Jennifer Aniston Sure is Pregnant a Lot
film / tv / lists / guides / news / love / celeb / video / think pieces / staff / podcasts / web culture / politics / dc / snl / netflix / marvel / cbr

Jennifer Aniston Sure is Pregnant a Lot

By Courtney Enlow | Celebrities Are Better than You | September 18, 2013 | Comments ()


Have you heard? Jennifer Aniston’s pregnant! Huzzah!

Wait…I feel like I might have heard that before…

















Then there was that time she was adopting…


And then there was that time she magically became someone else’s kids’ mom.


Google Image search “jennifer aniston pregnant cover.” It will blow your fucking mind.




Why do people want this Jennifer Aniston baby thing to happen so hard? I mean, she’s rich, famous and has really good hair and a slammin’ body. I think she’s fine. Calm down, people’s moms.

This Is the Day When Things Fall into Place: Did Jesse Pinkman Really Matter? | 5 Shows After Dark 9/18/13

Comments Are Welcome, Bigots and Trolls Are Not

  • John W

    To paraphrase Ellen she'd better be careful, she might put someone's eye out.

  • jane

    Re: Mrs. Julien
    My theory is that
    A. She doesn't want kids.
    B. She knows this will hurt her career
    and C. She keeps the tabloids up and running with this and the married thing. Keeps her in the press and in people's minds.

  • cgthegeek

    Baby speculation, be it a celeb or a civilian, is just fucking rude. The risk for miscarriage during the first trimester is so prevalent, many women would rather not reveal they are pregnant until they are in their second trimester. No one wants to have to explain to everyone who knew they were pregnant that it ended so unexpectedly. No one.

  • pearl

    It is worth noting that her publicity team has been called out for planting some of these stories. She gets a lot of publicity with her 'sad and lonely' womb and is forced to reveal her stellar bikini abs whenever these rumors start up

  • F'mal DeHyde

    Poor woman can't even have taco bloat without the universe freaking out.

  • Sara_Tonin00

    It's all very bizarre. No one tracks Cameron Diaz this way.

    I kinda hope that Mrs J is right, because if Jennifer Aniston has actually been trying to get pregnant and having a hard time doing so or keeping the baby, this amount of coverage would make me truly insane.

    It does remind me though of a time in my early twenties, when I was in really good shape and said something about just wanting to get rid of the curve of my belly. And a guy was like, um, isn't that just your uterus? doesn't it require space?

    Yes, yes indeed it does.

  • Tinkerville

    Silly Courtney. Don't you know that Jennifer can never be a real woman until she has children, and she'll forever be unfulfilled and unhappy if she doesn't? These tabloids are only trying to help her. Bless them.

  • If she ever does decide she wants a baby, I hope she tells all the tabloids that she's going into rehab somewhere in Michigan, then bolts for a nice European estate where she can be gravid in peace. There is a sickness to all of this that no woman - pregnant or not - deserves.

  • $27019454

    For the word 'gravid' alone I hath upvoted thee.

  • Meli_V

    Wow, I knew the tabloids had written about possibly pregnancies, but this is insane! It's like the go to story on a slow news day.

  • Mrcreosote

    Yes, because a successful, attractive woman with many, many credits to her career who has done excellent work in both drama and comedy who has dealt with setbacks in a fairly classy way, and who seems genuinely to be a decent person needs to be defined by the contents of her uterus.

  • Imane Assi

    Thank you..Fact is that when she was married,her husband and her tried,she had 2 miscarriages and she WANTED children.We don't know why she didn't have one yet but there is no question that she wanted children very much

  • Mrs. Julien

    Or lack thereof.

  • Bert_McGurt

    Jennifer Aniston - single-handedly keeping abortion clinics in business since 2007 according to Star magazine.

  • L.O.V.E.

    My working theory is that she actually has been pregnant all those times. She carries the fetuses for the first trimester then has her team of doctors and scientists use secret cryochambers to incubate the kids until they grow into teens.
    When they are all grown they will wage war with Angelina's kids. Angelina's kids are genius operatives her team has recruited.

    Two small armies have been raised: one in secret and one out in the open.
    2021 is going to be a bloodbath.

  • BlackRabbit

    I was going to say she's just been selling them to Angelina. Yours is more fun and tasteful.

  • mswas

    Oh, @MrsJulien:disqus...

  • Slash


  • lowercase_ryan

    someone greenlight this please.

  • ViciousTrollop

    This will be Taylor Swift in 20 years.

  • Samantha Klein

    Wow. I don't pay attention to tabloid covers normally, so...that's really egregious. I kinda feel sorry for her now.

  • Guest

    How is it that I have already considered her a MILF for years now?

  • DeaconG

    Somehow I believe that if she REALLY wanted to get knocked up, it would happen.

    That being said, I'm pretty sure I've seen all those covers on those magazines at the grocery checkout, and it's really not funny anymore.

  • Sara_Tonin00

    Well, no. There are plenty of women who REALLY REALLY want to get knocked up, and can't. But if she wants to be a mother, she could. If she wants to personally give birth to her own child, it is definitely not a gimme.

  • oilybohunk7

    I wouldn't believe that she was pregnant unless she actually delivered the baby into my lap.

  • Mrs. Julien

    Even then, it could be a stunt baby.

  • Mrs. Julien

    I'm standing by my hypothesis that

    a. she doesn't want children
    b. she knows that revealing it could hurt her career

    I still feel sorry for the victim persona that the tabloids created for her, even if she does play the tabloids at times. Being the world's most famous jilted woman has got to get old very quickly. She should give Debbie Reynolds a call to commiserate.

  • Maguita NYC

    Which still does not explain this over-exaggerated obsession with her uterus!

    How many covers would that make in the last decade alone announcing anything Jennifer Aniston and a baby (pregnancy, adoption, loss, etc.)? And they keep putting them out there... So this basically means:

    Consumer assholes are not only buying this crap, but are also asking for more of it! And this made me sad.

  • Mrs. Julien

    I bet there is a PH.D. or M.A. thesis out there somewhere with a longitudinal analysis of the way tabloid stories function, their cycles, and what it shows about our celebrity culture. It's all archetypes and tropes, after all. Bread and circus.

  • Bert_McGurt

    Or in this case, Brad and circuses.

  • emmalita

    Maybe she did, and that's why she decided not to have kids.

    edit: I don't mean that to disparage Debbie Reynolds, her famous progeny, or her un-famous progeny. Just that having kids and raising them alone is hard.

  • Mrs. Julien

    Like DeaconG said below, I think that if she really wanted a child, she would have one by now. There are so many avenues open for having a baby when you are crazy rich (and famous).

blog comments powered by Disqus