What If Fred Durst Was An Action Star, And John Travolta Stalked Him?

Here is a thing that is happening in the film world, presented in easy-to-digest bullet points because I’m honestly having a hard time wrapping my head around this news:

- John Travolta has just signed on to a new film called Moose.

- Moose was co-written by Limp Bizkit frontman Fred Durst, who will also direct the movie.

- Fred Durst directs movies now. This is his third.

- Unrelated: I never trust that I’m spelling “Limp Bizkit” correctly. It’s an unnatural combination of letters, sounds, and concepts that I can’t seem mentally accept. Much like this news story.

- Moose was loosely inspired by actual events in Durst’s life — namely, a time when he was stalked.

- In the film, Travolta will play the stalker, who is named “Moose”.

- In the film, Devon Sawa (from Idle Hands!) will play the famous person being stalked. Basically, he’s the Fred Durst character. Only he’s an action star, not a “Nookie” singer.

- Let me repeat. John Travolta has agreed to play Fred Durst’s stalker, in a script where Fred Durst is an action star and looks like the hot guy from Final Destination.

- My main takeaway from all this is that I want to rewatch Idle Hands.

- Did you know that the German title for Idle Hands was “Die Killerhand”?

This has been your daily reminder that sometimes the world isn’t good or bad — it’s just weird AF.