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Titanically Awesome

By TK | Posted Under Film Reviews | Comments (64)



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If I had to sum up Clash of the Titans in one word, that word would simply be “wow.” Because while it may not be the perfect movie, its the perfect blend of action, adventure and yes, even romance. It’s destined to be a mega-blockbuster, and it deserves every dollar it earns. Warner Brothers has done exactly what should be done with a reimagining — take everything that was good about the so-so original, and make it bigger and better.

The movie shoots along at a quick pace, but it’s still manages to be smart enough to make you think about it. Its PG-13 rating is just about right — it’s a little too intense for the kiddies, but parents will love it, and the older teen crowds will be clapping their hands with delight (I was tempted to do so myself). The short version, for those who haven’t figured out the plot, is that there’s conflict between the ancient Greeks and the petty Gods that they worship. The people are mad because the Gods take and take and give nothing back, and the Gods are mad at their upstart ways. One man, Perseus (Sam Worthington), stands against them, and teams up with a team of renegades to fight back, as well as save the life of his beloved Andromeda (Alexa Davalos).

It’s rollicking good fun. Worthington continues his trend of being an A+ action star — building on his deep, impressive performance in Avatar, he’s everything a hero should be — noble, tough, and handsome as all get-out. Similarly, Davalos is beautiful and suitably sexy as Andromeda, and provides some extra eye candy to accompany all the action. Of course, the action is, unsurprisingly, the best part. Full of eye-popping special effects, Clash of the Titans makes for a far more enjoyable viewing experience than the 1981 original. Sure, it was fun Saturday viewing when we were kids, but the original has aged pretty terribly, and the claymation effects are sort of silly when you look back at it — not believable at all. Plus, great as Lawrence Olivier was way back when, Liam Neeson, looking resplendant and appropriately god-like, really blows him away.

The special effects, mixed with hard-hitting action, make for an enjoyable spectacle. The gods, also featuring Ralph Fiennes, are amazingly portrayed, and Perseus and his gritty band of comrades are excellent. Like I said, it just took everything from the original and made it better — including the very-smart decision to omit the silly mechanical bird from the 1981 version, a dorky addition that would have been even more out of place here. Clash of the Titans is smarter than that — it’s a thinking man’s action movie, with little room for silliness. But its also just plain fun — from beginning to end. And the end! By now, you’ve seen the trailers, so you know about the new, redesigned Kraken monster. This one is no clunky, rubbery-looking Godzilla wannabe, like the original one. It’s a great big scary force of nature, and that final battle is breathtaking!

It’s surprising that Warner Brothers didn’t use it as a summer tentpole flick, but if anything else, that makes us wonder what other greats they have in the hopper to amaze us with this year. While not a perfect flick, this one is still good enough for four out of five !’s.

Trust me!

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Comments

FIRST!

Posted by: Optimus Rhyme at April 1, 2010 10:22 AM

Well, you've sold me. I'm off to see it RIGHT NOW!

Posted by: greg at April 1, 2010 10:22 AM

FIRST!

I So Won!

Best day of my life!

Posted by: Magiel at April 1, 2010 10:22 AM

I'm so CONFUUUSED!

Posted by: superasente at April 1, 2010 10:23 AM

Only four !'s out of five?!

It must suck then! I will not go see it!

Posted by: Jerce at April 1, 2010 10:24 AM

You know I had to do a quick scroll down to make sure there were no surprises. I will nevah trust you again, you bastard. I mean, you meanie.

Posted by: Cindy at April 1, 2010 10:25 AM

So my phone rings - it's Louis Leterrier - & 10 hours later, I'm standing right in the center of Mount Olympus!

Just pure popcorn fun!

Posted by: the new transported man at April 1, 2010 10:25 AM

seriously? or is this an april fool's day joke?

Posted by: gem at April 1, 2010 10:26 AM

*really depressed, and going to hit refresh 1500 times to see if there is a new entry*

*AND dislikes Optimus, but not much, because that would be the Old Negative Ways*

Posted by: Magiel at April 1, 2010 10:27 AM

This movie sounds awesome.

I am so totally going to marry Sam Worthington. Great actor + handsome + kind + humble = BFF (boy friend forever) = husband. Plus, I'm Australian, so I wouldn't even have to move or anything.

Posted by: JJ McClay at April 1, 2010 10:29 AM

You're totes magotes going to get blurbed now, TK!

Posted by: branded at April 1, 2010 10:30 AM

WHAT ABOUT THE 3D!?!?!?!?!

HOW AWESOME WAS THE 3D?!?!?!

And are there any boobs?

There were boobs in the first one.

Posted by: Forbiddendonut at April 1, 2010 10:32 AM

FIRST!

I So Won!

Best day of my life!

Posted by: Magiel at April 1, 2010 10:22 AM

Ha Ha!

FAIL!11!!!!1

Posted by: Forbiddendonut at April 1, 2010 10:33 AM

While I may disagree with their decision to remove Bubo (hell fell down a cliff! It was SO FUNNY!), I think all the CGI action is going to more than make up for it.

