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Ivanka-Trump-teaches-Iowa-how-to-caucus.jpg

Ivanka, Let's Get Real

By Kristy Puchko | Politics | November 7, 2016 |

By Kristy Puchko | Politics | November 7, 2016 |


It must be a nightmare to be Ivanka Trump right now. Her family is constantly in the news, being judged from every angle from failed Twitter outreach to blatant anti-Semitism. And through all of it, she has to stand by her dad/boss/creeper Donald Trump. She has to smile blandly as he talks about Mexicans being rapists. She has to insist Trump is better for working women than an actual working woman with a history of advocacy. She has to defend her father even after multiple accusations of sexual assault, including the upcoming rape case involving a 13-year-old girl. She has to hear over and over again that her dad thinks it’s totes cool to “grab ‘em by the pussy.” But November 8th is nearly here. And once she gets in that voting booth, no one needs to know she’s with her.

College Humor is reaching out to Ivanka—and all the conservative women trying their damndest to believe Trump is a candidate who gives a single fuck about them—with “Ivanka, We’re Here For You.”

In related news, Ivanka is reportedly worried the Republican Babadook’s behavior is hurting her business. Because yeah. #GrabYourWallet

Kristy Puchko is trying to remember a time before this perpetual tightness in her chest.