Yet Another Open Letter to Taylor Swift, aka, DAMMIT, TAYLOR, DO WE HAVE TO KEEP DOING THIS?
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Yet Another Open Letter to Taylor Swift, aka, DAMMIT, TAYLOR, DO WE HAVE TO KEEP DOING THIS?

By Courtney Enlow | Celebrities Are Better than You | March 5, 2013 | Comments ()

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First, she came for our John Mayer, and I did nothing, because "Room for Squares" was, like, a really long time ago.

Then, she came for Jake Gyllenhaal, and I did nothing, because I didn't really care.

Then she came for Amy and Tina.


I swear to God, sparkles. I will strike you down. So help me.

So, Swifty Lazar, in your new Vanity Fair interview, you acted pretty hunty. Which was actually refreshing, except you were whiny. Which is fine, I don't think famous people should be above whining. But the things you chose to whine about? Dear Christ, child.

And there's a lot of "dear Christ, child" moments in this interview. I will be bolding my favorites.

"[T]he fact that there are slide shows of a dozen guys that I either hugged on a red carpet or met for lunch or wrote a song with. . . it's just kind of ridiculous." As she sits drinking lavender lemonade in her "Tim Burton-Alice in Wonderland-pirate ship-Peter Pan" apartment, Swift continues, "It's why I have to avoid the tabloid part of our culture, because they turn you into a fictional character." When Sales asks Swift if she's boy-crazy, Swift smiles. "For a female to write about her feelings, and then be portrayed as some clingy, insane, desperate girlfriend in need of making you marry her and have kids with her, I think that's taking something that potentially should be celebrated--a woman writing about her feelings in a confessional way--that's taking it and turning it and twisting it into something that is frankly a little sexist."

Okay, that was only the second paragraph of the interview, and I'm already done with you. A) Of course you were drinking lavender lemonade (which sounds delicious, actually, and I'm a tad parched if you want to pass some this way) in your ridiculous lady-child apartment. Because of course you were, leading to B) YOU HAVE TURNED YOURSELF INTO A FICTIONAL CHARACTER, YOU TWEE TWIT OF A TEACUP DOILY. You have fabricated an entire existence based on Anthropologie showrooms and woe-is-me heartbreak songs. That is not a vicious act of a cruel, unforgiving, misogynist media. That is what you, YOU, have delivered to us on a silver fucking platter, adorned with Lisa Frank dolphins. These are not out-of-context, misquoted references--these are songs you, YOU, wrote, with heart-dotted 'i's and daisies in each corner. That is the persona you have generated, profited off of and served out to tween and teen girls like maple-soaked candy violets in the world's most adorable lunch line.

You do not get to act somehow hurt by your own message. Release a single about not needing a man, or going out with friends or literally anything other than about someone not loving you, and then we'll talk.

Now, let's talk sexism, and let's start with the Tiffany-blue straw that broke the vintage sock monkey camels' back:

"You know, Katie Couric is one of my favorite people," Taylor Swift tells Vanity Fair contributing editor Nancy Jo Sales on the subject of mean girls in general and in response to an incident at this year's Golden Globes, where Amy Poehler and Tina Fey mocked her highly scrutinized love life. "Because she said to me she had heard a quote that she loved, that said, 'There's a special place in hell for women who don't help other women.'"

First and foremost, you just came for two of the most universally beloved, highly respected women in the entertainment industry and beyond, women who ignite passion and hope in young girls, inspiring them to be more than just sweet and pretty, letting them yearn for more than just the insipid notion of longing for boys to love and fulfill them. And you came for them with that garbage?

Fucking Taylor, god damn.

There is a legitimate issue of misogyny in entertainment, gossip culture and female society, perpetrated by our very own kind. This is true--anyone who went to high school knows it. But the idea that women need to stand by and support every single woman who comes along, based not on shared opinions or interests, but solely upon a shared genitalia, is ridiculous. People pulled that shit with Sarah Palin and Michelle Bachmann--I'm not doing this with you Taylor.

Yes, people pick on you because you are a woman who dates and hooks up a lot. I'm not gonna fault you for that. Get it, girl. And that aspect of criticism against you is not fair--however, again, you invite it. You bring it on yourself, painting yourself as this innocent virgin, "the girl in the dress" who "cried the whole way home," lambasting these hypothetical other girls in your songs because you're not like them, you're better than them, and, yet, somehow these boys just don't like you like they like them.

