Pajiba

Hahahahah! Fantastic.

Mmmm Keamy. I really don't know what it is, but mmmmm.

The 'magician' guy in Sherlock Holmes. Mark Strong? *yummy deelish*

Oh shit, I forgot about Mark Strong -- Lord evil something in Young Victoria, and Septimus in Stardust.

Oh crap! How could I have forgotten:

Nathan Fillion as Caleb in BTVS.

P.S. Cillian Murphy equally hot and evil in Red Eye.

Ha! The list turned out awesome. God damn I love me some Titus Welliver. He was equally hot all be-bearded in Deadwood.

YES to Mark Strong, Fillion, and Marsters-as-Spike.

Also, I feel compelled to add Russell Crowe in Virtuosity. It's a bad movie, but oh so worth it.

Large percentage of British on the list. Is it the voices?

Denzel is brilliant when he's bad. It's the only time I can stomach him.

No Danny Devito as The Penguin? This list is Spciesist!

Admin! My friend Chris suggested Penguin on Friday!

Also, James Marsters is always sexy. He's like sex in man-shaped form who exudes a near-palpable aura of panty-wetness.

The same could be said about Skaaaarsgaaaaaard.

I have to admit that I find all this Keamy-love baffling. I don't hate the guy -- I just find him entirely unmemorable. I'm fully on board with the rest of the list, though, especially Cillian Murphy. Is he creepy and psychotic-looking, or is he one step below the angels? YES! (Now I need to go stare at photos of Mr. Murphy all afternoon, in the interest of research, of course.)

Dear John Hart. Please be my boyfriend.

Yours,

Heather
xoxo

Oooooh Karl Urban! I watched that movie repeatedly just for him.

To whoever asked: yes, it's mostly the accents. Specially with Alan Rickman. That voice? Yow.

Also: a very big thanks to Julie, lizzie, AvB, Melody and Nicole for their suggestions. Thank them for the inclusion of Whovians and Whedonites, since I am ignorant.

Bad Denzel...yummmmmmmmeeeeeeee!(and also I want...but not really cuz he's baaaaaad)

BWeaves, don't forget, Fillian as good guy/bad guy Captain Hammer (corporate tool).

Timothy Olyphant in Die Harder Already Yippee Ky...whatever?

David Tennant also as Barty Crouch...Jr?

Gary Oldman in The Professional (Leon) or...damn near anything else.

Lowslash, I'm not sure if it's possible for MM not to be sexcellent.

I just want to add a few things here from my own perspective.

Alan Rickman IS Severus Snape! I've read the entire series and couldn't think of a better actor to play that part. It doesn't hurt that he's a brilliant actor as well.

Add James Marsters and John Simm to my list of man crushes. I absolutely love the part of "The Master" and watches "Life on Mars" because Simm was in it. He's another actor I'm glad I found on BBC.

The character of John Hart is such a wicked bastard and what Captain Jack could have very easily become that it's great to watch him in action.

Some on the list I'm unfamiliar with, but I'm certain that each of them brings that certain bit of elan to the role that permanently makes it their own. (Yes, I know that Simm is just one more incarnation of "The Master" but still...)

Great list.

I remember when Batman came out and there was a ton of Joker love - oh he's so sexy, etc. and there was a small, but sane, minority that said, WHAT?! He's a scarred psychopath, etc. It's not him you find sexy, it's Heath Ledger and his acting that is attractive.

Same thing here. Seriously, would anyone ever want to fuck one these assholes if they met them in real life? No, just no. These guys aren't sexy, the actors are, sure, but that's a different story.

The only thing inexplicable about this list is the premise. Why not call this list what it is, a list of sexy guys who have played bad guys on film. Whoop dee doo.

I want to have sex with Alan Rickman's voicebox.

True, we'd go through the difficulty of being from two separate worlds (with me being from the US, and he from deep inside the respiratory system of a British man) but no matter our struggles, we'd always find ourselves back with each other, for he is everything I am not--deep, nasally, and drollingly memorable while mine is feminine and forgettable. My parents would forbid me from seeing him, saying that he is not my type and "what would the neighbors say?" But we don't care what anyone else thinks, and in the dark of one night we would run off and elope.

