If Meghan Markle is anything like me (SPOILER: She isn’t), she will turn to horror movies for comfort in this time of change. There is nothing like watching a bunch of idiots fumble-f*ck around while a killer picks them off one by one. Surely Meghan can relate to seeing people grope around for control in a situation where it seems none exist and then laughing heartily when none of them have an amazing husband that puts their safety ahead of his royal titles, lands, and whatnot?
In the spirit of moving on, I’ve chosen some horror movies that Meghan may want to watch from her home in Canada, secure in the knowledge that the racist British papers can kiss her ass and woodland creatures will probably become her best friends.
Well, this one is just a no-brainer, isn’t it? A black woman seemingly accepted into a wealthy, white family only to learn that they don’t actually give two squirts of diamond-filled piss about keeping her safe hews very closely to the story presented by Jordan Peele. Obviously.
Meghan can cackle with glee as Chris (Daniel Kaluuya) burns the Armitage family’s generational family business TO THE GROUND.
Bear with me here. A young girl (Ana Taylor-Joy) is trapped in a family full of very specific rules and customs and see anything different as a bastardization of that requiring punishment. Maybe the Royal Family didn’t punish Meghan for existing but choosing to lean on Prince Andrew while never publicly chastising or thrashing British media for their treatment of her is six of one and half dozen of the other.
This is another one where Meghan can relate to the freeing ending.
Honestly? This connects to Meghan in no way, but she should really see James McAvoy’s performance and might be keen to watch more of Taylor-Joy after watching The Witch. It’s just a really great movie, Meghan!
Ready or Not
I’m not saying that the Royal Family unleashes rabid corgis on everyone that marries into the family but I am saying I would not be surprised to find they had a pact with a demon.
Meghan knows all too well how it plays out when you fall in love and feel less than wanted or just not good enough for your betrothed’s family so she’ll connect with Grace (Samara Weaving) on that level. I’m 100% certain she’ll enjoy how Grace plays the game by the Le Domas tradition’s rules - on her own terms.
Header Image Source: Fox Searchlight Pictures