After the nerd-tastic trailer round-up I ran on Monday, I figured the world of mini-movies and TV teasers would be all tapped out. And as usual, I was wrong AF!
Aladdin — In theaters May 24, 2019
This is a teaser trailer, so it was never going to give away
Will Smith as the Genie much. Frankly, I’m almost surprised it showed as much as it did. We got Iago, the grouchy tiger cave Cave of Wonders, and Aladdin himself. We even got the lamp! But like, we already KNOW this story — and the footage they offered gives us nothing new. It merely cements the fact that this isn’t a fresh take on the animated film, but a faithful remake of the animated film with, like, real people (including Mena Massoud as Aladdin, Naomi Scott as Jasmine, and Marwan Kenzari as Jafar). Which we mostly expected, but c’mon. As Roxana pointed out, they even used a CGI city in a CGI desert AS THOUGH REAL CITIES IN REAL DESERTS DON’T EXIST. Also, I had completely forgotten Guy Ritchie is directing this until the credits came up.
Glass — In theaters January 18, 2019
This is a new trailer for the movie that ties together M. Night Shyamalan’s Unbreakable and Split into one big shared superperson universe. Which honestly makes a great deal of sense for Universal, since their so-called “Dark Universe” monster mash-up universe seems to be going nowhere fast (I was gonna make an undead joke, but don’t want to waste braincells parsing whether a zombie joke would actually be fitting). However, the concept of this “Shyamal-universe” is a supposedly realistic take on comic book conventions. This trailer even hypes the idea that “Real Villains Are Among Us/ Real Heroes Are Within Us.” And yet — we know, Mr. Glass is a big ‘ol baddie because HE’S WEARING A MONOGRAMMED ASCOT. A… Glasscot, if you will:
That’s the most unrealistic thing in the whole trailer (and I love it).
The Best of Enemies — “Coming soon” to theaters
Based on real events, this movie follows the fight to desegregate schools in Durham, NC, in 1971. And it proves that Sam Rockwell is great at playing crazy racists… and Taraji P. Henson is great at EVERYTHING, ALWAYS.
Ben Is Back — In theaters December 7th
A feel-good family film about Julia Roberts and her addict son, Ben, who is… back. For the holidays! And then shit goes sideways. Look, this film is staunchly not my jam, but I’ll admit — the trailer kinda put a pit in my stomach. Also Ben is played by Lucas Hedges, whose father Peter is the director.
And speaking of holiday cheer…
Anna and the Apocalypse — In theaters November 30
This is the UK red band trailer, which gives you some new footage. Because I’m sure you’re like me and have been keeping a very close eye on this Zombie Christmas High School Musical. And don’t miss this clip featuring one of the original songs!
Time Freak — In theaters and On Demand November 9
Asa Butterfield plays Stillman, a genius who decides the only way to deal with his broken heart is to build a time machine. You know — as you do. So he and his buddy go back through the timeline of his relationship with
Sansa Stark Debbie (Sophie Turner) and try to right all the wrongs that made her dump his ass. I’m sure that’ll work out FLAWLESSLY. OK, fine, it probably WILL work out just fine, but I sort of wish this was the set up to a horror movie instead. What a twist that would be, eh?!
Robin Hood — In theaters November 21
Will this “sizzle” featurette make you “sizzle” with excitement? No really, I’m genuinely asking.
Honest Trailers takes on Doctor Who
Did you know The Doctor is “kind of a dick” and his greatest rival is Christmas? Did you know David Tennant is “the unquestioned master of staring sadly into the middle distance”? Did you know the series has featured every British actor from Harry Potter, Game of Thrones… and even the ones who showed up in BOTH Harry Potter and Game of Thrones? It’s all true!
And finally, this isn’t a trailer or a teaser, but it just makes me (hehehe) HAPPY!
It’s worth watching for Patton’s near spit-take about the person who watched the show with their 15-year-old. And, obviously, for Christopher Meloni’s everything.
Header Image Source: Walt Disney Studios