The issue is not that you are a woman. It is not that you are a slut. Far from it. The issue is that you are a hypocrite. A smug, nose-in-the-air hypocrite who puts on this front that you're just one of the girls, just like your young, YOUNG, IMPRESSIONABLE, fans. But you're not. The facade is cracking. You imply that there's a special place in hell for two women who have done more for womankind than your Moleskin dream journal could ever imagine just because they made a totally innocent joke about you. You thank your fans for having your back when that mean, horrid beloved icon responded to their joke by saying he didn't want his son as a subject of one of your songs, when apparently "having your back" meant making unfathomable Parkinson's jokes until he called you and apologized to call off the troops.

Taylor, you need to take a good look at your image--the one YOU have perpetuated. If you don't like the way the media is portraying you, fix it. Stop bearding every young performer with a gay rumor on his Tumblr dash. Stop writing poor-me songs and grow the fuck up, because, seriously, boys just cannot matter that much. And, if you do like it, if you like who you are, the songs you write and the image you've meticulously crafted, then who fucking cares if people don't like it?

Hmm. That sounds familiar. I wonder who once said something to that effect...


And while we're rolling along on the Amy Poehler quote machine, Taylor, I invite you to grow a pair. And if not, Tina and Amy can lend you theirs.

5 Shows After Dark 3/5/13 | Flight Behavior by Barbara Kingsolver

Comments Are Welcome, Bigots and Trolls Are Not

  • anneberry

    ‘There’s a special place in hell for women who don’t help other women." Madeleine Albright said this by the way, I love how Taylor doesn't even know who the fuck she is quoting, just who she heard the quote from. And yeah, Albright is a crazy strong lady, but I don't agree at all with that quote, it sounds good, but pull it apart and it a patronizing, regressive look at feminism.

    Swift sure is quick to criticize women that dont hold to these prescribed high standards, and yet is unfathomably unaware of how much she falls short herself. Yeah, remember when you wrote an entire fucking son about how the new girl your ex-boyfriend is dating is a slut. HELLO??!! So, which circle of hell do you prefer Taylor? I am not at all surprised that she says shit like this though. Self-awareness comes with maturity, and this girl lives in a perpetual childhood. And she aint got many years left where she can get away with it.

  • theresa443509

    Though I'll probably get a lot of negative votes for noting this (or perhaps none at all, since this topic is clearly already yesterday's news), it seems that the amount of anger and venom in this article is just a tad bit out of proportion to what Swift has actually done.

    Thus far, she has:

    1. Dated a lot of boys

    2. Wrote songs about some of her break ups

    3. Been a "girly girl" who enjoys pink, pretty things, and the like (the writer, in typical style, freaks out about this by calling her "sparkles.")

    4. Has complained that the media is treating her unfairly.

    5. Seems to lack self awareness.

    Personally, I'd only blame her for the last of these things.

    First, Taylor Swift should be able to date as many boys as she darn well pleases. I have no idea why so many people seem to continue getting mad about his issue. Many people I've talked to thus far have claimed that they hate the fact that Taylor's dated around because "she pretends to be a good girl but she isn't." Clearly, the virginal Taylor that American fell in love with back in 2008 proved to be not a flawless girl, but a normal woman with somewhat strong romantic appetites.

    In typical fashion, the author of this piece insists that she has no issue with Taylors romantic choices, then proceeds to degrade Taylor for her sexual behavior. ("It is not that you are a slut." And later: "Stop bearding every young performer with a gay rumor on his Tumblr dash.")

    Secondly, while some of Swift's break up songs seem self indulgent and whiny, aren't those of nearly every other singer who writes his or her own music? Adele for one. John Mayor for another. (Who shares both Taylor's dating record and her habit of insulting exes in songs and in the media, but whom the author seems to love-- "our John Mayor," she calls him. Guess it DOES have something to do with Taylor being a woman, though the author clearly lacks the self awareness and depth to realize this, or the ability to examine her own prejudices and those of our society.)

