Every Sam Worthington Since Sam Worthington in 2009

By Dustin Rowles | Celebrity | April 13, 2016 | Comments ()

By Dustin Rowles | Celebrity | April 13, 2016 |


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News of the dissolution of the romantic relationship between Kirsten Dunst and her boyfriend of four years, Garrett Hedlund, broke last night while Josh Kurp, Joanna Robinson and I were recording our Station Agents podcast (yes, it’s back!). I had no idea they were dating, while Joanna was heartbroken.

Josh, meanwhile, had jokes.

2009-2010

As news like this is wont to do, it also inspired a discussion among us of who the current Sam Worthington is. Sam Worthington, as you recall, was the 2009-2010 version of himself, by which we mean: A completely forgettable actor that Hollywood tried to turn into a star. In a two-year period, he was in Avatar, Terminator Salvation and Clash of the Titans. Six years later, and the Aussie actor is now in massive blockbuster hits like The Keeping Room, Paper Planes and Cake with Jennifer Aniston (I had no idea he was in that, and even if I’d seen Cake, I probably would still have no idea he was in that).

2010-2011

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Worthington’s successor, of course, was Garrett Hedlund, who took the forgettable guy crown and ran with it in 2010 and 2011 with Country Strong and Tron: Legacy. He was last seen by no one in Pan.

2012

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Hedlund’s successor was at least a guy we can still name and recognize: Taylor Kitsch, who single-handedly destroyed the 2012 box-office with Battleship and John Carter (and yes, I know: You liked John Carter. Good for you. It still sucked).

2013

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The following year, 2013, saw the introduction of another future Sam Worthington, Henry Cavill, who is lucky enough to have a franchise that will keep him in the public eye for a few more years. Rest assured, however, that once Superman is extinguished from the current DC Universe, Cavill will Worthington his way into obscurity. Poor guy. No one cares about him.

2014-2015

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Since 2014, really, two men (who are in the same franchise, one shared with Sam Worthington) have been battling it out to become the next great Worthington: Jason Clarke (John Connor) and Jai Courtney (Kyle Reese). You’ve probably seen some of their other movies, but you may not remember that they were in them, such is the power of their Worthington-ness: Dawn of the Planet of the Apes, A Good Day to Die Hard , Divergent, Unbroken Child 44 and White House Down (good luck guessing which bland blond guy was in each).

One of those guys will eventually be crowned the 2014-2015 Sam Worthington, and my money is on Jai Courtney.

2016

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Who will be 2016’s Sam Worthington? It’s still early yet, but if I were a betting man, I’d put all my chips on The Hunger Games Finnick Odair, Sam Claflin, who will be in The Huntsman: Winter’s War and The Finest Hour and a Half with Gemma Arterton, and Me Before You with Emilia Clarke. He’s got all the traits of a perfect Worthington!


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