Then - years down the road - we would have children. And those infant larynxes wouldn't even bother me with their whining and crying, because they have a bit of their father in them. I would listen to them cry all day long, not feeling the need to stop them and get them what they need. Eventually, my neglect of the larynxes for the benefit of my ears would lead to their death, for which I am held responsible and imprisoned. I use my one phone call on my beau -- Alan Rickman's voicebox-- who admits that I am irresponsible and doesn't think he'll be able to look at me the same way after I get out of the big house. He is leaving me. I no longer have the will to live.

Yeah, nevermind. On second thought, I'll go with Cillian Murphy.

HA! I was waiting for someone to Not Get It. Really, if you can't understand it...well you just can't. It's a lame defense, I know, but getting into the WHY is an exercise in futility.

YES! Gary Oldman, thank you dammitjanet, perfect addition.

Remember Tom Cruise as Lestat?
:moist:

There's no shame in my game, ladies, I love that movie.

I second Kayanne's objection. Eric is not a villain. He's not even a low-level boss. He's more of a shady informant. He really, really wants to keep the vampires in his Area safe.

Ssssssssh, Kate...let's not get into insignificant details....let's just...stare. *shifty eyed*

Here's a couple more I would've included:

1) Liam Neeson in Batman Begins
2) Gary Oldman in The Professional
3) Sylar in Heroes (even if I only watched one season of that)
4) Doc Ock in Spiderman 2 (um...maybe that's just me)

I'm going to be the 8,143 person to add James Marsters as Spike. Absolutely my #1 fictional crush at the moment (and he has been for quite a while.)

Of course, my very first villain crush still hasn't made it to the screen...but if anybody ever pulls off an acceptable Raistlin in a movie or TV show, Spike might have some serious competition.

Keamy? Really? I don't get it. He's rather rabbity looking in my opinion!

Hugo Weaving - Agent Smith?

Ooh, Sam Rockwell in Charlie's Angels. Agreed. I also said Crispin Glover, either in CA or in Willard or in Alice. Not attractive, per se, but there's just something about him when he's all evil like that that just... gets me. Right in my lady parts.

Same thing with Keamy, for me. He's not traditionally good-looking, but so, so hot, and with the piercing eyes. It *is* a very primal sort of thing, I suppose, though I don't find it troubling. On the contrary, I find it hot. I also said Malcolm McDowell in A Clockwork Orange, so there you go. I like them rough, I suppose.

RR + geep, we should TOTES Skype that. If I ever get a web cam.

Hell yes to most of these. Marsters was delicious as Spike, but Rickman has my heart now. I've been renting every single thing he's been in lately, regardless of quality (and holy shit, Mesmer is a mess of a film, but Rickman is GORGEOUS in it). Nobel Son is due to arrive any day. I may now be unemployed and poor, but I'll be damned if I give up my Netflix.

Big D, you're making a huge assumption. Considering some of the super sexy whack jobs I dated, I could very well see myself going for one of these deliciously unstable men.

The actors, I might like to have tea with, or perhaps a delightful assignation. With the villains, I'd engage in a long-term, mutually destructive relationship. Because sometimes, I just don't learn. Granted, I prefer angry, violent and driven to squirrely and psychopathic, so I'd be more inclined to pursue numbers 6, 5, 3 and 2. I'd go for 8, but the character simply doesn't allow for that sort of distraction.

Now THIS is a sexy list! And YES to whoever mentioned James Spader in Pretty in Pink. Oh, how I would hatef*ck that man.

I love "Black Firefly Assassin #2!"
I really enjoyed the day when I watched the final episode of Firefly immediately followed by Serenity and saw the two black assassins in a row. Although I think I liked BFA1 better.

RE ninetwenteetoo: "To those of you saying that it's not "inexplicable" because all these men are attractive, I think the point of the list (and the inexplicable part) is that these men seem so much hotter when they play bad guys than when they play good guys, even though their appearance hasn't changed. It is somewhat inexplicable (at least in the nice, succinct way people generally like to explain things) why women are attracted to a bad boy, but we just are."

