I Really Hope Martin Shkreli Watches the 'Sweet Girl' Trailer in Prison

By Nate Parker | Film | July 9, 2021 |

By Nate Parker | Film | July 9, 2021 |

You all remember Martin Shkreli, the sapient prolapsed anus currently doing time in federal prison for securities fraud. The hedge fund douche-bro became a figure of universal loathing in 2015 for raising the price of Daraprim, an anti-malarial medication primarily used by those suffering from toxoplasmosis, often due to AIDS. Under his direction, the price jumped from $13.50 to $750 per pill. It’s safe to say that although his convictions weren’t related to his habit of price gouging the sick and infirm, no one wept when he was sentenced to 7 years behind bars and forced to forfeit $4.7 million in assets, including the notorious secret Wu-Tang album.

Sweet Child isn’t about Martin Shkreli, but it might as well be. Ray Cooper (Jason Momoa, looking properly grim) promises to bring down the Shkreli-clone CEO (Justin Bartha) of a pharmaceutical company that pulled a promising cancer treatment right before his dying wife (Adria Arjona) could try it. Cooper is contacted by someone who claims they can help him find justice. Instead, Cooper and his daughter Rachel (Isabela Merced) are attacked, and things escalate from there. Take a look.

As Kristy put it this morning, I was not ready for that needle drop. It’s a hard left turn that takes us from “grieving father looks for justice from the courts\public opinion” to “Daddy Jason Bourne on the run.” The dramatic shift might make more sense if you know one of the writers, Gregg Hurwitz, is also responsible for The Book of Henry. The absolute bonkers movie became one of the first reasons to side-eye director Colin Treverrow’s attachment to the newest Star Wars trilogy, as well as explaining why the Jurassic World movies are… what they are. It nearly broke Kristy’s sanity, but at least it led to a movie review of sheer artistry. Sweet Girl’s director, Brian Andrew Mendoza, gets most of his experience as a producer on other Momoa projects, such as Frontier.

I think my biggest issue is their Shkreli stand-in, the as-yet-unnamed character played by Justin Bartha, is too attractive. I mean sure, he looks like a guy you can see denying sick people their medicine, but where’s the limp, greasy hair? Where’s the mouth like a puckered butthole? It’s a role begging for Jimmi Simpson, dammit!

Sweet Girl drops on Netflix on August 20. I don’t know about you, but I intend to check it out just to see where all this goes. Maybe Shkreli can watch it on a phone smuggled into his prison cell.