Count How Many Times Charming Potato Removes His Shirt in Last Night's "Saturday Night Live"
Things I learned about "SNL" hosts Charming Potato last night: 1) He's an even worse actor than I previously believed; 2) he has absolutely no sense of comic timing; 3) and I think I like him even more. Somehow, Tatum has been given the gift of Keanu: Extremely likable despite no discernible talent. Hell, even when Tatum tries to make fun of his own lack of talent, it comes off bad, and yet, I like him even more for it.
It was still a fairly bad "SNL." Here are the highlights:
Sci-Fi Movie Cold Open
I'm embedding this here just so you will all know exactly what the worst cold open in "SNL" history looks like.
Channing Tatum Monologue
He makes fun of the fact that he was once a stripper, and even his self-deprecation is off-key. He's completely without talent! This monologue is atrocious! And yet it endeared me to Tatum. He tries so hard, y'all.
Getting Freaky with Cee Lo
Another awful skit that I am embedding because Charming Potato does a dreadful Matthew McConaughey impression, and yet, it's hard to look away. This is seriously unfunny. Watch!
There were three legitimately funny skits last night. The first was a Spike commercial for Downton Abbey (which isn't embeddable, but it was the night's biggest highlight), and the other two good moments were during Weekend Update. Here's Bobby Moynihan's Guy Fieri (finally, a reason for Moynihan to exist).
Here's Kristen Wiig as Lana Del Rey mocking the assholes (like us!) who mocked Lana Del Rey's "SNL" performance. It's very meta, but also crazy spot-on.
Tom Brady & Janet
Tom Brady was one of the worst hosts in the history of "SNL" and somehow, Channing Tatum as Tom Brady is even worse than Tom Brady as Tom Brady. But again, Channing's Keanu mojo is captivating.
Finally, Charming Potato's Best Worst performance of the night. If his awfulness hasn't completely won you over yet, this should do the trick.
And for your listening enjoyment, here are the two Bon Iver performances. Can we just make them the permanent musical guests?
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