Hollywood's Greatest Scandal: The McElroy Brothers Are Wizards
Listen, there’s no easy way of saying this: black magic is real, and the McElroy Brothers are using it to their advantage. Which pains me greatly because I am an active and eager consumer of their many entertainment products. (Also, I’m sure Griffin would like me to remind you that they are the stars of six full episodes of a television program. Hollywood Griffin forever.) But I’m not sure how else to explain a recent string of events.
It actually began a little over a year ago when fans of the MBMBaM podcast recognized a simple fact: @midnight is a TV shows where three funny people make a lot of (somewhat) good goofs. The McElroys have a podcast where three funny brothers make a lot of (actually) good, good goofs. Why aren’t the McElroys on @midnight?
Last week it was announced the McElroys will be on the July 24th episode of @midnight. This morning it was announced that @midnight is canceled. You’re going to tell me that’s a fucking coincidence?
Now a more trusting person (or a shill as I like to call them) would tell you that this is simply a case of the McElroys’ rising star power crossing paths with the decline of the TV show’s. The brothers have a dedicated enough fanbase that they can agitate to get the Brothers on the show, and the show is now desperate enough for guests that they would book some relatively unknown podcasters. Bullshit. THE BROTHERS JUST TALKED YESTERDAY ABOUT HOW NERVOUS THEY ARE ABOUT GOING ON THE SHOW. They showed the slightest hesitation about something, and Secreted that thing out of existence.
At this point, I’m sure some of you are noting that maybe the Brothers aren’t responsible for “black” magic. Maybe they’re simply taking out Chris Hardwick one horcrux at a time. Great. Would you care to explain this? Oh, what’s that? You can’t? You can’t explain how it is that the McElroy Brothers know with such certainty that they will be in Trolls 2 that they have made an “aspirational” podcast called The McElroy Brothers Will Be In Trolls 2?
You can’t explain it without reaching the same, totally logical conclusion: the McElroy Brothers are Wizards. Clearly.