    Songs written about love and relationships by pop stars and muscians are by their nature self indulgent, hypocritical, laughly one sided. Personally, I've never thought Taylor has claimed to tell the whole story. I've always assumed that her songs were intended to be intensely subjective excersizes-- meant to resemble one's internal monologue after recently breaking up.

    As for Taylor's comments that the media would persecute her far less for her love life and songs if she were a male, I think that's entirely true. Cases like Charley Sheen, Russell Brand, and (until recently) John Mayor prove that. Such men may have been criticized, but their worth was never degraded. Never were they given the intense, visceral venom that Taylor is subjected to here and elsewhere.

    Taylor's complaints about Tina and Amy were indeed out of line. While she had a point that the media was treating her unfairly, Amy and Tina's jokes should have been taken as what they clearly were-- jokes. Furthermore, Amy and Tina's cracks were light teasing; rather than gender specific vitriol. I see plenty of the latter in this very article,, despite the authors hysterical, self righteous claims of being not at all sexist. (Hey Enlow-- Loathing female figures like Sarah Palin, Michelle Bauchman, and Taylor Swift is all well and good. It is when you get into the terrain of degrading, hypocrically applied (John Mayer is okay with you, but Taylor's a monster who needs to be hectored and endlessly), female specific insults, yeah, you are being sexist.

    In the end, what Swift seems to lack is self awareness. Both in her own reactions to the media, and in the relationships she's portrayed in her art. However, in the end, the writer of this piece and those responding to it here display far, far less self awareness than Swift ever has. Sad, since Enlow and those like her basically speak for 99.9 percent of the general, average minded population.

  • ceejeemcbeegee

    She's such a fucking hypocrite. All she does is tear other women down in her songs. Oh wait, those women wear short skirts and are cheer captains. I forgot that feminism is only for girls who wear sneakers and t-shirts while the sit in the bleachers.

  • Ben

    Saw some quotes about this posted on the net and my first reaction "Oh shit Pajiba's gonna have a great article" and you did and it was awesome. Thank you.

  • Sam Iam
  • TheKoiPolloi

    "There's a special place in hell for women who don't help other women" ... says the woman who declines to be called a feminist.

  • Sofia


  • Sam Iam

    Oh and how dare her talk about sexism, she's the same one that slur shamed Camilla Belle. Maybe all these girls get the boys she wants because they know how to take a joke, be them self and don't play the victim all the time. Until she grows up she will never have a man, and sadly for her, her fans are growing up but she's still stuck at 17z

  • Sam Iam

    I know I haven't met you but I think I love you.

  • kayla

    So Taylor is pretending to be too cute to be dating so many dudes and she should grow a pair because she is the reason she's getting criticised. Because she's cute and cute girls can't be slutty. Whatever. She can fuck whoever she wants and write about whatever she wants. She's grown. Her music is terrible, and I guarantee that stopping being "cute" is not gonna fix it.

  • Kballs

    During an interview she did for 60 Minutes awhile back, they kept showing her onstage gaping at the screaming crowd like a three year old surrounded by cake and ice cream with a "gee golly, is this all for ME????" expression. The interviewer asked if it was a put-on or if she was really that shocked at the fans' response every time she performed. She insisted it was the latter to the hilariously obvious disbelief of the interviewer. He gave her the same do-I-look-like-a-fucking-idiot look I give my 5 year old when she tells me the dog drew all over the wall.

    I bring this up to assure you that Taylor Swift thinks we are all morons and will continue to bullshit her way into stunted adulthood. Her insecurities should have their own chapter in the DSM-5.

  • Ozioma

    Never have I been so happy that I have not heard a single one of this woman's songs in my life. Because she is a woman: she is twenty-three goddamned years old and needs to stop acting like someone shat in her favourite sparkly-desu unicorn teacup when someone makes a light joke about her.

  • duckandcover

    I don't trust any girl that constantly looks like she just smelled shit.

    Also, she pushed me to the point of no return when she used the Grammys to diss her ex, Harry Styles:

  • F'mal DeHyde

    Oh man, she DOES look like she's always smelling shit. hahaha!

