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Literally Everyone You Know Is Tired Of Stupid Watergate

By Emily Chambers | Last Week Tonight | May 22, 2017 |


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Leave it to Trump to somehow even fuck up his own undoing.

Trump is bad at nearly everything (and I do mean everything) so the fact that he’s bad at being president isn’t surprising. The break-neck pace at which he’s proving how bad he is at everything? No one expected that. Which is why John Oliver and Last Week Tonight dedicated a full twenty-four minutes of a thirty-minute show just to cover what happened in the last week. No really.

That’s how bad just this past week has been. It’s so bad that you can’t remember which bad thing happened on Monday. It’s so bad that the sitting President of the United States passed classified intel from Israel to actual Russian spies, and that’s like the third top story. It’s so bad that the guys over at Pod Save America made it through nearly an entire episode’s worth of material before being reminded, “Oh, right, and there was that small news piece about how a special prosecutor’s been named.” It’s so bad we need spreadsheets to keep track of how bad it is.

And it’s completely exhausting.

As Oliver mentions in the video, we seem to be in little danger of getting used to the abnormal state of a Trump presidency. Because there’s literally no time to adjust to one revelation before a second washes over you. Which opens us up to an entirely new threat: fatigue. Not resistance fatigue. Not “spinning our wheels, making no progress” fatigue. But “Jesus, what could he possibly have done today?” fatigue. And that kind of fatigue is slightly harder to resist because it feels so overwhelming.

My advice? Let it wash over you. Don’t try to learn the specifics of each new scandal. Trump knew Michael Flynn was under investigation before he hired him? File that away under the “Trump, Flynn, Dipshit” category. There’s no new information, and when there is, there will be another story about it. Instead try, in any ways possible, to keep the OG Watergate ethos alive and follow the money. Trump doesn’t want to be president, most of the country doesn’t want him to be president, so why is he? Because Kreacher the House Elf Jeff Sessions wants to put black men in jails. Because Mike Pence wants to torture gay people. Because Dead Eyed Paul Ryan wants to give tax cuts to millionaires. The people around Trump have identifiable goals concerning money and/or power, and they are the reason Trump isn’t being pushed out of office any time soon (I’m still banking 50/50 odds on him quitting within the year because he’s a whiny cry baby). Trump is an easy target for rage, but focusing too much on his behavior will make you crazy. Keep yourself sane, and start an Arya Stark Revenge List for midterms: Paul Ryan, Mitch McConnell, Randy Hultgren, Orrin Hatch, Kevin McCarthy …



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