As we’ve previously discussed, this weekend a squad of clever celebrities took turns publicly dunking on on British television personality Piers Morgan, who is best described by Pajiba’s own Bekka Supp as “the end biological result of a weasel circle jerk where a wayward, dying earthworm choked on itself.”
But no one took more pleasure in the affair than author J.K. Rowling. Over the course of several tweets, she burned Morgan — who claims he’s never read a Harry Potter book in his life, despite obvious evidence otherwise — harder than a wayward Incendio spell. And y’all, he is still taking the bait from her. Just look at this. You could make so many Horcruxes out of this literal murder scene.
I suspect that most of you can guess via context clues who the writer of this lovely piece was, but you know who didn’t? (You do. You know who didn’t.)
That’s right, the writer. The passage is from a 2010 Daily Mail article in which Morgan outlines the 100 British celebrities who, by his own admission, “really matter.”
(Number 1 on that list, ironically? Simon Cowell. Sure, Piers. Sure.)
In the words of the greatest wizard of all, DJ Khaled: congratulations, Piers. You played yourself.