  • AS613

    Well it's a good thing Swift is 1 trillion times hotter than Adele

  • hatecreatingusernames

    How is that a good thing? People are so annoyed by Taylor's shtick that they don't give a shit about her looks. Besides, that's debatable. I think Adele looks better than Taylor, but that's not what's important here. Adele will always be remembered for being talented and being a likable person. Taylor will be remembered for writing whiny emotional songs about all of her short lived relationships and not being able to take a joke about herself because in her world, everyone needs to kiss her ass.

  • ,

    Courtney, Your rage ... it is my milk, my honey, my manna from heaven. I feed on it, feast upon it, suckle it; it is my nourishment, my whiskey, my food. It renews my soul. It is the very essence of life, it is ... my very fucking LIFE.

    If anything ever happens to you, if you die or leave Pajiba, I will kill myself. I MEAN IT. I am stream-of-conscienceing right now, drunk on excellet beer and Jack Daniels, drunk on your power, your anger, your rage, it sustains me (but not drunk enough to not go back and correct my spelling errors, apparently, God-DAMN, this is what a life as a copy editor has wrought, I cannot just let the mistakes go and admire your awesomeness, your godlike power of wordsmithery, without taking that goddam extra i out of without and that what was it an r? out of taking and now I seem able to type wiothout error ooops fuck without ewrror oops fuck error.

    I lovbe you fuck corections marry me and have more children.

  • googergieger

    Hmm, help me out here. Taylor Swift is the white one right?

  • Tom James

    Tina Fey and Amy Poehler are overrated. "Two of the most universally beloved, highly respected women in the
    entertainment industry and beyond, women who ignite passion and hope in
    young girls"??


  • chanohack

    I think you are wrong. If anything, this is the first year they've been close to correctly-rated. And I can vouch for them igniting passion and hope and earning respect.

  • John W


  • Scratch McGee

    I love the rage here. Rage is always fun. But I just can't seem to raise my own ire to the acceptable level. Maybe it's because my reaction to the Taylor quote was more "oh, flagrant display of uptight doltishness, well done" and "sheesh, girl, don't ya know to pick on someone your own (intellectual) size??" than bloodthirsty howl. Or maybe it's because I don't revere Amy and Tina beyond " likeable and talented". Or maybe it's just because it's somewhat exhausting and whiplash-enducing to be courted with WE HATE THIS ONE! DESPISE! LOATHE!! BUT LOVE THIS ONE!! ADORE! WORSHIP!! CAN DO NO WRONG!!- and so I just can't muster up a shit to give.

    Yes, Taylor came off like a dumbass who can't take a joke. Yes, she's a halfwit for quoting Katie Couric quoting someone else- if you don't know the original source, learn it or don't use it, fool. And yes, the girl has songs about subjects other than boys (Ronan, Best Day are a couple) and does have a song about going out with friends (22)...and no, they're not exactly profound. But in the who the fuck cares if people don't like it question posed at the end, I would think the sales machine that is Taylor Swift would have somewhat of a vested interest. Same as if Amy Poehler had found that the intended audience had, for whatever reason, not liked what she did, she might have to fucking care about it. I do understand the overall statement made in that Poehler story, but I also think if you want to sell, you have to give some slight fucking care, at some point. And Taylor Swift clearly likes to build her little sparkly world with care, down to the teapot cozies.

  • kirbyjay

    Amy Poehler didn't fucking care if Jimmy Fallon liked it, not the audience. It was probably the defining moment that put an end to the SNL boys club and decided that women are funny and they don't have to acquiesce to the men.

  • theresa443509

    Amy Poehler "didn't fucking care" if Jimmy Fallon, one guy, liked it. Amy Poehler only had to deal with the criticism (and dislike) of one man. Swift has to deal with the vitriolic hatred and dislike of millions of people. Much of it as vitriolic, inconsistant, and hypocritical as the author of this piece's dislike.

    The author of this piece first castigates Taylor for apparently being "snobbish", cold, and unconcerned with what others think of her. (Dubbing Taylor " A smug, nose-in-the-air hypocrite who puts on this front that you’re just one of the girls, just like your young, YOUNG, IMPRESSIONABLE, fans,"), then berates her for caring when the media viciously berates her... implying that Taylor, the "smug, nose in the air hypocrite", is simultaneously a snob who couldn't care less and an individual who cares far too much. And I just don't get it. What is she supposed to be? A middle aged, endlessly self deprecating, non threateningly pretty, funny, nice to everyone, "relatable", but ultimately not at all wave making female like Amy and the cautious, overrated Tina Fey?

