right now. Hell, it's probably already been made. Every time someone loses their sense of irony, a hipster douchebag drinks a Pabst Blue Ribbon.

Bristol Palin doesn't know the consequences of pre-marital sex, other than that she might have about nine months of varying forms/levels of discomfort. Since she gave birth, she's been part of her mother's Fightin' Round the World tour. Clearly, if she's worked a day in her life, it was just a day. Probably at a Sonic. I'll bet she got tipped like a stripper on Friday night.

But, yeah, once the shine is off this family (hopefully sooner than later), it will sure be nice for her son to know how rich her mother got by announcing to the world, "I wish I'd never had my baby." Stay class, Palins.

Oh! And, don't trash talk all Palins. Michael Palin is a god damn saint.

Alright, so what I'm reading as deadpan, is just sincerity. I thought you were implying the inept fetishist thing.
Honest mistake.

No, no, no. Don't you dare!
Seriously.

This is all on me, Mrs. J.

Was that pic from Folsom Street Fair, Jeremy?

Concerning the lop-sidedness of the harness:

I actually got it from my gay uncles. About a month ago they sent me some of their old leather and one of the pieces they sent was the harness. For some reason, there's an extra loop on it, and while I've asked Sam (my resident leather expert) couldn't figure out what the fuck is going on with that. So yeah; it's a little weirded up. Go fig.

And JapJay: Sadly no, although there are a bunch on Facebook.

Well, I gotta be honest. Even though it was utterly cringe-inducing with the acting and the "situation"-ing, I don't think the message actually was betrayed by these particular spokespeople.

It was pretty clear that Palin was suggesting that, in the wake of her pregnancy, she'll prefer to be abstinent from now on. And people do this all the time. They have a previous history of boning, but they choose to abstain from it for awhile. We seem to equate practicing abstinence with being virginal. That's false - anyone can practice abstinence at any time, for any reason. It's not hypocritical for her. It's moving forward.

As for the Situation, he's a known whore, so it makes perfect sense to have someone who you know has a lot of sex talk about at least stopping and wrapping that shit up first. Because lord knows none of us want to see that procreate.

Hee. Sexy Hitler at #1 made me scream with laughter.

@Amanda6
Damn you and your excellent points!!! Especially the one about no one wanting to see Mike Sorrentino (I vehemently refuse to call him *that* nickname. Mostly, because I'm preeetty sure he gave it to himself.) procreate. His kids would look like Frankenstein busts made out of orange Play-Doh.

@Courtney
Q: You know what's worse than "The Situation"?
A: "The Sitch" #RageSeizures