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The 2013 Pajiba Ten: The 10 Most Bunkworthy Celebrities on the Planet

By The Pajiba Staff | Guides | July 26, 2013 |

By The Pajiba Staff | Guides | July 26, 2013 |

We say this every year, and now in its seventh incarnation, it is no less true: The Pajiba 10 is the perfect entry point into our little spot on the Internet. The actors and actresses who comprise the Pajiba 10 are a great reflection of the mentality of the readers and contributors of this site. We value talent and playfulness, the two qualities that seem to bring out the elected members sex appeal the most. We love self-awareness but eschew self-seriousness: A guy who can vie for an Oscar and turn around and walk through the floors at Comic Con or do a silly off-the-cuff impression during an junket interview is the kind of person we value the most.

All ten of this year’s members fit that description. This year’s list also has five new members, and three long-time favorites who will be elevated into the Hall of Fame next year. They are as follows. (Click here to skip to the Top 5)

10. Tatiana Maslany — There are a lot of things that are absolutely amazing when it comes to Ms. Maslany, the Canadian breakout star of the stellar “Orphan Black.” She’s been acting for more than a decade, but it’s with the arrival of her role(s) in the new BBC America drama that she began garnering serious attention. Her performance of no fewer than six characters, each of different backgrounds and nationalities ranging from suburban housewife to an English con-artist to an unhinged Ukrainian assassin (not to mention the fan-favorite sexy grad student) is a marvel to witness. As an actress, she’s to be commended for not only selling each part so well that you believe that you’re seeing different people on screen, but also for her dedication to what can only be a painstaking process of filming and re-filming each and every scene. (For a fascinating glimpse, take a look at this video.) As a result, it’s hard to pin down what her endearing traits are because she displays so many. If you’re watching the show, then at any given moment she can seem plucky, sexy, terrifying, goofy, sultry, intelligent, awkward, brazen, dangerous, timid, domineering, and cunning … all at once, yet not at once. If you watch an interview with her as an actress, she’s funny, charming, clever, and altogether adorable. And while she’s quite lovely, she’s not gorgeous by Hollywood standards but has a fresh, striking sex appeal that I find absolutely entrancing. Like I said, there are a lot of things about her that are pretty amazing. Pick any one of them and you’ll be happy. — TK





9. Nikolaj Coster-Waldau — We may never properly spell or say his name, but we damned sure know this delicious Danish(man) on sight. There’s that chiseled jaw, and the way he stares right through the camera till our legs go to jelly. Coster-Waldau grabbed Ridley Scott’s attention with only a homemade audition tape (the director cast him in Black Hawk Down and Kingdom of Heaven), then broke into our collective consciousness with his Detective John Amsterdam, cursed with immortality — yet short-lived on Fox. But nothing can keep a great actor down and in 2011, Nikolaj gave us his one-two punch as duplicitous Clas in Headhunters and the incestuous Kingslayer (and child maimer) Jaime Lannister in “Game of Thrones.” Pretty as he is, we Pajibans are never taken by beauty alone, but we’d nothing to fear. In three seasons, Coster-Waldau’s Jaime has evolved from privileged, pompous and pretty to emotionally and physically broken … and surprisingly protective. His adventures with Brienne have been alternately moving and funny (and hot); the two could easily carry their own show. We’re still recovering from Jaime’s “Mhysa”-ending face. Whether kicking ass in a suit, or climbing bare-assed from a hot tub, Nikolaj Coster-Waldau is one sublime import. — Cindy Davis

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8. Jake Johnson — Jake Johnson makes his inaugural appearance on the 10 this year, and it’s no wonder why. For the duration of “The New Girl,” Nick had been our buddy. Nick’s the kind of guy you can trust. The kind of guy you can drink a beer with. The kind of guy who doesn’t mind if you puke in his car. Even after his outstanding role in Safety Not Guaranteed, he was still very friendzoned in our collective minds. But, then, something changed. And that something was The Kiss. The Kiss created a vortex of sexy around Jake Johnson, absorbing everything into its path. Jess, you, me, probably Schmidt. Definitely Schmidt. And, now, it’s Nick’s world. We just want to kiss him on the face in it. — Courtney Enlow





7. Tom Hardy — Tom Hardy is one of those rare actors whose impressive musculature is backed by an equally impressive talent. If you’d not seen his terrifyingly physical and plumped-up performance in Bronson nor his simmering, broody Heathcliff, then his dapper, smooth as butter turn in Inception must have surely caught your attention. He’s a man who looks equally at home coolly quipping in a tux or wearing nothing but tattoos, sweat and desperation. With his mellow, honeyed baritone, his seemingly charmed family life and easy smile, it’s no surprise he’s won hearts. But it’s his ability to also be absolutely terrifying, to inhabit a role with every single rope of muscle in his body that makes him heart-stoppingly unforgettable. No wonder Christopher Nolan built an entire ad campaign around the curve of his Hardy’s back. Wouldn’t you? — Joanna Robinson





6. Emma Stone: — I almost feel guilty for objectifying Emma Stone because her goofy ways almost defy the wanton descriptors we use while attempting to list the ways we want to bang Hollywood starlets. But that’s what we’re doing here — objectifying the hell out of the lucky actors on this list — right? Let’s do this. Miss Emma is a natural blonde, and most people prefer her as a redhead, but to me, Emma Stone is at her best while sporting brunette locks and battling the comical undead in Zombieland. She can pull off comedy (Easy A), drama (The Help), and action (The Amazing Spider-Man) equally well. Sure, Emma may have gotten her start kissing Jonah Hill in Superbad and then went on to kiss several more dorks in other movies, but she comes by it honestly. At heart, Emma herself will always be a lovable dork (who just happens to be trapped in a hot chick’s body), but I’ll always come back to how well she kicked ass alongside Woody Harrelson. Mostly, I appreciate that Emma embraces her own natural skin color and doesn’t cover it all up with a ridiculous fake tan. To me, that simple decision communicates Emma’s refusal to completely turn into a cookie-cutter, showbiz entity. — Agent Bedhead







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Dustin is the founder and co-owner of Pajiba. You may email him here, follow him on Twitter, or listen to his weekly TV podcast, Podjiba.