    Should she truly be so hated for not being the kind of female that "average females" (often self proclaimed feminists who nevertheless spend their time ripping down females for gender specific, sexist reasons) that the author relates to? For being somewhat oversensitive--and mildly insulting two females whom the author relates to? (Because the author spends an article ripping apart Taylor for everything from her appearance to her personality to her clothing choices to her decorating skills.) Should she be hated for being a sort of female the author is threatened by and clearly envies-- the gorgeous, popular girl in high school who is clearly getting her cake and eating it too? Who is simultaneously a "good girl" but also enjoys dating a lot of different boys?

    Who knows. But the author of this piece could use a bit of that self awareness she rants on about so much. Perhaps to consider the exact reasons why she so loathes Taylor Swift, a celebrity who has done nothing harmful to her, or anyone else.

    Furthermore, the author's assumptions that, in the face of vicious media criticism like this from countless people, Taylor should "just stop caring" is insensitive and idiotic in the extreme. How could anyone fail to be touched by such vicious, hateful criticism coming at the from all sides?

  • Arielle


  • Gigi Agius

    Amy Poehler commented (through THR) and it's just as lovely, charming and funny as you'd expect. http://www.hollywoodreporter.c...

  • Quatermain

    "I swear to God, sparkles. I will strike you down. So help me." You can't win, Courtney. If you strike her down, she will become more powerful than you can possibly imagine. Is that what you want?

  • QueeferSutherland

    People don't pick on her because she dates a lot. That's perfectly normal, cool, and something we'd respect if she just embraced it. They shit on her because she's yet another whiny, one trick pony who became rich and famous for writing insipid, grade school mixtape songs. YOURE MEAN! WE'RE LIKE NEVER GETTING BACK TOGETHER! She's Tim Tebow and Kim Kardashian and Herman Cain - someone whose fame is in no way proportional to their skill set. Her lack of authenticity is just icing on the cake. I bet her dildo is a rolled up James Frey memoir, and she fakes the orgasm every single time.

    Now THAT'S sexist!

    Edit: all that said, the idea that she "attacked" anyone is ridiculous. Mountain out of a molehill.

  • ceejeemcbeegee

    I love that you compared her to Tebow. Marry me.

  • Kballs

    I think people are saying her fans attacked someone and that she was at fault for supporting their actions. While I'm not above a well-placed death threat, I don't think Mr. J Fox deserved to have his soul flogged for hoping his son didn't date an immature, gossipy fart of a human being.

  • Alwyn

    did dan harmon write this

  • mediamaven77

    I've worked in the entertainment industry for years and it's well-known by everyone behind the camera that Taylor Swift is gay. This is why she dates other closeted male celebrities -- and this is why she seems to always be writing songs about wanting people she can't have. With the strain of fame and a big big secret that makes it impossible for her to have a healthy, stable, out relationship I can see why the same story gets constantly rewritten again and again in her lyrics. I actually just feel sorry for her. Can we really expect her to command the machine that has created her? An army of agents, managers, publicists, lawyers, record executives and media conglomerates? So she drinks lavender lemonade in an Alice and Wonderland-like apartment -- of course she does, she's just a child playing tea party -- is that a reason to hate her? I was a moron at her age. I can't imagine what I would have been saying then about women in a completely different demographic then me. I would like to think I'd be eloquent and mature, but I doubt it.

  • hatecreatingusernames

    But what about John Mayer and Conor Kennedy? I've heard gay rumors about her other boyfriends, but it's pretty obvious that those two guys are not gay. Also, she's had boyfriends prior to her being famous, so how can she be 100% gay? Ridiculous.

  • F'mal DeHyde

    That's some good rumor-mongering. You not only suggest that Swift is gay, but every man she's been involved with is as well. Someone should let Katy Perry know.

  • LibraryChick

    I'm not in the entertainment industry, but there are ways to be closeted (or just keep a relationship relatively private) without going out of one's way to lie. On 60 Minutes she presented herself as someone in pretty solid control of her career and image. If she has chosen not to be out because she thinks the country music world or the South might turn against her, that's sad. She probably has no idea how many more fans she would gain just for being honest.