The Kraken looks simply stunning and EPIC, and if Worthington can live up to his incredible performance in Avatar, I think we just might have a new stellar blockbuster on our hands!

Posted by: Snath at April 1, 2010 10:36 AM

But how was the cinematography? And the score? Or the EDITING?? HOW BIG IS SAM WORTHINGTON'S PENIS????!!!! NEWPAJIBAPANTS, why won't you give me the answers I crave?!

Posted by: Julie at April 1, 2010 10:36 AM

I'm suspicious that this sparkling review might be an April fools joke and that the movie is ACTUALLY horrible.

Anyone else get that idea?

Posted by: Dangerous Dave at April 1, 2010 10:37 AM

4 out of 5 exclamation points! Wow! I can't wait to see this!! I mean, Ray Harry-WHO?! Pssh. And no stupid flying mechanical owl, I hope.

Posted by: Anna von Beaverplatz at April 1, 2010 10:38 AM

Sam is sooo the new RDJ, maybe even better!

Posted by: Magiel at April 1, 2010 10:38 AM

Ya gotta be THIRSTY for the FIRSTY.

Posted by: Optimus Rhyme at April 1, 2010 10:43 AM

april foolz

Posted by: ladyayane at April 1, 2010 10:45 AM

Arnie says "[removed for profanity]"

Posted by: rg at April 1, 2010 10:46 AM

TK, this is your best review EVAR. All that Stephanie Meyers reading you have been doing has really paid off! (Don't deny it she is the gradest writer ever and I know you luv her like I do.)

Posted by: Ranylt at April 1, 2010 10:47 AM

FRIST!

lol11

Posted by: stopthemadness at April 1, 2010 10:48 AM

What's incredible is about half the article actually sounds legit. Consider this review a success.

Posted by: kelsy at April 1, 2010 10:51 AM

I like that alternate reality TK is still only tempted to "clap with delight". I think I would rather watch that happen then sit through "Clash". Oh come on, clap with motherfucking delight! It's good for the soul. Larry King said so on the poster for Paul Blart. "It made me crap with delight!" said Larry. Because he is a billion years old, has horrible taste in movies, and is incontinent.

Posted by: TylerDFC at April 1, 2010 10:53 AM

I'm with Jules...can we get a Comment Diversion to speculate on the relative penis size/attractiveness of our fave stars! I think that would be kick ass!!!!

Posted by: Smokin at April 1, 2010 10:55 AM

Um, yay?

Wait, sorry... *recalibrating.*

YAAAAY!!1!! Sam Worth!ngton is so HOTT!!! I am sooo there, like, ASAP! LMAO!! ROFL!!!

Posted by: Katers at April 1, 2010 10:57 AM

Sure it is a fun, good looking action movie, but a thinking man's action movie????
The omission of a mechanical bird and the lack claymation does not make it a thinking man's action movie.
Hell no, its not even close. Prove it!!!
Sponsored by WB.......

Posted by: bob at April 1, 2010 10:58 AM

Just got back from seeing it, and wow 4x !!!!'s from me too.

The movie was just so !!!! that nothing esle can compare to it.

The story, oh by the gods the story.

The Action, oh all of that action!!!!

And those authentic accents, its truely remarkable how fine a job they did with the authenticity.

And the names of the characters, they are so easy to remember, with Perceas and umm, and..... Sam Worthington everybody!!!!

And that " clash " of the titans. Everybody wont know what hit them. There was just so much clashing going on, my eyes are all soiled!!!!

The acting was a modern day marvel, did i mention that before? No? well, yowza, blew my pants off.


.....Cant keep doing this..... but cant............. ruin................... the joke........

............Must click post comment or......else...............!!!!

Posted by: Sostra at April 1, 2010 11:01 AM

@ Julie: Shush. Zeus can't hear you complain from his beautifully rendered mountains.

I REALLY can't wait to see this movie now!!!!!

Posted by: Natalie at April 1, 2010 11:01 AM

April Fools day?!?!?

Posted by: Seth at April 1, 2010 11:02 AM

"It’s rollicking good fun."

seriously? if Pajiba 2.0 uses stupid ass phrases like this, I'm gonna vomit.

Posted by: sgt slaughter at April 1, 2010 11:03 AM

april fools.

Posted by: mike at April 1, 2010 11:12 AM

More like Pajiba 2.AWESOME!!!11! AmIright?

Posted by: branded at April 1, 2010 11:14 AM

It's nice to get away from all the negativity of the world, come to the land of hugs and butterfly kisses, and be embraced by such a celebratory review - really, I'm getting quite emotional!
It's just... it's just so damn BEAUTIFUL!

-loan tear of happiness-

Posted by: squeeziee at April 1, 2010 11:15 AM

But can I take my grandma to it?

Posted by: gunnertec at April 1, 2010 11:20 AM

if only I knew how to use emoticons...I feel like they would be appropriate right about now LOL

Posted by: Alarmjaguar at April 1, 2010 11:36 AM

but!!!! you guys are [deleted] around here aren't you?

I kinda really do want it to be watchable.

