Full disclosure: I don’t watch Doctor Who. I watched one episode where Matt Jamison found Secret Call Girl and her boyfriend about to be attacked by … metal thingies, and then saved Secret Call Girl but boyfriend was trash can killed but maybe not, and I never went back. I also know from my good friend Courtney not to make the mistakes of Big Bang Theories past.
So why would I bother writing about The Doctor Who at all? Male tears, baby. I will always show up for the male tears.
I mean, straight out the gate.
WE HAVE TAKEN YOUR GHOSTBUSTERS AND STAR WARS AND SUPERHEROES AND DOCTOR WHO NOTHING IS SACRED WE WILL DEFILE IT ALL WITH OUR WOMANLY HANDS— grace ✨ GOT spoilers (@andlivefromny) July 16, 2017
nerd boys: i hate that there's a female Doctor Who!!! if a woman is in it i'm OUT!— Lane Moore (@hellolanemoore) July 16, 2017
also nerd boys: women won't date me because i'm too nice
Well actually, its about ethics in time travel.— Imani Gandy (@AngryBlackLady) July 16, 2017
A girl Dr Who, my God where can I go anymore to see white men in sci fi and fantasy pop culture. pic.twitter.com/QZ9UZ6eC12— Low-Quality Goat (@JuliusGoat) July 16, 2017
Oh, oh, oh! We had this special snowflake lay out for us the worst thing he would possibly imagine happening to him.
Imagine one of your favourite shows but with someone of the opposite gender playing your favourite character(s). Hell.— Jamie Ghis (@GhisPerrier) July 16, 2017
And all of Female Internetness spoke back in Parker Molloy’s voice.
Imagine this being your definition of "hell." https://t.co/28gc7fK5Xu— Parker Molloy (@ParkerMolloy) July 16, 2017
Also speaking for all of us.
Oh do fuck the fuck off. pic.twitter.com/D44qWq2v5D— amanda abbington (@CHIMPSINSOCKS) July 16, 2017
But also, we should probably keep in mind that there are a lot of people who still deserve the chance to speak for themselves.
One day we're gonna have the first woman something NOT be a white woman. One day.— Marco Rogers (@polotek) July 16, 2017
I wish I could go back in time and tell my young nerd self that she's not going to have to pretend to be the boys forever. pic.twitter.com/YX8ti03jRe— Mackenzi Lee (@themackenzilee) July 16, 2017
Cool, back to male tears.
They should remake '12 Angry Men' with an all female cast without changing the title and watch in glee as men's heads explode.— Garrett Johnson (@stereofiasco) July 16, 2017
Your occasional reminder that #DoctorWho's creator, Sydney Newman, wanted a woman cast in the role in 1986. That's thirty one years ago.— James Cooray Smith (@thejimsmith) July 16, 2017
And the absolute winner of the Internet today:
And The Doctor says, "I can't operate this TARDIS. It's my son."— Stevenson Waltien (@waltien) July 16, 2017
Thank you, Twitter, for reminding us why we keep you around.