  • Genevieve Burgess

    I did some dumb things at 23 also. And people had the right to judge me on what I did, what I said, and who I chose to spend time with. I was an adult, I was making those choices and other people had every right to assume that those decisions indicated something about myself that they could take into account when making judgements about me. Taylor Swift does not get to be mad at us for listening to what she says, watching what she does, and then proceeding to use that information to make decisions about how we feel about her or (god forbid) making a throw-away joke about her. If what you're saying about her is true then that's sad, but it doesn't change the version of herself she's been selling up until now and how we might feel about that version of her.

  • Tinkerville

    Very well said.

  • Lyn

    I'm ten years older than her and when I was her age I made bad dating decisions, bad clothing decisions, bad decorating decisions, all around bad life decisions - but when I was her age Tina Fey and Amy Poehler were both on SNL and I would NEVER have said a word against them! And if they took a moment in a public forum to offer me some humorous advice I would have temporarily withdrawn from society to reflect on how I could join their cause of bringing more awesome to the world. Taylor sucks.

  • lameaim

    Man, Kanye got a Kardashian preggers and is STILL winning the war.

    Let's get Weekly World News on the case!

  • Kip Hackman

    I'm done expecting most celebrities to act like actual human beings. It boggles the mind that someone could actually behave this way, but then again, she has a tiny nation that "has her back". I'm normally not a fan of censorship but if I could I would censor every aspect of her life out of reach of my internet. If I never had to hear about her life again I'd be pretty stoked.

  • Jessica

    Does she mean the same Katie Couric that tore into Sarah Palin? Want to know why people applauded Katie instead of tearing into her for attacking another female? Maybe because presenting an idea, opinion, a joke, or a fact as something different than the other female you are arguing with is not an attack on feminism but just something that happens between two individuals? Yeah, maybe a joke is just a joke and Taylor Swift should calm the fuck down and quit acting like a perpetual 15 year old girl.

  • F'mal DeHyde

    She tore into Palin? I must have missed that.

  • foolsage

    Well, really it was Terry Tate who did that. Katie just set it up.

  • F'mal DeHyde

    hahaha! That actually scared me.

  • John G.

    taylor "swiftboat" swift can shut the hell up

  • TheAggroCraig

    You said it all with "Fucking Taylor, god damn."

  • Aww Chea

    what does acting "pretty hunty" mean? Does it mean she's hunting for attention? If so, yeah, pretty hunty.

  • L.O.V.E.

    "But the idea that women need to stand by and support every single woman
    who comes along, based ... solely upon a shared genitalia, is ridiculous."

    No wonder Tina and Amy made fun of her. I wouldn't like it either if I had to share genitalia with someone who slept with John Mayer.

    But how does this even work? Do they each get to use the vagina every third day? Can they swap days? Does each get assigned every third month for period-duty?

    So many questions.

  • L.O.V.E.

    And is my wife part of this time-share? Does this explain why she is unavailable for sex sometimes due to "women issues"? Is that just code for "Tina's got the vag this weekend"?

    I think I am finally starting to understand the Vagina Monologues.

  • I will note the following:

    A: Who quotes Katie Couric?

    B: Wasn't Katie Couric the one who excoriated Sarah Palin, who I think is another woman?

    C: The quote "There is a special place in hell for women who don't help other women" is not by Katie Couric. It's from Madeline Albright, a woman who did stuff. And things.

  • thatstrangewoman

    But until you stop acting like a child, lil miss, you don't get to use a quote referring to women treating women in a particular way.

  • Bert_McGurt

    And whose portrait resides on the wall of one Leslie Knope. Check-MATE, Swifty!

  • MrsAtaxxia

    Amy responded! And it was of course, amazing.

  • LibraryChick

    Thanks for sharing! I really don't think Tina Fey and Amy Poehler would have made the joke if they thought she couldn't take it.

  • $30545981

    What a sad mess of a post. God save me from all the uninformed shit I said when I was in my early 20s, and I didn't have the media beast to contend with. I love nothing more than an article that berates a woman for not promoting feminist ideals and then blames the victim with statements such as "you brought this on yourself."

