Shia LaBeouf Apologizes for Existing, Is Hosting An Art Show So People Can Torture Him. Or Something.

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Shia LaBeouf Apologizes for Existing, Is Holding An Art Show So People Can Torture Him. Or Something.

By Rebecca Pahle | Celebrities Are Better than You | February 11, 2014 | Comments ()

shia i am sorry.jpg

The Beef rollercoaster just keeps on climbing. He plagiarized about Daniel Clowes, then skywrote about it, then claimed not to be a celebrity and wore a paper bag on his head to the Nymphomaniac, Part I premiere. And now he’s apologizing for all that, like we denizens of the Internet aren’t eagerly eating up his whacktastictude with a spoon, waiting with baited breath for the next time he’ll do something crazyfunny for us to go on about for a day or two. If he were genuinely sorry, he’d stop providing for us. Oh my god, I think I’ve cracked the code.

This time he’s collaborating with “meta-modernist pioneer” Luke Turner and performance artist Nastja Säde Rönkkö for #IAMSORRY, an experimental art exhibit in Los Angeles that invites its attendees to prod at LaBeouf with sticks. No really, that’s what it sounds like. Via the press release (emphasis mine):

Shia LaBeouf is sorry. Sincerely sorry.

He will be in situ at 7354 Beverly Boulevard for the duration.

Implements will be provided.

Free admission.

Well, that sounds… fun? I guess? Tell me the “implements” include a DVD player and a copy of Transformers: Dark of the Moon. This takes place on February 11-16th from 11am-6pm PST, meaning *quick calculation for time zones* it started an hour ago. Los Angelenos, get to Beverly Boulevard and tell us what the hell’s going on, eh?

(Time Entertainment)

Rebecca isn’t actually that violent a person *eyedart*.

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Comments Are Welcome, Bigots and Trolls Are Not

  • I am so glad I'm nowhere near this, because I would feel compelled to go in and talk to him like I would one of my own kids who has suddenly forgotten his morals and manners. His failure to react would be familiar and almost comforting, but at least he would have been told, gently yet firmly, that it is unacceptable to steal and even more unacceptable to throw a tantrum after being caught stealing. Then I could address his facial hair situation.

  • HelloLongBeach

    I will be so disappointed if, come Sunday, there is no mime dressed with angel wings opening the door to show *gasp* Shia is no longer in the room. Just a paper bag stained with tears that have dried into the likeness of Optimus Prime.

  • linnyloo

    Ugh. His whole "I've been caught plagiarizing, so now I'm going to make a Meta Statement about Celebrity Apologies and Originality and Art by plagiarizing a lot of apologies" schtick is really so monumentally douchetastic that it's crawled up its own ass and is suffocating in noxious fumes of pretension.

  • GrungellaCronk

    Oh Shia...

    ...then eat it

  • googergieger

    So when are you guys going to decide to stop talking about the guy?

  • CyT

    Umm... has anyone asked Casey Affleck for a response on all this yet?

  • Yocean

    Maybe I go in the room with the plagiarized graphic novel and just read it in font of him, never interacting, until they kick me out?

  • Yocean

    Maybe I go in there with the graphic novel he plagiarized and just read it in font of him, never interacting, until they kick me out?

  • bastich

    Maybe you could do it while wearing a paper bag on your head with

  • Yocean

    NICE!! I am taking more suggestions now :D

  • Yocean

    Wait, I know where the BuzzFeed office is. It's like six blocks from where I live...this is becoming more inevitable :P

  • Yocean

    Hmm. I do live near Beverly Hills but I just don't know if I want to give the douche any attention... But if you want me to take one for the team, I will.

  • Babs

    Buzzfeed has a blow by blow of this. Apparently the gallery is directly across from the their LA office. I feel dirty that I'm even participating in giving him more of the limelight. I think one of the implements should be old Even Stevens episodes running in a loop or pictures from Amnesty International of truly tortured souls.

  • e jerry powell

    The truest apology that Beefy can give is to move into a cave in the mountains of Tibet AND NEVER COME BACK.

    Except for the fact that he's giving Chris Hardwick hella material for @midnight.

  • BlackRabbit

    Is this like when you can beat up a car for charity? I smashed the crap out of that thing.

  • Rebecca Pahle

    I read "car" as "cat" and was absolutely HORRIFIED for a second.

  • AngelenoEwok

    My dreams are finally coming true, BUT AT WHAT COST.

  • Mrs. Julien

    I find this comment hysterically funny.

  • My response to this whole story:

  • acropunk

    You care enough to take the time to find and post a gif.

  • danielle

    that was a jpg

  • Mrs. Julien

    Just because you consider yourself an artist does not mean you are a good artist, c.f. James Franco.

  • Ingrid Today

    At least James Franco has a sense of humor about himself.

  • kayemcee

    Isn't it time for him to be hospitalized for exhaustion?

  • firedmyass

    Can you be hospitalized for inspiring exhaustion?

  • At least he put a hashtag on it.

  • BendinIntheWind


  • Fabius_Maximus

    You haven't seen the new one yet.

  • BendinIntheWind

    Fair point, but with Mark Wahlberg in the driver's seat, I can maybe bank on some good (unintentional) comedy.

  • Ingrid Today


  • BendinIntheWind

    Indeed I have - that was a big steaming pile of garbage as well, but since Rebecca went after "Dark of the Moon", I felt it was my duty to come out swinging for "Revenge of the Fallen". Because COME ON, ancient Transformer Egyptian pharaohs? Robot testicles? Racist caricature autobots? EASILY THE WORST. The third one is by no means a *good* movie, but it is approximately one million billion times better than the second.

  • lowercase_ryan

    Kanye-ing anything is never not funny.

  • vivkane

    Nothing says sincere apology like an all caps hashtag.

  • lowercase_ryan

    Sample of the original works available:

  • Can I just hope that the "implements" that are provided include a cattle prod, a tuning fork, and a bucket of spaghetti marinara?

  • Karen John

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    ★★★ ★★★ ★�★★ ★★★★ �★★★ ★★★The truest apology that Beefy can give is to move into a cave in the mountains of Tibet AND NEVER COME BACK.

  • e jerry powell

    I'm hoping for a pledge paddle, myself.

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