Posted by: deadpancakes at April 1, 2010 11:37 AM

Frickin' sweet, that's what this is. Trust me? Oh, I trust you, TK. I trust you.

It's nice to get away from all the negativity of the world, come to the land of hugs and butterfly kisses...

Don't forget rainbows! I come here for the rainbows!

Posted by: Brie at April 1, 2010 11:44 AM

I saw it! An honest to GODness good time! rollercoaster epic of fun!

Posted by: figgy at April 1, 2010 11:46 AM

You are playing with fire, Pajiba. Some movie exec is going to find this and use it as proof that the movie was awesome and 'everybody loves it'.

Posted by: Hayden Tompkins at April 1, 2010 11:48 AM

it's an April's fool !!!!

Posted by: caro at April 1, 2010 11:50 AM

I'm gonna release my kraken for you to kiss.

HAHA!!!

Posted by: Janey at April 1, 2010 11:51 AM

Were there pizza rolls served? I'm all about the pizza rolls here people. Will there be some sort of giveaway? I was hoping for a 3D Sam Worthington poster, or a Kraken flavored Slurpee (release the grape!), or maybe a Pegasus plush toy? At least tell me when the Happy Meal drops, because if I don't get ALL the collectables there's going to be issues. IN THE ORIGINAL PACKAGING!!!

Posted by: Mrcreosote at April 1, 2010 12:03 PM

This is an April Fools joke, isn't it.

Posted by: enygma_6 at April 1, 2010 12:04 PM

Hate to break it to you, but [edited for spoilers - TK]

Posted by: Peanut_Butter_And_James at April 1, 2010 12:10 PM

Do you not understand about SPOILERS PB&J!!!!!!!

Thanks for totally RUINING the movie. Jeez.

Posted by: Wednesday at April 1, 2010 12:19 PM

Yay, I'm so glad it's aweso... wait... is this an April Fool's joke?

Posted by: E at April 1, 2010 12:41 PM

Finally Hollywood is making original films again!

Posted by: admingirl186 at April 1, 2010 12:47 PM

THIRTY-NINTH!!!!!!

Posted by: Kballs at April 1, 2010 1:11 PM

I will go see it knowing well that:

- Sam Worthington cannot carry the hairy-chested codpiece of Harry Hamlin.

- All that CGI cannot equal the beauty of Harryhausen.

- It's likely going to touch the front part of my childhood.

At least, I got the DVD to remind me of the better Clash of the Titans.

Posted by: Fredo at April 1, 2010 1:24 PM

I think I got to 'deep, impressive performance in Avatar' before I realized this was a joke.

Posted by: Steph at April 1, 2010 2:06 PM

I so totally loved this movie. Kate Winslett. Leo DeCaprio. It's so sweet. And when they hook up on the Pegasus down in the ship's hold it's HAWT. I even sniffled a bit at the end, but that's OK 'cuz nobody saw.

I heard it's a true story too. (For REALZ!) They found the boat in the ocean lying on piles of Kraken-ed ice.

Posted by: BierceAmbrose at April 1, 2010 3:02 PM

I'm so stoked that a production of this significance is /finally/ getting the attention it /deserves/.

Is it okay to post links to our CotL fan fiction?

Posted by: Corvus at April 1, 2010 3:04 PM

I am glad to see a moderate amount of decorum has been reached on this website.
I look forward to more wonderful reviews in this fashion. Anything else would be utterly unpatriotic.

- Sam The Eagle

Posted by: Sam The Eagle at April 1, 2010 3:25 PM

"It's rollicking good fun."

"It’s a great big scary force of nature, and that final battle is breathtaking."

OMG TK!

You've honed your skills to a razor sharp edge. Thanks for elevating Pajiba's critical style!

Posted by: NeoCleo at April 1, 2010 4:24 PM

Sam W is the new male Meryl Streep!

Posted by: caro at April 1, 2010 4:29 PM

Happy april fool's day to you too?

Posted by: Perx at April 1, 2010 4:34 PM

God. Damn. It. I'm NOT seeing it if there's no little clockwork owl. Forget it.

Although I can't wait to see the real review. This was highly amusing, but I'm certain that you;ll have some choice words about the film tomorrow, TK!

Posted by: AnnArrogance at April 1, 2010 6:54 PM

I genuinely thought Worthington was very good in Avatar. The flaw in his performance is the inconsistency of his accent. He hits a great range of emotion with his physicality and really committed to some pretty heinous dialog.

Perhaps I should have posted this tomorrow when it would be clear I'm not making a joke. I repeat: no joking.

Posted by: Roberr at April 1, 2010 9:08 PM

I'm t0tes mad @ kballs. I n3v3r get to be thirty-ninth!!!!

Posted by: roslyn at April 1, 2010 11:12 PM

Now can we put up the real review for this flick???

Posted by: bignick at April 2, 2010 2:47 AM

Was gonna see this just for Mads Mikkelsen, but sounds like its actually gonna be good

Posted by: silchas ruin at April 2, 2010 9:42 AM

It really doesn't deserve a proper review.

Posted by: TheChief at April 2, 2010 12:42 PM