  • F'mal DeHyde

    I might not have a firm grasp on this but it looked like Tina Fey made a joke about Swift staying away from Michael J Fox's son. That's it. Then apparently poor abused little Taylor basically condemned Fey and Pohler to hell for not "supporting" her.

    So how is Swift a victim in all this? You don't hear Glenn Close whining about their joke about her being drunk, do you?

  • ghisent

    I'm sorry, but what... what exactly is Taylor Swift the victim of? Someone -- two strong, educated, feminist role models -- made a joke about her music? Do I have that right? That somehow gets her into the pantheon of righteous victims?

    No one's blaming her for anything. She literally brought this on herself with her own actions, and it's her refusal to take responsibility for them, and instead blame everyone around her, that's the issue at hand.

  • kirbyjay

    Her little twit fans were mean to Michael J Fox, beloved tv star? That whore! Didn't like her then, like her less now, and I guess if Kanye is going to be an asshole, in other words, himself, it might as well be to her.

    On an Amy Poehler note, I grew up and still live in the town directly north of Amy Poehler's Burlington, MA and the Burlington Mall is my mall. ( 7 1/2 minutes away) I've been breathing rarified Amy Poehler air for years. Somehow, I feel superior today!!! Rachel Dratch and Mindy Kaling both come from Lexington, MA, of the historical Lexington and Concord " the British are coming" minutemen vs. redcoats Lexington which is two towns away, which reminds me, why doesn't Rachel Dratch have a bigger career?

  • Nadine

    Fuck Taylor Swift, I can't even with this stupid little brat.

  • Red Rage

    Not that religious but damn if that doesn't deserve an AMEN

  • TheEmpress

    *slow clap*

  • Dumily

    Who could have guessed it would turn out the most offensive part of Kayne's speech was actually when he said, "Ima let you finish"? Dude's just ahead of his time.

  • Natallica

    Do you mean that, in 10 years, having babies with talentless reality stars who love to wear clothes designed in the ninth circle of Hell is going to be a trend? God have mercy on us!

  • kushiro -

    Taylor Swift is just metaphorically holding up a massive sign that says "STOP READING THIS SIGN!!"

  • chanohack

    This made me snort.

  • The Kilted Yaksman

    What the fuck is it with all these douchebags lining up to be her next song inspiration? Has star fucker become a national pastime amongst the wealthy do-nothings?

  • Quatermain

    I'd throw her a bone. Of course, I'd also give her a fake name and be gone when she woke up the next morning. I'm not an idiot, you know.

  • Lindsey Gregory

    Where is my church hanky?? Cause you done preached it:

  • e jerry powell

    Clutch the pearls, girl.

  • BobbFrapples

    I've said it once, I'll say it again: This kind of craziness is going tot lead to Swifty running for office someday. She's got the money and the delusion to do it.

  • Guest

    I just wish she'd stop pretending to be a virgin.


  • Lynl

    Really? We're doing this?

  • Drake

    Well, if you spend all your time bearding, hanging onto one's virginity is quite easy.

  • mswas

    Um.... yes you can, and twice on Sunday.

  • InternetMagpie

    She does?

  • Nieve 'The Threadkiller Queen'

    Perfection. You just said everything I wanted to say beautifully.
    Taylor swift moaning about lack of female support in a male industry business when she called another young actress a slut in one of her songs. Hypocrisy thy face is Taylor Swift

  • Nieve 'The Threadkiller Queen'

    This really should have said Male Dominated Industry but my righteous fury got the better of me.

  • dizzylucy

    Trying to decide which I despise more - her condemning two awesome women to hell for making ONE JOKE about her at an awards show (during which they joked about many, many other people too) or her acknowledging her lunatic fans attacking Michael J Fox as "having her back".
    She lives in a bubble, a glitter and unicorn filled bubble of delusion, completely void of perspective and any sense of humor about herself.

  • babykangarootribbiani

    watching taylor swift is kind like of watching michelle tanner on full house. everyone thinks she;s just so goshdarn adorable that they look the other way whenever taylor throws a tantrum because she didn;t get her way. but it's getting harder and harder to do that, because while she says she doesn;t chase boys and she doesn;t do this or that she is also the one who turns all her fans against whoever had the gall to want her out of his life (although who has a brain lesion big enough they still want to date taylor swift?) the only people who haven;t seen through her shit by now are girls under the age of 13, which sadly, is a force that flocks to social media to tear down those brunettes who done taylor wrong. i hope people forget about taylor and focus on the d.j. tanner's (jennifer lawrence) and stephanie tanners (idk... dakota fanning? the girl who plays sally draper?) of hollywood.

