Gwyneth Paltrow Hosts the World's Whitest Party
I am so awkwardly fascinated by this video. I must break it down. I must understand. For it is as though an alien landed upon this planet and threw a party made of fancy as learned from books and public television and fashion show audience pictures and said “now everyone look like you’re having fun!”
Cameron Diaz is completely losing her shit she is so excited to be there.
Gwnyeth Paltrow is completely losing her shit that this kid (Apple?) in a lion mask did a somersault and so is the whole party and for that alone this child will never be able to experience failure normally.
“I’m better than the poor!”
The children are childrening to Gwyneth’s exact specifications.
Croquet and other “lawn games.”
Bored fedora children.
The rarest site this side of Bigfoot: Chris Martin actually attending something related to his wife.
Paul McCartney doing a jaunty kick.
And it all ends with an incredibly long tepid kiss betwixt Gwyneth and Stella McCartney. This video is what will play in my brain’s screensaver.
Pajiba Love Express
Here's some Daveed Diggs for you. On Daveed Diggs' digs, actually. That man does things with clothes that should not make sense, but are absolutely perfect. (Go Fug Yourself)
Woody Allen has "so moved on" from his daughter's accusations and says he never even thinks about it. He equates her words about him to a bad review he won't read and comments on how wacky it is that Mia Farrow is his mother-in-law. He is the worst. (Celebitchy)
Not The Worst but still very gross: Leonardo DiCaprio and his
Here are 5 under-the-radar shows. I had never even heard of the first two. (Uproxx)