Prep For the Return of 'The Americans' With the Show's Best and Worst Wigs

Season three of FX’s sexy spy thriller The Americans premieres tonight, and if you’re not planning on watching, I have to ask— WHY THE HELL NOT? If you’ve never seen the show, there is a lot that you’re missing out on. Most notable, perhaps, is the impressive array of disguises. These characters have more wigs than Sydney Bristow and Peggy Carter combined. Here’s a ranking of some of the best, worst, and Clarkiest of the bunch.

Best First Wig: This number from the opening scene of the pilot

Clarkiest Wig: Oh, Clark. Your fake wife DEFINITELY has no idea you wear a toupee.

The Wig Most Likely to Have Been Ripped Off a True Detective Stand-In

The Most Definitely Self-Cut Bangs

The Deschanel-iest Wig

Gingeriest Wig: Matthew Rhys Edition

Gingeriest Wig: Keri Russell

Best Fake Family Resemblance (It’s all in the glasses)

Most Murderous Grandma

Groucho-est Get Up

Best Helmet

Just the Absolute Worst Face Merkin

The Best Thing Anyone Has Ever Worn In the History of Everything