  • LibraryChick

    I actually think of Swift as more like Stephanie Tanner. Stephanie was always saying "How rude!" but then would turn around and trash her sister D.J. about her weight.

    Musically speaking, I would say Taylor Swift is closer to Jessica Simpson in terms of relevance. Just as I can hardly remember a Jessica Simpson song today, I will be surprised if I remember any particular Taylor Swift songs 10-15 years from now. Taylor Swift probably has more control over her career than Jessica Simpson did at the same age, but Jessica Simpson didn't build a career on trashing anyone (which upon further reflection is amazing considering her past history in reality TV). If Tina Fey and Amy Poehler made a joke about Ms. Simpson, I imagine her laughing right along with them. If Ms. Swift expects to have a career after her music is no longer relevant, she might want to consider being more like Jessica Simpson. (Yes, I say this knowing Ms. Simpson isn't much a role model herself, but to my knowledge she pays her bills and stays out of legal trouble, which is more than can be said for some of her contemporaries.)

  • e jerry powell

    Which is interesting, given how close-to-the-vest Ashley and Mary-Kate have been playing it of late...

  • I just want to shake her and scream "YOU ARE TOO OLD FOR THIS SHIT" into her face a lot.

  • Candee


    I try to explain why I hate her so much, and they just look at me like I'm crazy. She is in her twenties and still writing songs like a 12 year old brat. STOP. I'd actually like her if she actually acted like a god damn adult.

    But she doesn't.

  • ,

    She's going to be 30 someday. That's going to be fun.

  • e jerry powell

    Don't you threaten me with that; I will come find you and make you take it back.

  • Natallica

    I think she's just creepy. The combination of Stepford Wives attitude and cold, calculated bitchiness makes me think one day she will kill somebody and stage it as a suicide. Watch out, boyfriend number X

  • Quorren

    Can we get Taylor Swift as the lead in Gone Girl?

  • Bodhi

    Holy shit you are right. Or the psychotic step sister in Flynn's Sharp Objects

  • As soon as I read that, it clicked just how perfect that would be. I'm bordering on speechless.

  • prince_of_montagu

    Amazing Amy = Terrific Taylor.

  • FrayedMachine

    Ahhhh... I loveth thou so much-eth.

  • Bert_McGurt

    Somewhere Patsy Cline is thinking "I paved the way for THIS whiny little sh*t?"

  • e jerry powell

    So much THIS.

    You'd think Patsy would find some way to possess Loretta Lynn just long enough to bitch-slap Taylor Swift into a cute little coma.

  • chanohack

    God, she's awful. She is the very picture of self-delusion.

  • chanohack

    Like what does she think, that it's about time someone stood up to Fey/Poehler and their anti-feminism woman-hating ways? Way to be, Taylor. The more I think about this, the angrier I get.

  • Jezzer

    I am saddened by all the women taking swipes at this poor, impressionable young girl who just wants to be loved. :(((

  • e jerry powell

    Young girl? I thought she was a spotted hyena.

  • puffin

    She's not a "young girl," she is a 23 year old woman. Not that she acts like it.

  • Pinky McLadybits

    SHUP, JEZZER! GAWL. Let me have my clearly misogynistic views of her!

  • Genevieve Burgess

    I'd have so much more respect for her if she just owned up to her bitchiness. Like, this wouldn't even be surprising or noteworthy because you could just be like "Well, it's Taylor Swift, that chick's pretty bitchy and she's not shy about it." But she INSISTS on playing this innocent little victim like she hasn't emotionally moved past Kanye storming the stage when she won that VMA (which, in retrospect, was hilarious) and everyone is out to get her and crush her dreams.

    Bitch you ACHIEVED your dreams. All of them. Every last one. Maybe let people joke a bit about you gracefully and you'll earn enough cultural capital to keep making absurd amounts of money for excerpts from the diary you wrote when you were 14. Or just resolve to be an out and out bitch. Either way.

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