Unless Christian Bale or Chiwetel Ejiofor play a role in which they are the villain, 100 pounds overweight and also covered with warts, no, they're attractive no matter what role they're playing.

Also, this isn't your fault and no reason why you should care, but I hate the phrase "bad boy." Another word for it is "asshole." Women say "bad boy" so they don't seem so stupid for hooking up with an obvious asshole.

People like to hang out with and/or fuck attractive people. It's why so many attractive people are assholes (not saying they all are, and believe me, I know plenty of unattractive people who are colossal assholes as well). Pretty people are allowed to get away with it, up to a point. It's like a "get out of jail free" card for a lot of shit.

Slash - Not disagreeing that people just like attractive people in general, just pointing out the incongruency that, for example, Christian Bale somehow seems MORE attractive as Bateman than he does as Batman. I can think of no explanation for why, considering his face, body, etc haven't really changed. In my opinion this qualifies as an "inexplicable" phenomenon. But it's all subjective anyway - I'm sure there is someone out there who does find him hotter when he plays a "good guy." I'm just presenting my reasoning for why the "inexplicable" adjective works.
That said, it would be interesting to see if women would still find Bale etc. hot if they were a little pudgier but playing a really despicable villian as you suggested above.

so, I guess women never really grow out of the whole bad-boy thing, eh? (note to self: scratch reform off of to-do list)

luthien, if that's wrong, then I never, ever want to be right. Or even half-right. Or even in the ballpark of right.

So, so delicious.

Darth Maul was so evil and so hot. I'll bet he could really bring the noise.

Lucien: I maintain that C. Murphy is the best-looking actor out there today.

RE ninetwenteetoo: "Not disagreeing that people just like attractive people in general, just pointing out the incongruency that, for example, Christian Bale somehow seems MORE attractive as Bateman than he does as Batman. I can think of no explanation for why, considering his face, body, etc haven't really changed."

Because "heroes" (as most are written for movies and TV) are boring. But I suspect a lot of the movie/TV villains are not all that exciting, either, it's just that you don't have to live with them, you just have to watch them onscreen for a couple hours. Believe me, if you hung out with Christian Bale as the "American Psycho" guy any longer than that, you'd find him boring, too. Both heroes and villains in movies are written as tiresome obsessives. Just a step above people in the midst of the latest diet craze or born-again Jesus freaks. In the movies, they have screenwriters to put clever words in their mouth. In real life, clever and fascinating villains are about as numerous as they are in the general population, which is to say, not very. Mostly, they're just assholes.

Bale is hot as hell in "American Psycho," but I'd find it difficult to keep a straight face as he went on about how awesome Phil Collins is. He's played by Bale as a preening, boorish dick. Which is why his performance is amusing to watch. It certainly helps that he's also attractive. I doubt many women would be swooning over the Bateman character if he'd been played by Danny Devito or Steve Buscemi.

Women's attraction to attractive actors playing criminals in the movies says more about women's reaction to attractive men than anything else. For some reason, many women are reluctant to admit that they're just as shallow as men are when it comes to looks. Just admit you want to bone somebody because he's attractive to you.

I'm replacing Russell Crowe from Virtuosity with Russell Crowe in 3:10 to Yuma, he was SOOO hot in that movie.

David Bowie counts as a villain in "The Labyrinth", doesn't he? I mean... the hair, the make-up - and by GODS, the pants!

Ben Wishaw in "The Perfume" anyone?

Aaand... Malcom McDowell's Alex de Large? At least in that full-frontal scene in that milk bar, with that LOOK...

And for some reason I just really fell for Rutger Hauer's Roy in Blade Runner. Must be the eyes, too.

Some villains just make me tingly in the nice places. Actually, the only one who doesn't is the guy from Pan's Labyrinth. He could be really attractive, but he just scares the moisture out of me. Oh well.

Ian Somerhalder as Damon in Vampire Diaries. Mmm.

Robert Patrick in Terminator 2 also has those blue eyes that make me weak in the knees.

It's not even inexplicable.
We're bitchy, sometimes terrible people on this site.
As such, true and well-acted evil is fucking sexy.
I'm a straight male. And I would have wild sex with a well acted male villain. And I'm proud of it!

Ahem, you know we love you, figgy, but why are you wasting your time on trivial male handsomeness when it's Monday and we are waiting for Eloquent Eloquence?

We want Eloquent Eloquence!
/rattles tin cup on prison bars

Jareth? Labyrinth?
Hello?

Cillian Murphy should get moved up to 1. He was hot in Red Eye as well.

Your list is faaaaabulous.

I would add Michael Ironside at #11 (pick any movie where he plays a baddie).

For some reason, many women are reluctant to admit that they're just as shallow as men are when it comes to looks. Just admit you want to bone somebody because he's attractive to you.

There's no mysterious "some reason" about that at all. But hopefully our grand-daughters, at least, won't have to worry about that.

A-schaef, you have no idea how turned on I am now...

Thank fucking GOD. I thought I was the only one in the world who found Cillian Murphy so smoking hot! All my friends declare me crazy.

Also, Lost's MIB? Thaaaaank you, been thinking that one for a long time.

Cillian Murphy tops this for me. He was just so unbelievably hot with his lips and glasses and guhhhh. Never thought that the Scarecrow would be bangable, but there you go.

Gwenbear,

I have never posted before but your comment compelled me to do so. In grade 8 I fell into a pretty deep depression when my nerd-girl self came to terms with the fact that I would never figure into a Raistlin/Caramon sandwich. Sigh.

Michael C Hall as Dexter. I don't want him redeemed, I want his bad, psychotic, serial-killer self just as he is. Yum. Especially in that clingy khaki shirt he wears for all his killing and dismembering.

Nathan Fillon as Caleb on Buffy season seven...

@lolo - I'm glad I'm not the only one who fell for a fictional gold-skinned, scary-eyed evil wizard. Caramon never did it for me though. Now a Raistlin/Dalamar sandwich - THAT could have been amazing.

And on a completely not-Dragonlance related note, I can't believe I forgot Jareth! I guess I just found him too sympathetic to consider him a villain.

And can I suggest one more addition? Anthony Hopkins as Hannibal Lecter. So evil, but so damn attractive...that VOICE...

Oh, and JD in Heathers! "Our love is god!"

and #1 - a crazy, obsessed baddie in Disco Pigs. He was just too cute in that movie.

Ok, I've said my fangirl peace...

Posted by: bubblegumshoe at June 21, 2010 6:30 PM

Come on! Cillian wasn't a "baddie" in Disco Pigs in any sense of the word. He was just a very disturbed kid (and adorable to boot).

i'm shirtless right now are you impressed with me figgy?

Umm, I have to second Bill the Butcher. So hot.

And Keamy!

And ABSOLUTELY YES for Keamy. He was so slimy and despicable and I absolutely despised him... but... for some unfathomable reason... I'd love to hit it.

I've seen bale in lots of stuff, big and small. but i cant see him as a hero or sane since American Psychox, he nailed it too much

You forgot Voldemort. Mm.
Posted by: bella

OMG I thought I was the ONLY person who thought Voldemort was attractive lol!
And I also thought I was the only one who thought The Man in Black was attractive in Lost, so glad to know I'm not the only one & Christian Bale in American Psycho was just pure SEX, YUM

I'm with Natalie, The Kurgen is complete do-me-now hotness.

And after just finishing yet another Oz marathon, I'd add some of those boys to the list. As I can't have 'em all (though I'd certainly like to try), let's go for the two who no matter how evil, would get my knickers dropping in the blink of an eye: Simon Adebisi and Ryan O'Reilly.

Add Darth Vader...............dude is sexy! Holy Crap i'm such a nerd.

Tim Curry as Cardinal Richelieu. Mon Dieu! That man just makes me go mmm-mmm-mmm.

+1 Joaquin Phoenix in Gladiator